DEATH LETTER

The words of the doctor runs on my mind like a loop for few seconds.

I was utterly shocked, i don't even know why, I became a strong man these days but out of nowhere the tears stir up in my eyes.

I just don't understand what he's talking about for a second and can't even control the flow of tears.

" What the fuck do you mean by I'm sorry? There seriously must be a way, don't act like she can't be alive" I yelled at the doctor.

But after a second, i controlled myself and apologized to that doctor.

" Well! I'm sorry doctor, but please don't say there's no way left" I said.

" I really am sorry, I just can't do anything else, even if i do stitching work on the wound, it probably won't do anything, it can't be treated by stitches, even if so, she'll not live long, it's a bit deep shot, but I was surprised how could she be still alive upto now? There's almost no way" said doctor.

" So.... Is... She.... Dead now?" I asked hesitatingly.

God, please don't do this to me, I want her to be alive, please God, i request you, please

....

Doctor felt sad for me as I've never cried like this before, I thought I became somewhat of a stone hearted guy, but i realised it now that my heart is weaker than cotton,or like an ice melting always but only for her, but my tears seems to have melted the doctor's heart.

" Not yet! But she's going to, but by seeing you cry this much, I want to say one thing, I mean There's only a single way left to revive her but we need a heart donor for that, unluckily we don't have any" doctor said.

I stopped my tears for a minute.

I mean they stopped on it's own after listening to the doctor's words.

" You mean there's still a way? " I asked.

The doctor nods.

The happiness that dives into my heart now is much more bigger than any ocean in the world, I was overflooded with happy tears for a second after knowing that she can still be alive.

" Heart donor, right?... Can my heart fit in? " I asked curiously.

" Are you serious? I just wanted you to know about that method, but you're taking it seriously, if you donate yours, you can never be able to see the day of light forever" doctor said.

I didn't even think about it twice, the only thing that my heart is instructing me now is to protect her.

" If that's the only way left, I'm in" I said.

" I mean I'm not sure whether you heart can suit in to her, let's check once and then go for the operation if your heart can fit into her" doctor said.

" Ok! " I said.

" Seriously, I've never seen a husband like you sacrificing for your wife" doctor said.

" She will be alive, right? " I asked very curiously.

" Most probably if your heart can fit in,...really I never met someone like you, if that's your choice, very well then, wait for few seconds, we'll be arranging everything and will call you" doctor said.

And that doctor left to operation theatre.

The god showed me light once again but I can see this light only for now, I already promised her I'll protect her with all my life, I'll never go down on my word.

I'm so damn fine with my decision, this was the first time my brain and heart co-ordinated entirely without leaving me in any secondary thoughts.

The only thought I have in both of them is to protect her no matter what it takes, even if it means my life.

I seriously have very less time left, I want to do one thing before leaving this existence.

There's an empty paper note in the hospital, I took it and started writing down one last letter to her.

" Dear aira,

I know you'll be hating me after knowing the decision I made, I know you'll cry for me so bad, honestly I have so many people who worries and cries about me, but the one whom I care and worry about the most is you, I've had a family which gave me more than enough love, but i never gave it to anyone, if I want to give it to someone, that someone must be you, this is the secret that I've hidden for years, I want to uncover this secret to you in person, but I don't have that much luck, but that doesn't mean I'm not lucky at all, atleast this way I'll feel like I protected the one whom I love a lot and always will, I also want to admit you something, the one who written that letter and the one whom you are searching for is the one who's writing you this letter, these many years i hidden my love on you in myself, but my heart just gets heavy with every second passing by, but now while writing this letter, I feel it's getting bit lighter, it's like I'm showing off my love on you to you atleast like this, I feel so great now, but only for a limited time... I'll feel great, now i understood the complete meaning of the line I've once said out of nowhere, pain never decreases, only the effect of it decreases, but I feel like even the effect won't be decreased.. I'm sorry for hiding my love these many years, but I am just so scared that you'll never ever talk to me after knowing my feelings on you...fine anyways, ...eat well, be good with everyone, don't pick on sashank all the time, this is the life now I'm giving to you, don't waste it okay?..... Well I have one last word to say,... I love you.... so much....in every dimension and in every universe".

I've done that weirdo signature I've done before and handed over to the doctor to give it to aira after and if she woke up with the life I'm about to give if possible to fit in.

Atleast this way, i confessed my long lasting and forever unbreakable love to my girl.

Doctors called me in and told me a great news that my heart can fit in after checking into blood groups and all other factors.

Idk why, I feel so different now, i failed to live up on my promise to my brother, he'll be very angry on me, but I wish I could live some more days with all my family, friends and her.

All my memories with my brother, mother, father and entire family striked my brain again.

Those were really golden days, those funny moments with my brother, they were so nostalgic, I wish I could see all of them once and for all, but i was lacking luck in that aspect I guess.

This time I don't want to hide my tears, i let it come willingly as this will be the last time thinking about all of these people and bursting out my emotions.

I should thank God for giving me such a lovely family.

I lived my life better, but my only wish to have her in my life forever, now got burnt into ashes, I'm a fine but very unlucky guy.

But somehow, I'm protecting my girl, I feel very happy now but somewhere somewhat very sad too.

I could have done few things much more better in my past life, but it's all done now.

I want to live my life with her, but there's no way left.

The operation went on and ended taking off..... My.....

TO BE CONTINUED...