CHAPTER 11

I woke up the next morning feeling off.

Last night...

Yeah. That happened. I guess there's no turning back for things now.

I sighed and shifted a little in bed. I felt uncomfortable with what happened. I wish none of it had happened. Maybe I shouldn't have picked him up from the party.

I heard my phone ring and picked it up without looking at the name.

"Hey… How much did I drink last night?"

I laughed a little at Zach's question. He must have been home for a while now.

"You didn't know yourself," I answered sitting up in my bed. He groaned at what I said.

"That must mean over twenty."

I rolled my eyes as I hugged my legs.

"You've got to stop drinking so much. You're going to hurt yourself in the long run."

"So what?"

There was a bit of silence after he finished.

"So... what happened last night?"

I felt my eyes widen with shock.

"You... don't remember?"

He laughed.

"If I say yes will you act less nervous?"

"I-I'm not acting nervous around you," I quickly retaliated.

"Jessica, I know you. Right now you are playing with your fingers or just fidgeting with something. You just can't forget last night, can you?"

I looked down at my and saw that he was right and quickly let go of my sweatpants and placed my hand down on my bed.

"So what if I can't get over last night? You had no right to do what you did! If you really wanted to do something like that you should've called up Emma."

There was another pause of silence.

"You still don't believe what I said, do you?"

"How am I supposed to believe anything when you are black out drunk?!"

"I wasn't that drunk! I knew what I was doing!"

"Oh really? Well fuck you then! How dare you take my first kiss! And after what happened with your stupid truth or dare game? You're selfish Zach."

I hung up the phone and slammed it down on my bed.

He had no right to do any of that. Stupid asshole.

My phone buzzed and I looked at it this time seeing a message from Ian.

That's right. He was asking me about going out today.

I picked up my phone and read the text already thinking of what to respond with.

Ian- 'You still up for a date?'

Me- 'Yeah why not'

Ian- 'Awesome! I'll be there around 1 or 2'

I turned off my phone after seeing the text and slowly slipped out of bed. I hopped in the shower and got ready for the 'date'. I stood under the water letting it run over me. As I stood there I remembered last night I couldn't help but remember the feel of Zach's hands on me. I slowly put my hand there and sighed feeling my heart race.

The water's too hot. Everything is too hot.

I turned off the water and stepped out. I got dressed in a turtleneck and some jeans. I did some light makeup and put in some different piercings. I was tying the shoelaces of my heeled boots when I saw a text from Ian. I quickly grabbed my stuff and walked out the front door. Ian stopped his car in front of my house and I looked over at him through the window. He smiled and I felt a bit of anxiety crawl up my chest. He stepped out of the car and waved.

"Shall we go?"

I nodded my head for some reason having lost my voice. I couldn't speak and I didn't know if it was because I didn't want to or honestly couldn't. That smile never left Ian's face as he led me to his car and let me into the passenger seat. I sat there with a blank expression on my face though not knowing what to feel in the end.

I couldn't help but think of Zach as I sat there in his car. I wish I could be with him. But then again remembering yesterday makes me think otherwise.

I looked over at Ian watching him concentrate on the road before him and couldn't help but just stare.

He was hot. And from the time I've spent with him at our club he is a nice guy. Funny, interesting, and secretly caring. He doesn't look at it at first but he really is a sweet guy. I was surprised he wanted to take me out. I have until Monday after break to really figure things out.

Ian's voice snapped me out of my thoughts.

"Enjoying the view?"

I forgot I was staring at him and quickly looked away.

"A-ah sorry."

I take everything I said about Ian back. He's a cocky jerk.

I folded my arms and looked out the window watching the trees and other scenery fly by. I was familiar with the direction we were going. It was to a park. A more nature based park for people to enjoy. Not many people knew I liked this place.

I used to take walks with my father here.

When we finally got to a parking spot I stepped out and took a deep breath of the fresh air. Jerk or not Ian was honestly a good guy. I'm surprised he knew I liked coming here. Unless he doesn't know and just took a wild guess.

As I took in the outside I felt a cold air rush by me and shivered at the feeling. I rubbed my arms when I felt a coat being put on me. I looked over my shoulder to see Ian putting on a heavy black coat over me.

