I Felt Like I Had Something To Prove

"Are you sure you have to go back today?" I asked as I bit my lip nervously. "You are the CEO and president, you can give yourself a couple more days can't you?"

Damon finished tying his tie in the mirror and walked over to the bed I was sitting on. "I have to get back. Remington can only do so much Love." He took my chin between his finger and thumb and then made my eyes meet his. "You can do this. I know you can. You're strong Kaydence."

"What if she cries and I can't get her to calm down?" This was the first time Scarlett and I were going to be alone. Sterling was at school and after almost a week Damon had to go back to work.

"You have Rose here with you. If you need anything she has made it clear she will be right here for you." He was trying to be reassuring to me. "Your mother also offered to come help you if needed. But if you absolutely need me I will be here as quickly as I can."

I nodded and let out a sigh. "I know. I don't know why I'm so nervous about this."

"Because you're still adjusting." He responded.

"Yeah." I bit my lip.

Scarlett was a week old now and she seemed to begin to adjust to her surroundings. Damon and I however were running on only a few hours of sleep here and there. It was rough but we were getting through it the best we could right now. Damon's medication was kicking in so that was helping. I didn't have to stress over him along with everything else.

I was still dealing with my hormones. I had moments where I felt normal and then I had moments where I just wanted to cry. I was also frustrated with myself because after a few days of no latching Damon and I agreed that formula was the best route for Scarlett. The nurse at the hospital was right, as long as I made sure her stomach was full I was doing my job. I was frustrated though because part of me was relieved I wouldn't have to stress over it anymore which in return made the other part of me feel like I had taken the easy way out.

"I have to get going." I could see in his face that he was reluctant to leave but in the end, we couldn't hide in the mansion forever.

"Okay." I nodded. "I don't want to keep you too long."

He lowered his lips to meet mine. He gave me a gentle but loving kiss goodbye. I watched as he then went to the bassinet beside the bed and gave Scarlett a kiss. He headed for the door of the bedroom and then turned around. "I love you. Call me if you need anything and I'll make arrangements."

"I love you too. Thank you." I responded.

And like that he was off to work. Scarlett had just finished her morning feeding while he had gotten ready and was down for a nap. With how little sleep I got I figured maybe it was smart to take one too. I wrapped myself in the silk sheets and closed my eyes. I drifted off to sleep with ease.

I don't know how long I had actually slept but I was woken up to Scarlett's cry. I maneuvered myself out of the bed to go for the bassinet. At least I wasn't as sore anymore. It was easier to move around now and I was thankful for that. I don't know what I would've done if Damon had gone back to work when walking felt like it was a major chore for me.

I checked her diaper and as expected she needed a change. I finished that up and then got her a bottle ready for feeding. I sat on the bed as I fed her. She downed the ounces she wanted and then it was time to burp her. Once it seemed she was satisfied I attempted to place her back in the bassinet to maybe get a little more sleep.

She was not having it though. The moment I set her down she began to cry. I picked her back up and rocked her in my arms. She seemed to fall asleep so after a few minutes I attempted the bassinet for a second time. She woke up the moment she had been set down. I repeated the rocking once more but everytime she was set in the bassinet she woke right up and cried.

This proceeded to go on for the next hour. All I was attempting was to get her to sleep so I could. I felt myself starting to get frustrated, I was just so tired from last night and I wanted some sleep. Before I realized it a few tears of frustration started to stream down my face as Scarlett cried out from being set down.

There was a knock at the bedroom door. "Yes?" I called out as calmly as I could.

The door opened and Rose came in. I could see she was filled with concern as she looked between Scarlett and I. "Can I help in any way Kaydence?" She asked.

I quickly wiped the few tears that escaped away and let out a sigh. "I don't know. She refuses to be set down right now. She's making it hard to get any rest."

"May I pick her up?" Rose asked.

"Yeah." I nodded as I took a seat on the bed.

Rose made her way to the bassinet and picked Scarlett up. The crying instantly seemed to stop as Rose rocked her in her arms. As much as I appreciated Rose coming in I was a little disappointed. I was trying so hard to prove to myself I could do this on my own.

"I can take her downstairs for a while with me if you'd like to get some sleep Kaydence." Rose offered. "It looks like you could use a break."

"I guess that would be okay." I finally agree after contemplating it for a moment.

"Kaydence, you seemed a little reluctant to answer. May I ask why?" Rose sat next to me on the bed as she held Scarlett.

"I don't know. I felt like I had something to prove to myself I guess and well I didn't accomplish it." I answered.

"What were you trying to prove?" She questioned me further.

"That I could do this whole motherhood thing. That I could handle one day of being alone with her." I responded.

"There's nothing wrong with having a little help here and there Kaydence." Rose spoke reassuringly. "We're all here for you both, and believe me as a mother myself I know this is tough. Don't be ashamed to let others make it at least a little easier for you when they can."

"I just don't want to feel like I'm pawning her off to others because I can't do it or something." I sighed.

"You're not doing that at all." Rose looked down at Scarlett and then back up to me. "Have you ever heard that quote that it takes a village to raise a child?"

"Yes." I answered.

"It's absolutely true. I don't know what I would've done without my mother when I had all of my children." Rose spoke. "Your family and I are essentially your village. Now get some rest and I'll bring her back in a couple hours."