Nice conversation with a stranger

The ride became smooth. The voice is gone and we became quiet until we reach the destination of his so-called 'special place.'

He even gave me bottled water without saying anything. He parks in front of a white fence and turns off the engine of the car. He gets out and I didn't even know that he will open the door for me.

“Get out of the car, now.”

Quietly I get out of the car and I feel the wind blew on my face. There are so many trees and I'm right to think that when I get out of the car the fresh wind will be relaxing.

I check my surroundings and wonder who is the owner of this land? It's full of tall trees and grass. Also, there's a long white fence that covers the other side of the land. There's no house or anything like that. There's no one here beside me and him.

I look at the guy who helps me calm down earlier. And he goes to the back of his car and opens the compartment. He took off his clothes and immediately I look away.

I can feel my cheeks burning up. What is wrong with me?

I can see men's bodies all the time because of my brothers. Or does it count when it's your family?

How about one time when I saw Sean and Dominic while they're changing their uniforms in the coffee shop? Because they forgot to close the door? Does it count for something?

While I'm lost in my thoughts, I felt a finger on my left shoulder.

“Follow me, we'll talk over there," he starts to walk leaving me behind.

I followed him and the wind blew strong that I can smell the grass, trees all at once. I close my eyes and try to feel the wind brushing through my skin. This is so nice.

We arrived at a giant tree whose trunk is quite huge or more like it's been here for almost who knows how many years. And it is still standing. The tree is making it easy for us and shading us from the sun. I didn't even know that there are still trees like these that can standstill after the age of time. I look up and I'm glad to see the shadows of the leaves are in my face. It's like I'm inside a beautiful fairy tale and this is a different dimension. When nothing matters, and you feel like you have all the time in the world.

I am feeling the light breeze and the freshness of the air. It's so nice to feel this way. I am not rushing into anything. I am here in this quiet place that I didn't know that will make me calm and alive. If I have this kind of place all to myself, I'll never leave.

I'm imagining that there's this guy who likes simple things like me. We're having a picnic here and just talking about some stuff about our lives. We're happy and just having a nice meal that I made. Because I love to cook. After that, we're reading some books. And for the first time in my life, I like the quietness. Because he's with me. But then it ended.

My calm and nice thoughts stop when someone halts from walking. I almost bump my head on his back. When he faces me, I can say that he can be the guy I'm imagining. But my fantasies stops when he opens his mouth.

“Why did you insult me earlier? Do you even know who I am?"

I don't know what to say after what he said. I forgot just for a minute that I'm with this guy. He is now wearing a black polo shirt with a collar and jeans. I look down and see black sneakers. I wish I knew what brand it is so I can buy some for my elder brother Drew. I'll try to ask him about that. When I look at him, he is quite handsome. And I must say he is tall. But not as tall as my eldest brother Vince.

"Are you just going to stare and not answer my question?" he said with annoyance in his voice.

"You know, I should be the one asking questions here," I look up to him and put my right on my waist. And I furrow my brows.

"Why did you bring me here with you?"

"Answer my questions first," he said in a serious tone.

"Why did you insult me earlier?"

I try to look at the gentle side he has when he was asking me if I was okay. Or why did I cry. That guy is gone. This man in front of me is completely a different person.

"Why are you still stuck on that question?"

"Because you offended someone. Me."

"Why should I apologize for telling the truth?"

I saw the expression on his face that he wants to remain calm. But because of what I said, he's getting angry. I can see his ears are red and it's like a volcano is going to explode.

"Is it that hard for you to apologize?"

"Again, why should I apologize. What did I say that offended you?"

He closes his eyes and touches his forehead like in a desperate situation and can't calm down.

"Are you dumb? You didn't even know what you did?"

It's like my ears are on high alert because of what he said. Dumb? Me? How dare he! I'll make him pay for that. I will not apologize.

