It's Time I Take My Life Back

(Damon's POV)

I walked into the empty mansion after a long day of work. Kaydence left a few days ago and the children were with her at my father's. I had hoped she would cave in and come back. However that didn't seem very likely right now. She would hardly have a conversation when I called to check in on her and the kids.

She would only answer questions about the children. Any further conversation she would find an excuse to hang up. I could sometimes hear Sterling in the background asking to talk to me but she wouldn't let him. I knew I had really fucked up again. She was hurt and this was all on me.

I entered the empty bedroom and began to remove my suit. It was a longer workday and truthfully I wasn't in a rush to get back here. The quiet I had once preferred when I was alone had become unbearable. Somehow it made me sleep worse than when Scarlett had a rough night sleeping.

As I stripped off my shirt I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I walked over closer to it. My eyes immediately went to my shoulder. My wound had healed but I would have this scar with me forever. It felt like a reminder of how I had let my guard down. How I let myself get weak.

I hated looking at myself. All it did was remind me of what happened and the monster I had become. No matter how hard I tried to be okay I just wasn't. It was my own fucking fault too. I had been so damn close but I fucked it up because I let my pride get in the way. I was no better than my sister, she refused help for her problems too. Now look at her.

I could feel my pent up rage start to surface. I could no longer contain myself. I threw around what I could. Scattering papers and little things around. Throwing things at the wall to make them shatter into pieces. I didn't care if anything broke. These were just things that could be replaced, lord knows I had enough money to replace everything in this house ten times over. Everything except for my family.

I caught another look of myself in the mirror. The rage and anger were clear on my face. I clenched my fist and punched the mirror hard. It shattered to the floor in pieces. I opened up my fist and looked at the damage to my hand. Just a few cuts but nothing major. They would heal just fine.

I walked into the bathroom and cleaned the cuts with water in the sink. I made sure no glass remained in the cuts. Once finished I looked up and saw myself in the mirror once more. This time was different though.

I looked like shit. There were bags developing under my eyes from not sleeping. Hell, I hadn't even eaten much in the last few days since she left. I was becoming a mess. More of a mess than I was before.

I took a deep breath in and let it out. I finished stripping down and got into the shower. I needed to think. The shower was the perfect place, it's sometimes where some of my best ideas came to me. The heat from the water helped calm me down.

I stayed there until the water ran cold. I exited the shower and wrapped the towel around my waist. Walking back into the room I looked over the mess I had made. I had a problem, it was clear as day. I had to stop living in denial, all it was doing was affecting those around me.

I took a deep breath in and let it out. My problem is I felt like when I was shot the stronger version of me died. I had let it consume me trying to find the culprit in hopes that I could feel my strength again. It had taken up so much of my life it was like I would've been better off dying anyway.

I took in another breath. It was time for me to break down the walls I had been putting up. It's time I take my life back. Not just for me but for my family. I needed to get on with this treatment. I needed Kaydence and the children back.

Kaydence was the love of my life. I had damaged our relationship and lied to her. She had trusted me and I let her down. I needed to prove myself. I couldn't prove myself if I remained this broken shell of who I was.

After another sleepless night I got up and had to get ready for work. I got dressed and headed towards the garage. I got into my black BMW and went on my way. I dialed Justin up over the bluetooth in the car.

"Hello?" He answered after a few rings.

"My office at nine sharp. We need to talk." I instructed and then hung up.

I continued on with my drive and pulled into the parking garage. I parked the BMW in my designated spot and headed right up to my office. I kept to myself as I walked the halls. I didn't even greet Stacey as I walked past her and through the doors of my office. I could tell she was nervous to interact with me.

I sat down at my desk and began to turn everything on. Justin should be showing up soon. I loaded up my computer to go over the things I needed to do. The phone on my desk rang and I answered it on speaker. It was just Stacey.

"Mr. Moore is here to see you." She spoke. I could hear the slight nervousness in her tone.

"Send him in." I ordered and hung up.

Justin entered seconds later and took a seat in front of me. "What's this about?"

I turned my attention away from my computer and to him. "I need to take a step back from all of this. I fear that if I don't get myself together that I'm going to lose everything for good."

"Okay." He nodded. "Just because you have to take a step back doesn't mean I have to."

"What do you mean?" I furrowed my brows as I responded.

"Let me continue to look into this for you. After all the trouble I caused, it's the least I can do." Justin offered.

I raised a brow at him. "Don't act like you're going to do this out of the kindness of your heart. I know you better than that. Just because you've been treated doesn't change who you are."

Justin thought for a moment. "I still need you. Each one of the men you have that could be my father are now businessmen. I don't have the pull you do to get to the answers."

"I see." He was right. He was now a nobody, he couldn't get close enough to find out.

"So go get yourself straightened out. I'll keep finding out what info I can on your shooter." He continued. "Then when you're yourself, you can bring them down to their knees. Like the true scary motherfucker we both know you can be."