WHAT DO YOU DO...?

I wake up excited the next morning, it was earlier than I usually wake up. I have breakfast enough to have more energy, besides I was very hungry because I had not eaten well the last days, the aunt for this occasion lends me another Kimono looser, in the upper part it is white and has a kind of black pants.

I go to see Hiroki in the forest not far from the village, at the edge of the forest where I was sitting the other day with Hiroki's brother. Hiroki is waiting for me sitting on a rock with only a bow.

- I see you woke up earlier than you usually do- he raises a sarcastic eyebrow.

- That's as early as I can get up," I try to force a smile.

- Well, princess, we'll start with something basic for you; we'll use the bow.

- Why can't I start with the sword?

- It's heavy and not yet suitable for you, besides I don't want to see you complaining about me changing your weapon? But from what I see you will end up complaining about the training - he smiles ironically. He hands me the bow without telling me what to do.

- Aim at the tree and try to shoot it

- Is that all? -I refute him without knowing how to use it- won't you tell me what I have to do or how I have to aim?

- (sighs) then I'll give you a tip, aim the arrow at the tree and then pull the string until the back of the arrow is next to your cheek, watch well the point where you want to stick the arrow, then aim and shoot - he completely confused me with his instructions. I look at him stunned. - This way - he takes the bow out of my hands and does what he just said in his instructions. He takes the bow, pulls the string, aims at the fixed point of the tree and shoots with force and precision; he surprises me - now it's your turn - he said giving me back the bow, I do the same as Hiroki did, but I just miss, the arrow was too weak and it doesn't even hit the tree; Hiroki raises a sarcastic eyebrow.

I do the same thing again and again, so many attempts and I didn't hit any of them; we stay there for hours; he just looks at me very bored waiting for some life to have hit the arrow. I didn't give up, no matter how much I fail I can't give up, I can only think of beating Satoshi.

-I blush and try to ignore him. "Are we going to stay one more life? - he said jokingly. I don't manage to listen to him because I don't want to lose my concentration and keep trying -come I show you how to do it- he stands up from the stone he was sitting on, he comes closer to me, positions himself behind me and takes both my arms pointing to the tree, he stays a couple of seconds aiming, but he doesn't shoot; Hiroki suddenly stands still, without even pulling the rope.

-Mm... Hiroki? -he lowers the bow slowly so suddenly that I can't understand what he is going to do, he puts his face on the surface of my shoulders and next to my neck, where I felt his breath near the nape of my neck, my heart starts to beat so abruptly -What...? What are you doing?

-shh... - quiet my voice -Don't ruin the moment... Not now... - she said almost whispering. I frown in confusion "what bug bit him?" he was kind of weird. He lowers the bow until it drops to the ground and then prostrates his hands on my waist. I blush instantly, my heart is beating so fast that I am also unable to make any noise or say any words -.... Don't say again... That you're not the woman I want to protect.... If you get lonely... I'll make you feel as uncomfortable as possible.... - He said so softly that I feel the touch of his skin causing me to shiver. I swallow nervously.

-... And I'm not wrong? -I'm talking about the fact that I'm not the woman that you want to protect.... I've realized... That you like... Someone else... that's why I told you that I can get you out of our engagement... - I lower my voice nervously, a little out of place, I don't know what I'm saying.

- You think that if you weren't... Would I still protect you?... There is a reason why I protect you, please... don't deny the commitment... - I was taken out of place when I heard those words, I can't speak, I can't understand what he meant, I can only remember what Kimura said... but I couldn't believe it. I can't even breathe.

He just stays tied to me for a long time. We didn't even finish the practice; and we didn't talk to each other since then, every time I saw him I remembered everything he said, even the warm atmosphere that just made me feel nervous and awkward next to him. On the one hand, I am very happy that he opened up to me, but is he telling me the truth? Now that every time he gets closer to me I start to babble so much?

A good while passes, the rain springs up without warning and the sun hides in gray clouds. I sit on the porch of the mansion admiring the rain remembering everything Hiroki told me this morning, in the talk with his brother and in everything I am starting to feel for Hiroki, too.... it gives me some nostalgia to see the rain so beautiful, like when I was in the palace, it seems like it happened a long time ago and in reality... it was only two weeks ago, but I can't help seeing it and missing my favorite part of the castle, the fountain, for me that fountain is so calm, so serene that only gives me tranquility when I'm sad, but... I don't have it anymore in my life, and now my new happy place is the rain and the porch of the mansion.

Naoki thoughtfully finds me.

- What are you doing here? - He smiles, approaches me and sits next to me, also admiring the rain.

- thinking... - I return the same gesture, with a more disguised smile.

- Did Hiroki keep bothering you? - he asks teasingly; I didn't tell him anything, I just didn't want to tell him what happened in the forest. I shook my head.

- I just... I think about... Satoshi - I told him lying so I wouldn't have to give any explanation, Naoki has been very nice to me, but I don't trust him as much as I trust Hiroki.

- That man who only hurt her... He lied to us - he said with a little bit of anger - but at least you are not alone... Just think that we are here for you.... - he sits next to me looking at me with his eyes fixed on me - ... And I will always be for you... - He said seriously opening his heart, I just give him a nice friendly gesture. Suddenly Hiroki interrupts us and when I see him I feel my heart beating again very strongly, with my cheeks pink or even intense red, I don't rush to look him in the eyes, because I feel very uncomfortable, because when I see him I remember his confession in the forest.

- Naoki! - exclaims his name to the young man - it's your turn to be the guard, I'll take care of the princess - he said bossy.

- Don't worry... I can take care of her too," she looked at him defiantly.

- It's ok... Naoki, you can go - I told him kindly to give him a sign that I had many things to talk with Hiroki, he withdraws a little bit annoyed. Hiroki sits next to me very serious, or as I usually see him without a single expression, it was already a habit to see him like that... I give a long sigh as we watch the rain. I put my head on his shoulder relaxing it and try to feel calm, his scent invades me completely and makes my heart beat very hard.

- How hard can I break down? - I ask him seriously, leaning my head on his shoulder.

- that depends on how far you want to go and how far you've fallen - he looks me in the eyes smiling, I return the gesture shyly. - Even so, I see that you have progressed.... I see you are more dedicated - he said this time very polite and affectionate? It's strange that he's usually nice, every time he says some nice comment, my heart bursts and palpitates quite a lot; I think I had already got used to him being rude that, it makes me a little uncomfortable part of his new treatment.

- You don't have to... Be so nice... I think I've gotten used to your coldness.... That I usually see in your eyes that you only console me because I feel lonely... - I said looking at him a little sad... changing my smile. It's true, in your eyes you still have the look that your feelings belong to someone else.

- Do you still think I do it to keep my promise...? - she raised her eyes in surprise at that question, reaffirming what she said in the forest... But it's not possible, because he still... Or I just want to convince myself not to make the same mistake with Satoshi.... I'm scared... I don't want to get hurt again and I don't want to be the fool again that use it, the rain stops at this moment becoming slower....