"What are you doing?"

"You're cold right? I brought an extra jacket for you to wear."

"Oh. Thank you."

I shouldn't be rude to him or go against him. He really is just trying to spend time with me and possibly date me. He really does care about me.

I wrapped my arms around the coat feeling another gush of wind coming and dug my face into it taking in Ian's smell.

It smells good.

I felt my heart speed up a bit.

I didn't reject it.

"C'mon let's go."

Ian held out his hand as if wanting me to hold it but I kept my arms in a crossed position keeping my hands tucked. I did it mainly to keep them warm but because I didn't want to hold his hand. Kind or not I was still not sure what to feel. And I didn't want to lead him on. Besides, my heart was racing. I don't know why but I didn't want him to notice through my hands. I didn't want to give him that advantage.

We started to walk down a path taking in the scenery and I couldn't help but let a smile into my face. It was beautiful out here. Especially with it being fall. The mix of the red and orange leaves and the grass losing its green color looking brown with the light blue sky. It all blended well together, taking my breath away. Not many people knew I was a sucker for scenery but I guess Ian found that out.

I looked over at him, a smile still on my face when he looked over as well. Our eyes locked and I felt heat rise to my cheeks a little. He smiled back at me and I quickly looked away.

I can't do this. I had a lot of things running through my head but one thing was pretty clear.

Maybe I was falling for him.

Without thinking I let my arms go, my hands at my side. I waited for Ian to grab my hand when he finally did and I jolted at the feeling. Despite it being cold out, his hand was warm. I liked that feeling.

We walked for a bit before stopping and sitting at a bench watching the clouds above. It wasn't that cold to me since I had Ian's coat. I couldn't help but be surrounded by his scent. I really liked it for some reason.

I felt like there was something I was forgetting.

"You enjoying our date?"

Ian snapped me out of my thoughts and I looked over at him, still a little spaced out.

"Yeah..."

He looked back at me but concerned instead of happy with my response.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry. I wish I didn't reject you so soon."

"Reject me?"

"In my mind I had made up that I wouldn't be with you but I don't know. Things feel different now."

He laughed a little at my words.

"That means it's working. I'm doing things right."

I looked at him, seeing his smile look so good on his face. I was right. He is hot. I was lucky he wanted to be with me.

Maybe it wouldn't be such a bad thing to like him.

Ian stopped his car in front of my house and I looked over at him. He smiled and I felt warmth in my heart. The date had ended too soon and I was just starting to really enjoy things. We didn't talk much. We just walked and talked about random things. Nothing specific but nothing pointless.

I sat there and it took me a second to realize we had fully stopped.

"Oh uh, thank you for lending me your jacket." I started to take it off when Ian held up a hand.

"Keep it. It looks better on you anyway."

I stopped and looked at him confused before putting it back on.

"Ok... thank you."

I stayed there in his car not really wanting to get out. I was tired but wanted to stay with him a little longer. He made me feel good about myself. He made me feel cared for and wanted.

I liked that.

"I enjoyed today. Thank you for taking me."

"I'm happy you enjoyed it. And..." Ian paused and sighed before locking eyes with me looking deep into them. "I'm hoping we can do it again."

"What..?"

"You free Wednesday?"

"The day before thanksgiving?"

"Yeah," he answered, laughing a little. I slouched down in the seat.

"I'm free then. Why?"

"How about I take you out on another date?"

Once again I was shocked. He really was serious about this. I opened his car door and started to get out.

"Yeah go for it. I'll see you then. But don't get any ideas!"

I closed the door before he could say anything and walked into my house. I felt a small smile grow on my lips and closed my eyes taking in a deep breath.

I just want to see what happens. I won't make any decisions until I have to. I'll just let things take me wherever I go.

I got up and walked into my room and fell to me bed. I took off Ian's jacket and set it down on my bed beside me. I thought back to our date today. I held his jacket and took another deep breath in. I loved this smell. It was something I had never really experienced before.

As I was starting to get deep in my thoughts my phone rang. I looked over and it was a friend group on discord. I shot up in bed and sat up before looking over to my computer. I got out of bed and turned on my computer before putting on my headphones.

The thoughts can wait.