Episode 5. When It Rains, It Pours

Tomo had taken the risk of continuing the show from the previous day as it aired overnight. Once he began watching it, he didn’t really want to stop, yet he understood how risky it was to continue.

If Ichirou found him, he’d surely think Tomo was disgusting. A quiet voice inside his head pointed out that his stepfather knew a lot about the show, yet he told himself it was likely coincidence and Tomo was just being silly.

He hadn’t gotten out of his pyjamas yet, but usually Ichirou wouldn’t wake up just yet, and Tomo planned on returning to his room before the man woke up.

The ringing of the doorbell was sharp in the still morning quiet, and it felt like his heart had skipped several beats and a rock had shot into his throat from his chest. He turned to stare in the direction of the front door, frozen in place.

Who rang the doorbell at five in the morning on a Sunday?

He unfroze at the second ring, and tried to decide what to do. If he went to open the door, he might show his clothes to a stranger. If he didn’t make it stop, everyone would wake up.

He’d have to open the door.

Standing up, he felt a weight on his shoulder. A chill crept down his spine while goosebumps covered his skin. He turned to see the man he had wanted to avoid at all costs.

The usually carefully placed hair was a mess and while the man had put a hanten over his pyjamas, some shirt buttons were open and he looked far from the carefully groomed man Tomo was used to seeing.

It made him even more afraid.

“You can sit down, Tomo-kun.”

He pulled the blanket tighter around him, as he saw the man leave to open the door.

Tomo turned to the TV and quickly turned it off, hoping that his stepfather hadn’t quite gotten the sleep out of his eyes yet.

There was a third ringing of the bell before Tomo heard the door unlock.

“Wha—”

“Is Tomo-chan all right?!”

“Sorry about the trouble, Ichirou-san. Kenta, he—”

“Is Tomo in his room? Is he fine? He’s not at the hospital, is he?”

“I’m fine, Ken!”

There was the sound of hurried steps on the wooden floor.

“Kenta, where are you going? It was from the living room. Not that way you doofus.”

He could understand how tired Kouta must be after Ken forced him to drive to the Seki-Momoi house in a different city than they both lived in.

“Hey! What ar—”

The steps got closer and Tomo turned to see Ken drag his older brother with him. Following was Ichirou, who looked confused.

Ken released Kouta as soon as he saw Tomo and ran up to him.

“You’re really alright? You’re not hurt anywhere? Do you need to see a doctor? You’re really not sick? We can go to the hospital right away. I’ve already checked which hospitals are open.”

The eyelids were red and slightly puffy, and Ken’s brown eyes studied Tomo with such worry, he felt bad for the boy.

“I really am fine, Ken.”

He put his hand against the anxious visitor’s cheek, feeling the remnants of tears that Ken just moments earlier must have dried. Ken put his forehead against Tomo’s, holding his shoulders gently, noticeably trembling.

“Really?” he whispered.

“Really.” He smiled and rubbed Ken’s cheek with his thumb. “You could have come later. Do you know what time it is?”

“That’s exactly what I asked this moron. It was my day off but I had to work all day and then he has the nerve to wake me up at three telling me to drive here.”

“But Chika said Tomo-chan was sick!”

Ken looked so fragile while he shouted at his older brother and Kouta’s annoyed expression softened a little.

“Everyone gets sick, Ken. If you were that worried you should have just called me.”

Ken’s facial expression changed and after a moment he said:

“Oh.” He laughed quietly as he rubbed his forehead against Tomo’s. “You’re right. I’m so silly. ”

“Excuse me…”

In a moment, his airways tightened, and he couldn’t breathe. Ken let go of him and took several steps backwards, glancing at his brother.

“Tomo-kun, don’t you and Yamada-kun usually act a little more… distant?”

“They’re always like this. Oh, I’m that moron’s, I mean, Kenta’s older brother. I’m sorry I haven’t mentioned it previously. I never truly got the right time for it.”

Despite trying to sound polite, Kouta sounded hostile, yet Ichirou smiled in return.

“I see.”

“Kouta, since it’s my fault, you can sleep in my bed. That should do, right?”

“Thanks Tomoki,” the sleep-deprived man said. “Same room?”

He nodded.

As Kouta left to get much needed sleep, Tomo turned to Ken who studied him from top to bottom.

“Tomo-chan, is this… fine…?”

Tomo tilted his head in confusion. “What?”

Ken pointed at Tomo’s face, then his body. Confused, Tomo looked down. He froze, his mind wailing and screeching at him. The nausea hit before he even reacted to the anxiety and he covered his mouth and crouched down trying to calm down, but to no avail.

He had forgotten what he was wearing.

This was really the end of everything he had worked so hard for.

He really had ruined his mother’s second marriage, hadn’t he?