"I'm not dumb! You're an idiot for bringing me here." I look at him seriously without breaking eye contact. I would not back down. He is the one insulting me right now.

“Two strikes, one more and you’ll get it,” he said in a threatening tone.

It's like I'm having a conversation with a child. Not one of us is willing to back down. Talking to him is quite exhausting. I sat on the grass and turn my back on him. I want to relax for a bit. I didn't do any work but I felt weak for a

"Don't you dare turn your back on me! We're not finished-"

"Will you try to relax? I'm not going anywhere," I spread my arms and feel the fresh air. This is so nice. I'm intending to apologize to him. But because of his attitude, I'll put it on hold. He is easy to get mad and I like teasing him a bit.

I look at him. "Sit. Maybe after you'll be able to calm down." I pat the grass a little a gesture for him to sit down.

"I don't want to," he said without hesitation.

"Fine, suit yourself."

I just look at all the trees and grass. Even if it's quiet, I don't hear that voice. Even if I'm just sitting here, being shaded by a beautiful huge tree, I felt at peace. Maybe coming with this nerd guy is not so bad at all.

My eyes grew wider when he sits in front of me. In surprise, I push him hard and now he is sitting on the ground.

"What the fuck was that for?"

I was startled because his face was so close to mine. Immediately I stand up to help him get up. But he is standing up on his own while taking off the dirt on his shirt and pants.

"Hey! Don't cuss, it's not good when you say things like that."

"I'll say what I want to say. You ruined my shirt and pants. Why did you push me?" he said irritated.

"It's not even dirty. You are just making a big deal out of it," I said while my left hand is on my waist.

He closes his eyes in disbelief and puts his left hand on his hair. I can see that any minute now he will get angry at me. I know because I've been dealing with this kind of behavior all my life.

And I was right. He walks towards me. I took a step back because of his intense gaze.

“You are wasting my time. Is it hard for you to apologize?”

Honestly, it's not that hard. But because he is asking me to apologize, the more I don't want to do it. One of the things I hate the most is someone asking me to do anything. I know what I said earlier, and I knew I'll be in trouble. He should apologize first for what he did. I'm not going to do what he wants.

Instead of answering him, I walk away from him. I have work to do and he was the one who drove me here even if I don't want to. I don't know what time it is and if I can still make it to my second job. What is Rick thinking right now? Is he mad at me? What are my co-workers doing right now? What am I going to do? How will I get out of here? I don't want to be with this jerk anymore.

Someone grabs my left arm and now I'm looking at him.

"Don't make me chase you. You're not even beautiful."

I raise an eyebrow. "You're not handsome. So, stop being cocky."

I didn't even know that will come out of my mouth. I can't take it back might as well deal with this guy.

I saw his exasperated face. “Can you just apologize already? So, we can go our separate ways?”

I don't want to admit it. But he is right this time. Why am I even taking my time to apologize to him? At first, I just want to tease him a bit. He gets annoyed easily. He looks-

Because I like him. I am the one keeping him here. He’s my type.

No. The voice is back. Why? How did that happen again? I felt a sudden pain in my right temple.

He’s hot. Why don’t you let me out and I’ll introduce myself?

I thought that one day I can find someone who can help me get rid of this thing. I thought that maybe, just maybe, this guy is the answer to all my problems. But I was wrong. So wrong.

I look away and he let go of my arm. "Fine. Let's go back to the tree and we can talk there," I walk past him because my head is hurting.

You are such a killjoy! At least let me run my fingers through his gorgeous body.

I didn't hear him reply and I just heard that he is walking behind me. The voice is still pestering me, but I try my best to ignore it as long as I can.

When we reach the tree, immediately I sat down and lay down my back on the trunk. I also gesture the guy to sit down so he will be comfortable. I'm quite surprised that he didn't say anything and quietly sat down beside me. Well not exactly, we have a distance between us maybe 1 meter or less.

“So what? Are we just going to stare in the field and never talk about the issue at hand?”

