Emotions from the past

"It's all happened nearly two years ago, you fell in love with me, and I rejected you because it wasn't mutual… You couldn't handle it, a year and a half later, you… jumped off a building…" she said in a sad accent.

Her words made me feel mad; like I was the most pathetic human on the planet, as lifting my eyebrows and gazing at Sara with widely opened eyes I said, "What the hell! Killing myself for some girl…! Are you sure you are telling the truth?"

She got upset because of what I said, "Some girl… seriously…? Anyway, I don't have a reason to lie to you, what I have told you, was the truth."

"Okay, I tried to kill myself, but what I meant is that, are you sure that… you were the reason for me doing it?" I lifted one eyebrow; since I didn't think she deserves whoever she was.

"Yes, I'm sure" in confidence.

"Tell me, how you are so sure?"

She pulled a sheet of paper from her pocket and gave it to me; I took it in a slow-motion while asking her, "What is that?"

She looked away, "read it,"

I opened the paper and saw that it was a letter written by…me to… Sara,

<< Dear Sara

Hola mi amor!!

:) I was just kidding… So, Hmm…I wrote this letter for you "Sara" to let you know that I lost a lot since you've been gone, and I don't see any relation between your vanishing and the things that began happening to me from losing my friends to having problems with my parents, but I have a theory and it says that when you were here, you simply made me a better man, I always fix my mood by looking at your face; your angelic face, while your green eyes made me calmer and under control, however, as God gave you the ability to make me happy, he also gave you the ability to do the opposite and making me the saddest man on earth, I know I'm not handsome as you or rich or even a cool guy, and I might be skipping the fact that you are a Bi…

However, I can tell you that being in Love with you is unfortunately beyond my power, I didn't choose to love you, this crazy heart chose to fall into you, and the crazier brain decided to not stop thinking about you.

So…In conclusion, and since I can't stay alive without you, I decided to… let this harmed soul leaves that body in the next three days unless you decided to give me a chance to prove myself, just a chance…That's all I'm asking.

Your_only_Lover

Kasseri Assam >>

-To be honest, I nearly dropped tears while reading the letter I sent to Sara, and couldn't believe that I wrote that…But what made me question more is that Sara said that I did suicide and… SHE KNEW.-

"So… that's the letter I sent?" I asked, folding the paper.

"Yes."

"Okay, let me get this clear, I was in love with you and sent you a letter telling you that I was about to suicide, and what I don't understand is that you said I did suicide, right ?" the dangerous mood swings started taking advantages on me and I wasn't able to handle the flux of emotions in my body.

She nodded her head affirmatively saying that I did try to kill myself; I tried to put things together in my mind, "I want to know if you just did anything to stop me…? And to save a human being from death!"

"I didn't know you were talking seriously!" she interrupted me.

I was shocked by her words, "What…? So you just decided to ignore it…" my voice became louder with every second I thought about what happened, "…A fucking suicide's letter Sara…! You just decided to ignore it…! Not even take it to someone…"

"Like whom?" she said with a pathetic-sad accent.

"My parents…Sara! Police…Sara! Any fuc*king person Sara..!"

She got scared; putting her hands on her ears, as I yelled at her, and the people around us noticed that we were fighting, so they kept looking at us.

I took a deep breath while Sara was looking down, "You know something…You were right, I wish I didn't know you…" as saying those words to her I walked away while a dangerous combination of emotions was inside me eating me out.

I was confused about where to head, I don't have somewhere else to go except my parents' home but I was so mad at them for lying to me.

-What made me angrier was that I couldn't even find another place to go, why? Because I lost my memory.-

With no money, I began walking with no specific direction, just walking.

It was the lunchtime and my stomach was empty, I sat on the side of the road waiting for no one until I saw Sara getting off a taxi and running toward me, I stood up preparing to ask her why she comes but I barely pulled my tongue to talk before she surprised me with a kiss; a kiss that I was never able to resist it.

After the French kiss, she said, "I'm Sara Rosemary, nice to meet you."

I responded with a big smile drawn on my face "Kasseri Assam, it's a pleasure, my lady," she gripped my arm and said with the sexiest voice I've ever heard, "Well, Mr. Kasseri, I'd like to go on a date with you".

I responded with a more giant smile on my face, "Again, it is a pleasure for me, my lady."

-See…More dramatic, more romantic, and more exciting, but less honest.-

The car that stopped next to me was a gray, and the person who came for me was my dad, he ran toward me; I thought he was angry or something until I noticed the tears in his eyes so I was relieved since I knew he was just sad; however, I wish I didn't relive, as he reached me, he slapped me as hard as he could.

I felt like my cheek was hewn from my face, "Why did…" before I finished my words, he attracted me to his lap and hugged me; also as hard as he could, and by those actions, my father could erase all the feelings of rage and hatred inside of me.