***

On the TV a commercial aired, later followed by the morning news.Ken was snoozing on the longer side of the corner sofa, looking somewhat uncomfortable as he didn’t quite have enough space to stretch out. Ichirou sat on the other end.

He was patting Tomo’s head as absentmindedly after having made Tomo lay down, but with Ken on one end and Ichirou at the other, he had only had enough space if he laid with his head on Ichirou’s thigh.

Had he had a choice, he would have chosen someone else’s thigh, but knowing how worried Ken had been, he didn’t have the heart to wake him up, nor did he feel he had the right to decline, having caused Ichirou problems so early in the morning.

Instead, he had surrendered to the circumstances and watched the rest of the show’s season together with Ichirou (and Ken, until he fell asleep).

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Go ahead.”

“When did you find out?”

The pats stopped, and Tomo looked up at the man.

“To be perfectly honest, I know very little. You didn’t want to tell me, so what right do I have to investigate it? I know I’m an outsider who came into your life as suddenly as I moved in and the marriage happened.”

“I wouldn’t call you an outsider…”

“Yet I’m not an integrated part of your family.” Ichirou gave him another pat. “But that’s all right. I respected your choice in hope of some day being told. It doesn’t change that I did notice a few things.”

The man was quiet for a moment before he turned off the TV and took his mug of coffee from the table. Tomo admired every movement as, despite all that had transpired, they were as graceful as the man was calm about it all.

“It wasn’t difficult to understand that your sister woke up in the morning for your sake. While you’ve gotten it under control these days, you used to get restless watching the show. You’d make twitching motions, make small bounces, and completely forget what you were doing as you watched. Sometimes you still forget to eat. However, since you were so conscious of it, I chose not to mention it. Though I admit I enjoyed watching them myself. I used to watch any kind of super heroes when I was younger, and I chose my path because of those kinds of shows.”

“So… what Chika did was useless…”

“I wouldn’t say so. I used the opportunity to set a routine of eating together, did I not?” he chuckled.

“I suppose so…”

Thinking back on how it had been when he grew up, he felt a combination of exhaustion and relief and despite trying to hold them back, tears welled over.

“What’s wrong?”

He had worked so hard. Not just during the past four years to hide from Ichirou, but also to ensure he didn’t trouble his sisters and that his parents didn’t find him a bother. Ever since that day so many years ago when everything just changed overnight he had tried his hardest every day. He had taken over the chores from Chiyo. He had done Chika’s chores. He had taken the time to help his grandmother out. He had studied hard and even made it into a reputable school.

He was tired of always fighting against the current, and the tears wouldn’t stop.

“Why was I the one who had to make sure everyone had breakfast and woke up on time? Why did I have to go grocery shopping and meal plan? Who asks their ten-year-old to handle these things? Why wasn’t it Sawa? Or Chiyo? Why did my classmates tell me I was weird? Am I really that weird? It’s not like I purposely got blue eyes or looked girly. I don’t want to stand out. I just want to be like everyone else. So why did I become this way? Why does it hurt so much when I try to be like everyone else? Why did I have to cut my hair? Why is it wrong to have long hair? Why couldn’t I just become like everyone else?”

“I can’t answer most of your questions, but there is nothing wrong with being you, Tomo-kun. I assure you that. I’m certain that you’ve become who you are today because it was for the best. Life is a lottery, yet you can find a path suited for you to walk. One that will allow you to be you, while you can find a place in life that gives you more good than bad.”

The hand on his head moved in the direction toward Ken. Tomo looked at the brown-haired, unusually tall, teenager whose feet met his. He moved them, brushing them against Ken’s, feeling a little more comforted.

“I know, however, that you have wonderful friends. One of them would rush to your side whenever you may need him, as seen this morning. Fujita-san as well, surely, as he brought Yamada-kun here despite the circumstances. I have never agreed with Sawa-san’s way of handling situations regarding emotions. She means well, but can be awkward and do the opposite of what is good for her and others, though she also never listens to reason. I would hope you let me be the voice of reason when she isn’t and let me be a pillar of support. Though you need to let me know about your troubles first before I can do either, so hopefully it will be in another ten years or so.”

He took off his glasses and dried his tears with the sleeve as he laughed quietly.

“Ten years seems a bit much.”

“It took you four to get here. And just because we can talk like this now, doesn’t mean we will tomorrow. Nothing is quite that easy. So ten years seems like a reasonable amount of time to wait.”

Ken moved, taking Tomo’s attention for a moment, and he glanced in his direction. Seeing that he was still asleep, Tomo looked back up at the man he had known nothing about.

Ichirou was right. Ken would be there if he needed him, no matter the time of day.

“I guess I should have tried to open up earlier.”

“I wish you had, yes, but I don’t think you should have done so earlier. Doesn’t this weekend show you weren’t ready for it yet?”

He was quiet, and Ken stirred again.

