Chapter 3: Carter

I stood in the doorway of my new apartment, there were so many boxes I would have to unpack soon. Lorenzo put his hands on his hips smiling looking at the boxes that were going to be unpacked soon. A unknown feeling sat in my chest standing in something that belonged to me.

I sat on the futon we set up, taking a moment to relax. It wasn't a lot of boxes but the time it was going to take me to unload everything was making me tired.

" Are you going to be okay by yourself?" Lorenzo asked.

" I'll be fine. Go on and see Mercedes before she has to leave." I said.

I was going to be okay and sometimes I had to remind myself of that. He stood there waiting for me to something else besides 'I'm fine' because 'I'm fine' was not good enough for him. This time I was sure though I was going to be okay, I got my own place now.

" Call me if you feel like something is wrong. Mercedes and I will come over and spend the night here if we have too,"Lorenzo sighed. I flipped through the channels on the tv hoping to find something that was going to keep my attention. " I'm serious Carter. I almost lost you once and I don't know what I would do with myself if that happens again." He frowned.

I paused whatever was on the tv. I looked at Lorenzo and we didn't have to share words for me to know what he was saying. For now, I just wanted to watch the show and be by myself and I knew he was just trying to look out for me, but I was fine.

" I'm fine, really. Go on and have fun with Mercedes and I'll see you in the morning." I said.

Lorenzo said his final goodbye and left. I sat up on the couch watching whatever was on the tv knowing I would not be able to fall asleep anytime soon. I watched a series of shows and checked my phone for any updates. It was my first time being alone and I didn't know what I was supposed to do, as long as I kept myself from thinking about what I've been through.

Instead, I grabbed my journal and wrote how I was feeling. My therapist told me If I wrote down how I felt that maybe it would help. In the beginning, it was hard because I didn't know how to speak about what I had gone through and writing it down in a notebook made it feel real.

As much as I didn't want to relive those moments, writing everything down helped a lot. It was just my way of speaking without saying it out loud. I put my notebook and pencil under my pillow and laid down staring at the ceiling. It was hard for me to go to sleep on my own, but I learned how to calm my mind down and relax

" How did everything go last night?" Lorenzo asked.

I sat on the couch eating the breakfast that Lorenzo bought over. Spending the night alone went well, I didn't have any nightmares and it felt good. " It was good." I smiled.

" I'm glad. I'm going to see if I can get my motorcycle, you're coming with me." Lorenzo grabbed his plate and put it in the sink. He cleaned up the kitchen and sat on the couch waiting for me to come with him. I walked in my room placing my journal in a shoebox, placing in the closet for later.

I had to make sure no one got to the journal because there were things I didn't tell him. Things that Lorenzo couldn't know and I want to keep him out of whatever I was feeling - whatever I going through at the moment and keep it to myself until I felt comfortable.

We showed up at the shop that Lorenzo was going to get his motorcycle fixed at. There were motorcycles sitting on the sides of the shop and inside there were unfinished bikes that needed to be worked on. Lorenzo looked around waiting for help.

I walked up to the counter looking at the pictures of painted cars and bikes. I was lost in the shop and how comfortable I felt here and I didn't realize someone had come to help us.

" I'm so sorry for the long wait. How may I help you?" The girl asked. She was beautiful and for a moment I forgot the reason why I was even here. Her midnight black hair shined in the light and her clothes were covered in soot.

" My friend came to get his bike fixed. How long will it take to fix it?" I asked.

She looked at her schedule, giving me a smile in return. " I can fix it today and you can come back in a few hours, or I can fix it tomorrow and you can get it back a day from now." She smiled.

" Today will be fine." I smiled in return. She went off with Lorenzo to get his bike, so she could look at it. I thought a day out was going to be terrible, but meeting that girl felt nice.

" Let's go eat. It's going to take them a couple of hours to fix it." Lorenzo walked out the shop. I followed him but I didn't know her name and I didn't know if she was still going to be in the shop when I got back.

We sat at a table waiting for our lunch, Lorenzo looked at me and smiled. " I seen you talking to her. I'm glad I got you out the house," he chuckled. " I lied about the bike it belongs to Mercedes, but I'm getting it fixed, so she has something when she comes back." He looked at his phone and co tinted to smile.

He tricked me. He knew that I would refuse to leave my new home and he knew that I would go with him if he asked. I shook my head and laughed at myself because I couldn't believe that I fell for it. But, I had to love him because I know he was always going to do what was best for me no matter what. I was just waiting for him to walk out of my life like everyone else.