Bonus: Seo Yeon

I woke up in the morning irritated and upset. I could hardly sleep last night with no answers still for what took place last night. But I had other things to think about. I knew the Nam's were about to head into the palace so I waited in my room until after they had their breakfast. I was in a rather petty mood today and decided to wear more makeup and perfume than usual and parade myself around him like a spoilt child to try to get a rise out of him. Despite everything I couldn't let my personal feelings destroy our bond, I will always need him and trust him no matter what. And if I had to act like a fool to distract myself from him then so be it.
 Nam Jeon was the first to leave. I know Seon-Ho didn't like to arrive in the palace with his father so I placed myself to make sure to cross the courtyard as he made his way to work a few minutes later. My heart skipped a beat still when I saw him walk out of the house. Dammit; why couldn't I just hate him and move on like a normal person? Did I still have to like him? And did he always have to stay so good looking? I prayed under my breath that he would have a bad day at work and come home covered in dirt so I could see him looking ugly, even if it was just the one time. Then maybe my feelings would get a hint and I could get over this already.



My plan seemed to have worked as he stopped dead in his tracks as I strutted before him to make my way to the kitchen. I had my heart in my mouth as I prayed he wouldn't stop me like he did yesterday; I could still feel the imprint of his big hands wrapping itself around my whole arm. I dared to look up at him and give him a small nod before walking inside and I saw him stare at me again just as intensely as last night. It was unexpected that I froze for a second. It seemed like an age passed us by before one of the maids spotted me and called out for me, breaking us from our trance. He looked up and down at me, his eyes widened and he gave me a small smirk before leaving.


I didn't have time to think about it though, I was getting late for my new job that my old neighbour helped me find. I ran to the back entrance of the house where the guards were too busy drinking to notice me and I climbed the small tree planted next to the wall, hoping the liquid I got from the doctor I put in their drinks took effect quickly and they would be asleep like babies in no time.


I climbed over the wall and practically fell into Hwi’s arms, who was waiting to take me to work. I wanted to keep him out of this as much as possible, but I noticed my brother following me on my days out and I completely caved. He could be intelligent when he wanted to be, and I missed him more than he could have possibly imagined. I gave in and I met him in our old home where he looked like he was all skin and bones and we have found ways to be in touch ever since after Seon-Ho took me to the marketplace.We walked hand in hand in the market just before my job started and I went with him to all the market stalls I got my clothes and jewellery from, bought it with the gold I got from the Nam's and gave it to him to give to the girl I asked him to find to play as my double on my days out. I knew he was upset with me starting work but he couldn't say much, he knew I couldn't just stay at the Nam's and do nothing. I needed a major distraction and he knew it. He then dropped me off at the house where I was to work as a maid for an upper-class family like the Nam's.



The family was just as ostentatious as any other noble couple i had come across and just as emotionless as Nam-Jeon was. This was my very first time seeing what Seon-Ho's childhood could potentially be like, and i hated it. Despite the illness poverty and absence of my parents, my father adored us and spent every free moment he had with us. He fed us, bathed and dressed us with his own hands. He spent every silver he had on us and he hardly let us out of his sight when he was home. But the children in this family had no emotional attachment to their parents at all, and it wasn't like they had any choice in the matter. The rich parent's were forever being called out for some social occasion or another; leaving the children on their own entirely.
 I wasn't as naive as i always made myself out to be, in fact it was the only ladylike behaviour that i knew since i grew up without a mother for my entire life. I knew that my father's parenting was completely unique to a nation that only cared about individual success. My father never passed us off onto others whilst he was out working, he had never even entertained the idea of remarrying just for our sake and he always made time to teach us personally. The affection that i had for my father was almost unmatched since women in most households despite their social and economical backgrounds were seen as useless, whereas my father totally encouraged my studies, my social behaviour and to look after my big brother whilst he was gone.