“It seems your friend is waking up. I shall go prepare breakfast. You can keep laying down if you want to.”

“No, it’s fine. I’ll sit up. Or else Ken might have another scare.” He smiled as he sat up. He shivered as the man stood up.

“Are you cold? I can get something for you to wear.”

“Kouta’s sleeping in my room, though.”

Ichirou-san looked surprised at Tomo.

“I planned to get you something from what I washed yesterday.”

“Oh.” He looked away. “Since you already know things, whatever bad will happen regardless,” he mumbled.

Much like Sawa’s marriage being ruined.

“Tomo-kun, I don’t think there will be anything bad coming from letting me in on your secret.”

The house fell into a strange sort of silence, and Tomo looked at Ichirou, noticing the man studied him.

“What’s wrong?”

“Will you answer a question for me now?”

Tomo tilted his head. “I guess?”

“Whose is that hoodie, Tomo-kun? Please answer honestly this time. I know it’s neither your sisters nor Sakura-san’s.”

“Mine,” he muttered after some hesitation.

“Then that’s the one I’ll get for you.”

***

“So let me get things straight...”

Chika looked confused, frowning as she tried to wrap her head around the situation. She was sitting by the table in front of the TV with Sawa.

Meanwhile, Ken sat in her usual seat, occasionally poking Tomo’s feet and legs with his feet. He had shown no signs of amusement as he ate, but he also didn’t apologise, so Tomo assumed it was on purpose, but didn’t know why.

Kouta silently ate his breakfast in Sawa’s seat, where he usually sat when he stayed briefly for a cup of tea to talk to Sawa or catch up with Shouji if he coincidentally had come home.

“You—”

Tomo felt another poke and looked at Ken, who gave him a meaningful look.

“You’re so stupid, Chika. How hard is it to sit down and switch the channel back? You’re not watching anything.”

“Maybe I was about to?”

“On a Sunday morning? No way! Just switch the damn channel back, moron.”

“You’re the worst, Kenta! I’m not a moron!”

“Then switch the channel back, you stupid woman!”

Tomo poked Ken under the table, and he shot Tomo a smile in return.

“I’m switching it, okay? You’re such a jerk! See, now it’s changed. So shut up, okay? I’m not stupid, got that? I’m also in—”

“Sit down and shut up already!”

“Tomo-kun.”

He sucked in a breath in surprise when hearing Ichirou’s tone. It felt like he was being scolded, even if the man said nothing else. It had been a while since anyone scolded him, and Tomo looked down.

“Sorry,” he muttered.

Ken looked at him with a warm and gentle expression, chin in jaw while repeatedly moving his foot up and down by Tomo’s leg.

“I suppose I’ll look for them at my parents' home.”

“Excuse me?” Kouta asked.

“We had that series at home. Years of lack of use might have caused some damage, if we still have them, since I was around eight when my sister got the collector’s edition. Though I watched it more than she did.”

“Really?” Tomo tried to sound indifferent. “I guess I could watch it since I missed almost the entire third season and part of the second.”

Ichirou looked amused as he continued to eat his breakfast. Ken was shaking while covering his mouth.

“Does that mean you’ll see your mother? Tell her I said hello, Ichi.”

“Sure, Sawa-san.”

“But you’ve been watching this since yesterday…”

“It’s not like I can pause.”

Kouta sighed. “I’m glad you have found another space where you feel more at ease instead of being tense and anxious.” He offered Tomo a relieved smile, but then he sighed again. “I just wish you could relax this much at the café…”

“Niisan, wouldn’t you lose customers?”

“Hmm…” Kouta looked up the ceiling in thought before he looked down again. “Wouldn’t we just bring in a different kind? Besides, many love just chatting with Tomoki, so I think it’d be fine. Probably.”

“How can you run a business like that?”

“It’s all about taking risks you think are worth it and make them profitable,” Ichirou-san said with a smile.

Kouta nodded.

Ken looked at his brother with feigned horror. “I’d lose all the cute girls! There wouldn’t be any point in working!”

“Have you ever considered bisexuality, Kenta?” Kouta said with a smile.

“That’s not funny!”

“Ken-kun says he’ll make Momo-san fall for him all the time.”

Ken opened his mouth but closed it again before he stared into his grilled fish, eating tiny pieces of it.

“Kouta,” Sawa said, breaking the silence that had fallen. “I know Shouji said it was fine and I don’t doubt that, but I still don’t know what your business actually is…”

“Sawa-san, I hear it’s a café. Tomo-kun is apparently a waiter.”

Tomo turned to Kouta, who shook his head. He had said nothing.

“Naomichi-kun let me know. I first heard of Kouta-kun’s business when I talked with him about Tomo-kun’s allergies.”

“Does Tomo- have allergies?” she asked, looking confused. “Oh, maybe you’re right. There might have been something…”

“Sawa-san, don’t forget about your children’s allergies! I don’t want you to send him to the hospital!”

