+35 Real Change

[!!!Trigger Warning!!!]

And then he broke.

He grabbed my shoulders , even with his mask on I could feel his messed feelings. I didn't know what he was going to next which is why I was pretty scared of him in that moment. Suddenly he fell down on his knees and started crying louder than before , luckily I used a magic spell to sound proof our conversation.

He looked at me who was still sitting down leaning back on the wall and finally told me his deepest pain.

×-×-×

"I-I didn't s-save her , I couldn't save h-her , after I gave my test I went out to celebrate with my friends when the party ended I headed straight for my apartment that's when I met her again. On my way home I met Sera , I could easily recognize her she didn't change that much. Besides her 2 sketchy men were walking just when I was going to escape Sera noticed me."

My legs were powerless , my hands dropped down were powerless , I was powerless as I looked at the moon above me. But I still continued ,

"She came up to me and slapped me and spat on my face , with a cigarette in her left hand she told me about how I ruined her life , how I ruined her perfect future she dreamt of. After ranting for few minutes she left me standing there , I somehow managed to walk back to the get on the bus after that interaction. But then I realised that my wallet was missing , The only place it could've been dropped was where I met Sera."

"So I visited the place where I met Sera and got slapped by her and was able to find my wallet. Just when I was about to head back home I heard some sounds following the sound I reached an ally where I saw Sera doing dr*gs with 2 other men."

I held my head with both of my hands covering my ears and said ,

"Hahahaha I-I didn't save h-her Lecilia. I-I couldn't d-do anything for her instead I destroyed her hahahaha destroyed her future , her life and now she was an addict. Just because I loved her I destroyed her, that spit on my face was something that I decided to hide by wearing a mask. I kept saying that I'll change just to keep myself going , but it was nothing more than just satisfying my guilt."

I started taking in deep breaths and stabilise my breathing

"Yuki was right I was no more than a puny loser , I could only be a burden Lecilia. I couldn't do anything in my past , I couldn't do anything to save Yuki , I couldn't do anything when I saw Sera again. I-I couldn't do sh*t."

I couldn't feel anything , the cold feeling again ran through my body again.

'Ah I've done it this time , after hearing what I did I'll probably get kicked from the palace.'

But then I felt a warm embrace from Lecilia. Her tears dripping on my face as I sat there powerless , I couldn't believe that even after hearing what I did she didn't hate me

"Why? Why are you hugging me? Leave me alone , don't come near."

I tried to shake her off but she was many levels higher than me which made it hard for me to even move. In the end I gave up on shaking her off and leaned on her shoulder.

"Why would you give me another hope just to take it away from? Just being with me will destr-"

"No it wouldn't , I'm strong...strong enough to not get destroyed."

Tears flowing out her eyes , I could feel her shivering in my hands wrapped around her.

'Bdump Bdump Bdump '

'Why are you doing this? Weren't we just stranger few hours ago? Wasn't I suppose to be no more than a guest? So why are making my heart beat so fast?'

I couldn't control myself I could finally feel my body which wasn't cold anymore. I put my hands on my on cheeks and felt her warmth , I took off my mask and closed the distance between us. I pushed my lips against her and felt my heart beating faster than ever. I couldn't control myself anymore , in the cold night I could only feel her warmth.

That's when I gave myself to her , a body created by nothing but coding but I still felt affection towards her. From that kiss I knew that even if I was hated by the whole world their was still one person who would

'Unfortunately this moment will be erased when the beta testing is over , but this warmth will always be with me forever.'

×-×-×

'We k-kissed!!! Why did I allow him to kiss me? Now I've to m-marry him. Y-Yes that's the only option now.'

My eyes rolled up as he kissed me. I couldn't help but blush , I couldn't control the expression I had on my face. I tried to hide my face from him but couldn't as he was too close to my face. I pushed him away and got up from where I was sitting and said ,

"L-Look you've k-kissed me so you've to m-marry me , no Noble will take me as his w-wife who already gave her first kiss to someone else."

I saw his surprised face which then changed into a smile , it looked like he was still hiding something.

"Is their still something you want to tell me about? Is something still bothering you?"

×-×-×

She was standing before stronger than anyone , I looked at her cherry like red face. Looking at her blushing face , how could I tell her that all this will be over once beta testing ends. The memories we will make would be erased from her brain , that's why I decided to hide the beta testing thing from her.

"No , there's nothing left to tell you."

After hearing my words she used some kind of spell and disappeared from my sight. I couldn't sleep so I went ahead and tried to learn more about my mana channel's , but I didn't try to unlock any of them. After few hours I was able to flow my mana from my core to more than half of my mana channel's entrance. This was only possible because of the leftover mana of Lecilia.

Her mana that was left in my channel's fused with mine , this was only possible because I didn't have any specific attribute right now. After finishing my mana channel training I returned to my room and slept for few hours , even though I slept in the game all my fatigue washed away during my sleep. It felt too real for a game.

After waking up at 7:00 I had a lite breakfast alone and planned to start my mana training again as some of my channel's were still unexplored. Flowing my mana in an unexplored channel was a process I'd to do before I open all my channel's , my plan was to explore as much as possible and open them all in one go.

I roamed around the palace searching for Lecilia but she was nowhere to be found. After searching for few minutes , I'd no choice but to ask for help from Garius. I headed towards his office which was located on the ground floor of palace , after reaching my destination I saw a butler near the office and asked him ,

"Is Lord Garius available now?"

The butler looked at me with no change in his expression and said ,

"Lord Garius ordered me to help Mr. Excess with the training gear so before meeting Lord Garius I would like to ask you to change into the training gear present in that room."

The butler pointed at a room which was right besides Garius's office. I thanked butler for helping me and changed into my training gear. The training gear consisted of a black slim armour which fit me perfectly , a pair of daggers and a sword I still had my mask on. It looked like the gear or personally made for me.

I tried to pick up the sword but just as I picked it up I couldn't control my hand and the sword fell from my hand. The reason wasn't the weight of the sword , suddenly a message appeared before me.

「 Player's selected class is Mage due to which player will be unable to use any type of sword 」

'Then how was I able to use the dagger , is dagger considered a throwable?'

Just when I was deep in my own thought the office door opened and Garius came out of his office. He looked at me with a smile on his face as always , he walked towards me with a man on his right side. I knelt down as to respect Lord Garius.

"Haha Excess let's start our training session then?"

×-×-×

Your slave sageT_T here , to those who think the romance is rushed read till chapter 60 and you'll see why it's so fast.