CHAPTER 3 ¿HOW CAN I TELL YOU WHAT I FEEL?

Friday, March 8th, Derek was in his room reading a book but as he read in his mind Mary appeared what Mary wondered how she would be and who wanted to see her even to hug her but as she came that thought went fast she had to act normal when she this Nearby he wanted no one to notice but it was late Orlyn was still more insistent than before asking him if anything was wrong with him or that he would admit at once for all his feelings he did not understand why he was still in that plan and wondered Do he know anything? That was a mystery if Orlyn knew anything about what happened or Mary told her something or even in the worst case she knew what was happening to her and that would be the least she wants right now because she didn't feel ready yet either with the courage or strength to do it even when they were around her nerves made a bad move for her because every time she spoke or rather tried to utter a word she didn't I managed to do well as good as I could control it a little but it was very evident in every way always when I was standing next to her acting so it wouldn't have to be geniuses to imagine what happens in Derek even the one who doesn't know about the fast guessing subject and would look for a way to stop acting like that or find a way to look even more normal before her friends so that they wouldn't question him in front of she because if she thought she could do that and there is at that moment less desired to tell her I was looking for the best time to confess and take a chance but she would have to wait for the perfect moment even until the music I listened to reminded her she wondered if she had really fallen in love with her friend the only thing that went through her head is I AM A CASE I LOVE FROM MY FRIEND TO WHICH I WANT AS A SISTER I did not want anyone

I told him nothing should still act as usual with that spark but that spark was stronger every time Mary was around and that Orlyn realized but decided to keep quiet and let Derek of him first step, the solo and thus avoid any signs of anger through him besides that he would be in conflict because if the two decide to start a relationship and that at the time of having an argument he would not know which side to be on or who to support those were Orlyn's questions but he knows Derek so well that he would do everything I stopped thinking about it because she was getting ahead of the facts too quickly and didn't even know if Mary feels the same way as Derek and the question is how she took disappointment all she knew was if she told her feelings she would go away a weight above to not hide it and I would just have to trust what Derek does and whether it was up to him to WIN OR LOSE on this matter of life if she told her that she would be with the biggest smile in the world and would do everything she could to make Mary happier because she deserves all the happiness in the world so whether or not she gives her the opportunity she doesn't want that smile to be erased because she says DON'T STOP SMILING SOMEONE.

All she has is to make time go on course if that opportunity comes to her because she was born from the bottom of her heart and because she also feels the same thing that Derek is just waiting because life gives better results to those who are patient no matter how long it takes to wait while everything was still normal during the month of March had passed Derek's 21st birthday the normal step like any another because he is a guy who does not like parties very much nor likes to celebrate his birthday being sincere with the naked eye can be considered a boring guy but the opposite is that he does not attract attention the party or anything like that to other people is very reserved because he does not like to dance , take and even party what they know very well to him know that he is a healthy boy and the most important thing are his loved people but the one who has the most weight in his life is because he has the love of God and that is enough and he has enough although he knows that he has the affection of his family and friends what he liked the most is to do everything right all right and his friend Orlyn and Mary were also with that same mentality and attitude that's why they get along so well and especially because they bullying poor Orlyn so the days went by and Derek's feelings for some comb continued to grow more and more wanted to prevent that from happening but there was no reason to hide him she was falling in love with her friend Laura needed the advice of someone urgently but who I could ask Orlyn would be like winding him up and to say he was right and you didn't want to admit it the only solution was to contact a friend and ask her for help on the subject but I also knew it would be the same the same put the only letter he had left to keep what he felt presented perfect moments even some others were accurate to be able to tell her about her feelings but she could not again her nerves beat him scolded by being so cowardly and not telling her to not to keep hiding it but the more he let the days go, the more he could get ahead of himself with much more courage than him and declare to him if that happened he would never be forgiven for having let go of the great opportunity or opportunities he had and he didn't know how to take advantage of it especially that was his greatest fear that maybe someone had already beaten him or was doing what he couldn't do and that was being by his side to do it happier than it is and that that smile he has can be producted by someone else those were the worst fear That Derek had had to act fast because he knew that if he neglected more time he could miss the opportunity to tell him and would be left with the question that everything is asked What WOULD HAVE HAPPENED IF I HAD TOLD HIM WHAT

I'M SORRY? That question wanted to avoid it and it would be best if deep down I knew that the answer was not going to be positive on the contrary I was going to confirm to her what she knew she only sees as a friend, as a brother who didn't feel the same way he feels if he told her that would be a gain because he would no longer have the weight of continuing to hide it but the more he wanted to do it he couldn't find it or he couldn't see it and the opportunities would go away fast and with it also his courage and desire to tell him his feelings and the best would be to hide back what he feels because he said himself must be a sign not to tell him and to continue as they are just friends with that which he said hurt him in the heart he had to accept reality he could not fight with that because it was already what was said and when he could see Laura he was just she is staring at her beauty and in the great woman who was becoming she had to think we can only be friends, but they still followed her feelings because in the IN THE HEART NOBODY COMMANDS OR DECIDES WHO TO FALL IN LOVE was just a matter of accepting the opportunities presented to her so as not to waste them and thus avoid having that weight of hiding her feelings.