“Hasn’t it been fine until now?”

Ichirou looked tired. “I wouldn’t call it fine.”

“It’s been just fine, hasn’t it, Tomoki?”

The man let out a heavy sigh and then smiled a little at his wife.

“You must have had it hard,” Tomo said.

Ichirou reached over the table and gave Tomo a pat on the head.

“It’s fine, Tomo-kun. I married your mother.”

That wasn’t what Tomo had meant, but looking at Sawa, who was thoughtfully tilting her head as she was eating, it wasn’t hard to imagine having Sawa as a wife was about as frustrating as having her as a mother.

***

“Thank you for keeping my overly impulsive brother company today.”

“Ah. No, it was no problem at all. It was interesting to see their relationship in a different light.”

“Did you hear that, Kenta? You were someone else’s entertainment.”

Ken laughed. “Niisan, I’m an actor. Of course I’ll entertain many.”

Kouta smiled, but his face said that Ken was hopeless.

Tomo found it a shame that Ichirou was next to him as they stood at the entrance, since Ken had constantly been trying to get in as much physical contact and it made Tomo a little annoyed. Not that Ken kept trying, but it made him want some privacy so they could be normal.

Kouta put his hand on the door handle after both of them had put on shoes and their jackets, and Tomo felt like he would throw up as he watched it being pushed down. Thoughts raced much like his heart.

He didn’t want to be the disgrace of his family. He didn’t want to be the talk of the neighbourhood. He didn’t want to cause any trouble. He didn’t want to ruin Sawa’s marriage.

“Niisan, wait!” Ken said and Kouta let go of the handle, looking at his brother in confusion.

“What? Did you forget something?”

Ken put his hands on Tomo’s shoulders, after having briefly stopped mid-motion. “Tomo, it’s fine,” Ken whispered before he slipped the unzipped hoodie down.

“I’m sorry for the trouble, Ichirou-san,” Tomo heard Ken say over his head when he no longer wore it.

“No, none at all. I didn’t even realise.”

“We can leave now, niisan.”

Tomo looked up to see Ken turn away from him. He still followed them out, despite the chilly May evening. He felt something warm on his shoulders and saw it was Ichirou’s cardigan. He pulled it closer around him, offering his step-father a forced smile.

“My second time at Tomo-chan’s sucked,” Ken said with a pout, which made him laugh as it was so unlike him.

“Yama-senpai can come by anytime. It’d be fun.”

“Just so you know, I’m never driving you again, Kenta. Fuji-chan laughed at me while I was dozing off in the office.”

“Kouta-kun, don’t worry about that. I can drive these two when needed,” Ichirou said with a snigger.

“Ichirou-san, you have a license and car? I don’t mean to be rude. I know Sawa doesn’t have a car.”

Tomo looked at Ken, who shook his head ever so slightly. Neither of them knew why Kouta was so surprised, nor that Ichirou had a license.

As strange as he knew it was, Tomo never entered the garage. He never needed to, nor had he seen Ichirou drive or needed Ichirou to drive him anywhere.

Though it made sense, when he thought about it.

“I don’t use it much because there’s no need, but I drove quite a bit before I got married.”

“Is that so?”

“Indeed. It came with the job.”

“May I ask what you worked as, Ichirou-san? Were you a taxi driver, perhaps?”

Having never truly had time to sit down to talk with the man, it was no wonder Kouta was curious. However, Tomo had never found out what Ichirou had done for a living. He had wondered a few times, as the man was very skilled in housework, gardening and cooking. His guess was that perhaps the man had worked as a housekeeper.

“I was a police officer.”

Tomo tried to process what he just heard and glanced at Ken to figure out if he heard wrong.

“There’s a fair bit more than driving that comes with that occupation,” Kouta said. “But I feel like it would terrify me——” His voice became quieter until it eventually died out.

“I’ve been told that before. But I’ve also heard ‘the quieter person, the more terrifying the fury’ or the likes. Not that I quite understand it.”

“That aside, may I come by tomorrow? I’m not working tomorrow, right, Niisan?”

“No, you’re off tomorrow.”

“Ke—!!” Tomo abruptly stopped. “Yama-senpai, that’s too early! At least wait a few days.”

Tomo threw a glance toward the Hanakawa house, looking for any signs that Sakura would suddenly burst out through the door or that Chika would come running or send them a message to hurry up.

He had a few excuses ready, but he rather avoided the situation entirely.

“I can come after school and you drive me home. How about it?”

Ichirou laughed. “That sounds good to me. Just ask your mother first.”

“I’m sure she’ll be fine with it. She knows how close these two are,” Kouta said and ruffled Tomo’s hair, but his tone was more annoyed than playful or brotherly.

They probably caused him more trouble than they were worth.