chapter 34

It's been about a month  since my break down at Sierra's place. And I think I can say I've reached a point where seeing or hearing his name doest make me want to hide in a little hole, rip my heart out and slap some sense into it. On the contrary the great love i had for him had gradually turned into hate. Great hate. 

And well the feeling was mutual, he never seemed to miss a chance to make my life hell and show off his oh great relationship with Marrisa knight. Have I mentioned she hates me and she's constantly in my face, being the person i am, I am always fighting back hence boyfriend of the year hating me on behalf of his girlfriend. Fuck that. Fuck them.

The nightmares are haywire. I get them every night and sometimes when I doze off somewhere so I avoid dozing off, the medicine helps, but lately it's been making me sick, I'd throw up, sometimes I wake up with a fever but it's the only way to take these demons. My life has spiralled into a huge  fucking mess and sometimes I dont know how to handle it, it seems the only thing am good at is pretending. Pretending that am okay 

Today is the last day of school before we go in for our Christmas break. And I am not excited because. 

1. I don't want to see my mother or  Finn's face every day for the next few weeks.

2. That means my father's death anniversary is close.

December 26th, that's when he died of stage four leukaemia, sometimes I have trouble remembering what he looked like before the cancer. Every time I close my eyes I see his small body and bald head. It's the memory that lives in my head. It haunts me. 

He loved us so much, he reminded us every day, even the last day. He would ask me to do make up on him, I even bought a wig for him, he didn't want JJ to know he was in pain. 

He always said, "you're a little older, you can understand what's going on, JJ isn't that's why we do this, and it kills me that I can't protect you from seeing me die," I cried at the memory. 

I was standing at my locker well aware that someone could see me but I just couldn't help how sad I felt. Someone handed me their handkerchief and I took it, I didn't look up, I was too embarrassed to. 

The person took my hand and started walking us outside the school to the bleachers, I looked up and immediately recognised him, I tried to pull my hand out of his but he held me tighter. 

"Sit" he requested and I glared, I wasn't in the mood to deal with him right now, 

"I don't want to, why did you drag me out here Hunter?" I asked 

"Just sit down  damn, you don't have to be stubborn about everything," I rolled my eyes but sat next to him. 

Something was off, he didn't seem okay. 

"What's wrong? " I asked and he shook his head. 

"Coming from someone that was crying in the middle of a crowded hallway," 

"I .... I wasn't feeling so well, my belly hurt," I lied pathetically and he gave me a pissed off look like I had just called him stupid. 

"The problem with you Lia, is you want to save everyone but you won't let anyone save you..." he yelled angrily 

" I don't need saving..," I yelled back.

"Oh really, because it seemed to me like you did," 

"Fuck you Hunter," I made a move to stand up but he grabbed my hand and pulled me back where I was seated. 

"Am sorry, okay, let's just sit here for a minute please... Please," something about him pleading made me soft. I knew Hunter had his own issues, we had never talked about them but I knew he was almost as broken as me. So I sat back and we just stayed there, we didn't talk, it seemed everytime we tried, we fought, and I didn't have the energy to fight with him today, he didn't seem to have it in him either. 

I quickly walked to the theatre room trying not to freak out, I was late for a class and I had left one of my textbooks there, my face developed a frown at how late I was. 

I took a deep breath as I reached the Theater room, not bothering to knock because I assumed it was empty, I budged in and almost fainted at what I saw. 

But before I tell you what I saw let me first fill you in on some juice

During the past three weeks something insane happened to my best friend Dylan and the tale goes like this.

It was a disastrous Monday morning when Dylan Press walked into the History class looking like he had jumped right off the hot mess express and hoped right into class, worried and in need of a destruction from her own personal disastrous yet nonexistent love life,  Lia stretched her arm and asked if he was okay, 

He looked at her with sad eyes and sent her a weak smile. 

The day goes on with Dylan looking exasperated and on the edge, he had successfully managed to avoid his teacher and old lover for almost a whole week but he was unsettled  and Frankly tired of running and hiding like a chicken and Dylan was never one to hide, he was known for confrontation and bravery, and with that he made up his mind to talk to Xavier and finally put an end to this cat and mouse game they seemed to be playing. 