"You know? You don't know how to relax. Why don't you just enjoy how peaceful this place is?" I said while looking at the field of grass, trees and taking a deep breath.

"I don't have time to relax. Just apologize and we'll go our separate ways."

I can see in my peripheral vision that he is looking at me. I became uneasy but I didn't let it show.

"If you apologize first, then maybe I'll do what you said," I close my eyes again and try to calm my mind. And I was glad that I can't hear the voice anymore. I did it. I did it on my own. It left. I smile and maybe right now I look stupid, but I don't care.

"Why do you keep closing your eyes and spreading your arms? You look stupid. You've been doing that for who knows how long," he said still looking at me.

I try to not get mad at what he said. Because I know he may notice what I've been doing since we got here.

I look at him and point my right index finger in his face. "I'll let it slide that you call me stupid," and look away just staring at the beautiful view in front of me. The wind is continuously blowing the leaves on the trees, this quiet scenery, just sitting here with a stranger I barely knew. But at least he's honest. He's not pretending to be nice.

"I just can't believe that there's still a place like this that still exists. All I can see every day are buildings, restaurants, cars, and noise from vehicles, people rushing to go to work. It's nice to slow down once in a while. It's nice to have a quiet time like this."

Since I decided to have three jobs, I didn't have a vacation. I didn't slow down, even if my body wants to give up, my mind is fighting. Sometimes, my boss, Rick will tell me to go on vacation. But I always tell him that I'm saving up for something important. My other boss, Chris will invite me to a vacation out of town. I always said 'next time.' And until now, the out-of-town vacation is still on hold.

"Maybe for some people, this thing is not a big deal. But for me, it is. It's important to me. So, thanks anyway for bringing me here. At least I get to experience some fresh air," I smile without pretensions. A smile that I rarely let anybody see. Even if I'm not looking at him, I know he saw me smiled.

I stretch my legs for a bit and slowly face him. This guy who I thought will ruin my day but manage to make up for it by bringing me here. This stranger comforts me a little earlier. This guy is arrogant, stubborn, rude but there's kindness inside of him. I know it. Maybe he's just like me. We rarely show our kindness to anyone especially a stranger.

When I turn to look at him, I thought that he will just continue looking at the fields of green in front of us. But he looks me in my eyes.

I took a deep breath before talking because I have a lot to say.

"I'm sorry if I insulted you earlier this morning. I was surprised by my co-worker Aimee's reaction when she saw you. She can't get over you. I've never met a celebrity in my whole life. So, I don't know how she feels," I look down a bit because he doesn't take his eyes off me.

I became conscious of how I look right now. I have to finish what I am saying right now. Focus, Jedielle!

"I'm sorry if I offended you in any way," I gather my courage to look at him in his eyes. "The truth is I don't know who you are. There are a lot of celebrities that are famous right now that I still don't know. I don't have time to watch TV or even have what they call social media account." I bit my lower lip because of the way he is looking at me. I don't know what he is thinking and he is just quiet there, in front of me. Listening to my long speech of apology. I hope I can end this right now. Because there's something inside me, a feeling, that I'm afraid to feel.

"I have three jobs and I'm always exhausted when I come home. I'm sorry if I told you something that might have offended you. I didn't mean it. Again, I'm sorry."

I did not have to tell him that I have three jobs. It just came out of my mouth. I am waiting for his reply or anything. But he just looks away from me and silent for a minute.

I didn't quite catch his name when we go outside the coffee shop. Because I was busy trying to get out of his grip on my arm. And I was occupied out of anger for him.

"I didn't get to know your name," I said still looking at him.

"Zander," he plainly said.

"I mean your whole name," I insist.

He looks at me a bit. "I won't tell you," and then looks away again. He is like a child.

"How selfish of you. It's just a name. You think you're that famous?" I put both my hands on my waist.

"Yes, I am," he proudly says and looks at me.