In one such case, i personally witnessed the deterioration the condition of the eldest son and daughter in the family that i worked for. And for some reason, they reminded me so much of myself and Seon-Ho. The eldest daughter was a bright young child who could have far succeeded any boy that had ever attended school. And yet she was constantly put under pressure to just stay silent, work on her female skills and not constantly overshadow her brother, who was not as academic as she was. In fact, he was pretty much being ripped apart for not being good enough in anything when he was just making minor mistakes because was being constantly put under pressure. In fact, this father and son dynamic wasn't' far from the relationship that Seon-Ho had with his father. And it was only then when i realised that no matter how Seon-Ho treated me, he did always shield me from the ugly matters that took place in his household around me. He did protect me and i guess that under his father's constant 'supervision', i couldn't really blame him for anything at all.
 The scenario was still heavy on my mind when I walked home in a complete daze and I didn’t even realise that Seon-Ho was actually waiting for me outside of my quarters with a very nasty look on his face. I couldn’t help but to recoil a little at this, but I had no choice but to keep up my naive act. I tried to walk past him, but he just wasn’t having it at all. 



“And just where the hell have you been?” “What are you talking about? Where else can I be?” “I looked all over the place for you.” “So maybe you didn’t look hard enough.” I really was not in the mood for any of this; I just really needed to go to bed and think about exactly what I had been exposed to since waking up here, which was not what I was expecting at all. But I underestimated how angry he really was at me, to the point where he grabbed me by my arm, took me inside my room and really pinned me against the paper windows before I even had a chance to light up a candle. We were both completely in the dark and so close to each other, it really was an unusual situation. But I had to trust the fact that he would never hurt me, no matter how angry he was. And the fact alone gave me so much more confidence to face him and look him straight in the face when I did it, which he certainly was not expecting. 


“What do you want from me? Why are you blowing up at me like this? Don’t you usually ignore me anyways? Don’t you always to go the brothel before coming back home after doing god only knows what? So you can wonder around, but I cannot?” I could only count my blessings for not seeing his reaction since we were still in the dark, but he still refused to leave. In fact, he actually got closer to me to where I could feel his nose upon mine and his hands very inappropriately running down my arms. “What are you saying?” “Why are you waiting around for me, almost a year later after I woke up here and not straight away when I needed you the most? Why did you just abandon me as soon as you told me the bare minimum about my memories and start visiting other women when I needed you here by my side! There is such a big hole in my life and in my world and you never helped me! I am even locked up in this place and only allowed out once a month and even then, I am still alone! On my own! So I do not have to answer to you for anything! Now go be with those girls who are apparently far more important to you than I ever have been in your life!”



I really was not the type of woman to get emotional in front of anyone, even my own brother hadn’t seen me cry ever since our parents passed away. I had done my very best to do what I always do and push my own pain away and focus on the most two important men in my life, but I was failing for the first time and there was nothing I could do about it. It was the way he was treating me now, like I was a possession of his that was completely undoing me. Never in my entire life did I ever think a man could see me as a woman in my condition, especially the man who had witnessed my fits almost every week for a decade. Never did I even think I could ever feel a man’s touch, and now here I was in the most awkward circumstances and in the arms of the man that I never thought would look at me twice. 


“Do you…honestly think that I would do this to you on purpose? I am really trying…to be civil but it isn’t easy for me either. There are so many things…too many things I want to tell you. But I cannot. I can just only hope that you can be patient with me…” “Why should I wait for a day that will never come?” “…and as long as you want me to stay away from other women…” “Seon-Ho…” “…I will.” “Wait, what? What did you say?” “As long as you tell me in your own words that you want me to stay away from other women, then I will, I promise you. You only have to say it and I promise you that I will do anything you want me to.”
 Why? Why was he doing this to me? What on earth was happening? I couldn’t even see his face so I had no idea if he was even being serious or not. And what the hell was I supposed to do now when all I could think about was my brother? And as for Seon-Ho himself…if I rejected him then he would make my life more than a living hell than it already was. And if I accepted this new…friendship, then it would only blow up in my face later and misconstrued when the truth came out. He might even think I was using him to set my brother free…what was I supposed to do?