Chapter Two: Gabe's Hope

Gabe's P.O.V

She brushed me off twice this morning. Lena kept staring at the clock like she was waiting for something. Or maybe it was more like she was remembering something.

I think we all were. Something about this junior year feels off. Almost like we were all teleported to the past. But I tried to act like things were normal, I tried to talk to Lena like she was my best friend. Because she is my best friend but as I said before she brushed me off, as she did back then. Back in the eighth grade she hardly talked to anyone other than him. They acted like they were the only two in the world ignoring everyone else and it was so damn annoying.

I felt that same annoying feeling today that I did back then and I haven't felt that feeling in a long time.

I remember the first time I met her. I moved to this town in the eighth grade. We don't get a lot of new people around here so immediately everyone became interested in the new kid and I got myself a lot of friends right away.

I remember Lena welcoming me to their class once, but after that, she never really spoke to me much. Instead, she spent her time around this weird kid that everyone wanted to pick on all the time. By association, the other kids alienated her too. When I asked Prim why all the others were so mean to them she informed me that it was really those two's choices if they were accepted by everyone or not.

At twelve years old I had no clue what that meant. Why would anyone choose to be excluded?

"You know the others wouldn't pick on you so much if you started to hang out with me instead," I offered to Lena one day once school was over.

Lena hesitated thinking for a long time, "who's picking on me?"

"Uh, well," I stuttered. Has she not noticed that everyone purposely excludes her? "Everyone," I finally answered timidly.

"Everyone? I thought we were all good friends."

"Lena," the boy who everyone picked on called out to her, "let's start walking home!"

She grabbed her backpack putting it on. "Later Gabe, have a good weekend," she said with a smile. Almost like she forgot our entire encounter.

I remember standing there shocked. This girl is...

"Plain stupid," Prim answered dully when I told her about Lena and I's conversation.

"If only she didn't hangout around that guy so much," I huffed.

"Then who should she hangout with?"

"You, me, and the others."

"And what makes us better than him?"

"Lots of things," I pondered for a second, "for starters were cooler."

Prim sighed disappointed, "then you should tell her that."

"I just told you I already tried."

"Well then try again."

So I did. I tried that whole school year to get Lena to hang out with us. I tried so hard that Prim told me it was almost amusing the dumb ways I would get turned down.

One night, near the middle of Summer, almost everyone in town was at the annual carnival. I was hanging out with Prim and the others as usual when I saw Lena standing there by herself.

I approached asking if she wanted to go through the haunted house with us, she looked around for a moment before finally agreeing. She held my hand out of fear the whole way through. I think she forgot to let go because we were still holding hands until we parted ways that night.

"I think I love her," I told Prim as we were walking home.

"I already knew that," Prim answered dully.

"Why didn't you tell me then?"

"Because it's not my job to tell you what you already knew too," she opened the door and entered her house leaving me alone in the summer air.

From then on Lena stopped hanging around that strange boy and started to hang with us. I never knew the reason why they fell out and stopped talking but I didn't really care because now she was by my side.

But today she felt so out of reach.

The bell rings telling us to go to our next period. I hop up following Prim and Lena out of the classroom.

"Gabe, can I talk to you for a moment?" Ms. White asks, stopping me.

I watch as the two walk out of the room leaving me behind.

"Yeah?"

"How did I do today?" She asks nervously.

I laugh, "why are you asking me?"

"I don't know because I trust your opinion."

"To be honest I wasn't really listening."

"Right, I thought so." Ms. White sighs leaning against the chalkboard, "it didn't seem like anyone was paying attention today. Man and I thought it would be easy teaching highschoolers."

"Don't worry you'll get it eventually," I tell her, starting to walk out of the classroom.

"Oh, can you and Alexa help me put up some more decorations in my class after school today?"

"I can't. I have soccer practice again, remember?"

She rushes to the door frame calling out to me as I continue to walk down the hall, "then tomorrow morning?"

"Sure, I'll text her!" I exclaim walking further down the hall.

"Thanks!" She calls out entering back inside her class as the next set of students walks in.

I can always spot Prim from a mile away. To any outsider, it may seem like she looks like any other girl in this school but to me, her intimidating and dispassionate demeanor radiates like a chemical plant so I know exactly where she is and when she is nearby.

I run to catch up to her.

"Do you feel off today?" I question.

She jumps a little before relaxing seeing that it's just me, "you can't sneak up like that on a girl."

"How did I even sneak up on you?"

"You got to say 'hey Prim' or 'behind you' or something like that before you jump into a conversation."

"I thought you hated time-wasters like that."

"I do but I hate being snuck on so waste my time as quickly as you can."

"Okay," I roll my eyes, "hey Prim," I start again, "do you feel off today?"

"You felt it too?" She asks, turning the corner, I quickly follow her as we continue to walk down the hall. "I did feel off for a little while but it faded away quickly and I just got bored again."

"Of course you did." Any feeling that Prim may have doesn't linger for long. It's not like she's emotionless just...maybe a little more composed than the rest of us. Nothing throws her off. I like to think of it as maturity.

We wait outside of a classroom which I am assuming is her next, "is that all?" She leans against a random locker waiting for permission for this conversation to over so she can walk away.

"Did you feel her slipping away?" I ask, getting to the point.

"Who Lena?"

"Yeah. Did you feel like she was slipping away from us again?"

Prim laughs almost amused, "aw Gabe. That was funny but I think you forget I'm not obsessed with Lena like you are." She reads my sole expression, "look I don't need to tell you something you already know, remember? If you feel her slipping away you need to tell her how you really feel. If you love her don't tell me." Prim enters her class not engaging in any further conversation with me.

Prim is right as usual. No matter how many years I've gone without telling her those three words never fade away. I still feel them in my heart I felt them ever since the day she welcomed me to Ms. White's eighth-grade class. And now that she's slipping away, more than ever I need to tell her.

My only hope is that she'll feel the same way.