"Oh really? If you're famous, why didn't I know you?" I said teasing him.

I thought that he will get angry again. But his expression softens it's more like a sigh of relief. When I look at him, his eyelashes are quite long, his eyebrows are not that thick, and his lips are what I always hear from Aimee when she saw her crushes, kissable. Maybe he doesn't drink or smoke. Good for him. His nose bridge is quite long. His jawline is quite manly for his age. I don't even know how old is he and I will not ask any more questions about him.

“It’s okay that you don’t even know me. At least we can have a conversation without interference," he said still not looking at me. Do I have something on my face that he doesn't want to see? Why am I even bothered about that?

I look away from him, stretch my legs on the grass and let both my hands on the ground as support on my position.

"It's your turn now," I said to Zander. I know his name now. He doesn't want to tell me the rest of it. But it's okay. Now I'll not name him on my mind a 'jerk' or 'nerd.'

I saw on my peripheral eye that he furrows his brows. "What do you mean?"

I look at him. "It's your turn to apologize to me," it may sound that I'm insisting him to do that. But I deserve an apology.

“And why should I apologize to you? I didn’t even insult you,” he said that casually without even blinking. As he looks at me.

My apology to him was long and I meant every word. And now his turn to say something to me, he doesn't even care? I don't want to get mad but it might start soon.

"You drag me without my permission and grip my arm so tight that I thought it will break," I furrow my brows. "You even cussed. My parents didn't even cuss at me and how dare you say that?" I said quite irritated.

I think that I'll age easily while talking to him. Okay, I admit we're both stubborn. It will be a long talk before he will apologize. I'm sure of it.

“I didn’t say that bad word towards you. And besides, you pushed me. That’s why I said that." He said blatantly. What a jerk!

"Is it hard for you to apologize? You're unfair! I apologize for what I said and meant every word. And now, it's your turn to say 'I'm sorry,' and you're not going to say it?"

I have to give myself credit for speaking too long with a guy. I've never spoken this much especially with a stranger even though I know his name. My words are limited and I've never become this angry with a guy. He is the first one I've spoken to in years. My co-workers don't count because it's a given that I have to speak with them. What I mean is this moment, two strangers who are quite alike, sitting in a quiet place with no one in sight. Just having a conversation that isn't going to end soon. And most of all, no one wants to back down.

“Stop pouting, it’s not good for you. You look like a blowfish," he says nonchalantly.

And I feel like my blood is rushing through my skin. I didn't know what faces I'm making in front of him. Because I'm desperate to get out of this situation and the flow of our conversation tells me we're not leaving any time soon.

Does he like insults? Well, I have a lot to say to him.

"It's okay. You look like a dugong," I said smiling at him.

His eyes grew wider and suddenly our situation changes. He's now the one who looks irritated. And I feel like I won.

"What did you say? And whose dugong?"

I want to laugh because if he saw that, he will get so angry.

"Can you see? We're both stubborn. No one wants to give way," I move my shoulders a bit and he is still sitting while crossing his arms.

"We will not go anywhere with our conversation like this if no one is willing to pave the way. Why don’t you apologize to me already? So, we can go our separate ways?”

He moves his head and shoulders like he's doing that to calm himself. Or is it just my observation?

“When will you stop talking?”

"Uhm... maybe if you apologize? Maybe try to use your common sense," I said teasingly.

He lets out a sigh and I am anticipating what he will say next.

“You are quite a talker. Do you ever shut up?”

I thought he will apologize already but all he gives me is pieces. Tiny bit pieces of conversation. But it's not quite bad actually. He's not intruding or anything. And I want to thank him for earlier when we're inside his car. I felt at peace just a little. I felt a warmth inside me.

“I’ll shut up if you start talking and stop stalling," I look away from him and just stare at the wonderful plants in front of me.

“I am not stalling. I just…” He looks up at the sky and closes his eyes for a moment. And let out another sigh. I can't help myself but take a quick peek at him. He looks tired, I can tell. From the moment we came here, I observe his body language. I'm a keen observer. I can see through his stubbornness, arrogant personality that he is just frustrated at the moment. Like there's something that bothers him. And he doesn't know where to put his emotions. It's overwhelming him.

“I just want a break from my work. It’s quite exhausting when I’m always in the spotlight. They always judge me before they even knew me. I am so tired of it all," He sounds defeated. His voice becomes soft and calm. And you can hear the sincerity from his words.

I don't know if I should be surprised that he's opening up to me or be glad that he's not being arrogant towards me. It's nice to see this side of him.

“You asked me why did I bring you here? I just thought that maybe I can trust a stranger," He looks at me and I can't help but look at him.

"And because even though you insulted me, at least you’re honest. You say it to my face what you think of me instead of sugarcoating your words.”

I was taken aback when he said he can trust me. How many years has it been? When all I hear are judgments and mean things about me? How many years have passed? Since someone told me he trusts me. My emotions are all over the place and I try to contain my smile.

“I like your honesty. It’s quite annoying at first but you say what you truly feel. Thanks,” he shows me his smile. A genuine one.

I just look at him and I can't utter any word. I'm looking through my mind what I should say next. Because I was mesmerized by his gaze. When he looks at you, his attention is focused on you. He is like looking through my soul and I felt my cheeks heat up.

I look away because I'm afraid of what is slowly starting inside me. I don't like it.

"I thought that you never smile. You should do it often," My eyes are wandering and I don't know where should I look. Because if I look straight ahead, he can see that I am fidgeting.

“Tsk. I won’t do it again," And he's back to his old self. It's like he has an on and off switch of his mood. Who am I to judge?

After a minute, we just stare straight ahead. Just letting the silence engulfs us. I took a deep breath and he did the same. We look at each other and both laugh. The tension between us earlier is now gone.

"Again, I'm sorry for what I said," I took a peek at him but I'm afraid to catch his gaze so immediately I look away.

“Just don’t do it again. And by the way, it was just a disguise for people to not know me. Even though you don’t know anything about me, I’m quite famous you know," he said proudly. I just let him be.

"Yeah yeah, you're famous. I get it." I dismiss him.

We fell silent again after. How many times I've told myself that I'm glad? Glad that he is with me. Happy because of him the voice is gone, at least for now. This is the first time this year that I've come to like this silence. And I want to thank him because he doesn't know that he helped me. He helps me fight that voice in my head.

But I'm afraid he will never know about it. 'Cause I know this is the first and last time we're going to see each other. I need to make sure of it.

“Sorry for what I did to you earlier. And I accept your apology," he said breaking the ice between us.

I'm waiting for him to continues what he is saying but he remains silent after.

I raise an eyebrow. "So, that's it? That's your apology?" I said eyeing him but he didn't budge.

“Tsk. Never mind.”

In the minutes or hour that I spent with him, slowly, little by little, I can tell his personality. Or I know what he will say next. And from the looks of it, he will not say something anymore.

"Unfair! My apology was way better than you," I manage to look at him. "You should have prepared a long speech. I deserve more than that!"

He stands up and looks down on me. "You're so demanding. I won't apologize for the second time. Suit yourself."

After what he said he runs leaving me behind. I saw his smile. And I have this urge to run too. So, I stand up and chase him but I can't catch up to him. His legs are long and while chasing him I yell 'your apologies suck' and he is still running away from me.

He has a playful side to him that I saw while chasing him. He lets out his tongue teasing me that he won't do what I'm saying.

But it's okay. What I'm seeing right now is a raw version of him.

No cameras, no script, no character that he needs to portray. Just him. The ordinary version of him.

He has a kind side to him that he doesn't anyone to see. I can feel it because we're the same.

And now, it's like I have this feeling that I want to know more about him.