At the end of the day, right after his last class, he walked into the theatre room and stared at the man that was going through students' assignments with his forehead creased, something he seemed to do when he was frustrated. 

Dylan stood in awe looking at the handsome man in front of him, and wishing the moment could last longer, he was not looking forward to this conversation in fact it took all his strength to not bolt from that room. 

Dylan cleared his throat and Xavier looked up, eyes slightly widening in shock for he didn't expect Dylan to approach him. 

"Uhmmm. Can we, uhmm maybe talk, if you're not too busy." Dylan stammered through his statement, which was weird, Dylan Press never stammered. 

"Sit," Xavier replied trying to not sound too harsh but you could still hear the anger laced in his voice. 

"I would like to begin by saying....." 

"Why the fuck did you lie to me?" Xavier interrupted, unable to control his nerves any longer. 

"First of all, I didn't lie, i just didn't tell you, because at that time i was positive I would never see you again," 

"What the hell Dylan? Am an older man I clearly told you my age, why did you go through with it? How old are you, like seventeen?" 

"Eighteen, am legal, calm the fuck down,"

"Even though Dylan, do you know what this could do to me if somebody found out." 

"As I mentioned before this wasn't supposed to happen, we weren't supposed to meet again geez there's a reason I didn't call you ever," Dylan spoke, starting to get ticked off by Xavier's attitude but something flashed in his eyes, and Dylan could swear it looked like hurt. 

"I just wanted to tell you that you have nothing to worry about, i won't tell anyone. We should just stick to not making this awkward," said Dylan 

"for both of us,"  he added and turned to walk out but was stopped by the sound of Xavier's voice once again. 

"I waited for your call," he said softly, much calmer and Dylan's heart skipped a beat. He turned around and looked at Xavier, his thoughts running wild. 

"Don't say that, you can't say things like that." Dylan whispered out unable to sound any louder and Xavier walked up to him slowly until his face was mere inches from Dylan's. 

"I hoped I would see you walking down the streets one day," he got closer, his body now fully pressed on Dylan's. 

"I hoped I could run into you in the supermarket or at the movies, for so long i wished and when you never called i got angry, angry at how easily i had let something good slip out of my hands, and then i was angry at the thought of wanting someone that didn't want me back." Xavier added.

"Xavier...."

"Shhhhh," he pressed his finger on Dylan's lips and Dylan shivered electricity running through his entire body, thankful for the door he was leaning against otherwise he was sure he's knees would give out and he would fall on the ground. 

"Seeing you in class that day had me all kinds of messed up, i felt elated, scared, rejected, and worst of all i still wanted you, thats why am angry, not because am you're sub and it's practically illegal to bend you over my desk and fuck you senseless, i mean i leave in a few weeks am not even a teacher," he grabbed Dylan's chin.

"What scares me is you not wanting me as much as I want you," he said, kissing the area below his ear making Dylan let out a low moan and Xavier smirked.

"Go out with me?" Xavier asked, taking a step back and putting his hands in his pockets. Dylan's eyes widened, shock and pain evident in them he hated what he was about to do. He backed away from him. 

"Am sorry, I can't..." he said and walked away leaving Xavier heartbroken and sad.  He told me he didn't want to jeopardise Xavier's career, or get him in trouble but I also knew that Dyls was scared, he was terrified to give his heart to someone again. 

Over the next couple of weeks, they avoided each other, they didn't talk, Dylan wouldn't even look at him but I occasionally caught mr. Brooks staring at Dylan longingly. It was honestly sad to watch but I couldn't do anything, it was Dylan's decision to make. 

Which is why I was shocked at what I had found them doing. Xavier was straightening his shirt and Dylan was trying to hide his blush. I had caught them making out, which I didn't know how to feel about, honestly I was more worried than shocked. worried about how reckless they could be to make out at school. 

Xavier cleared his throat trying to come up with a lie as to why his tongue was down my best friend's throat and why his zipper was open. 

"Miss Jenkins..." he said worry evident in his tone

"Mr. Brooks.." I replied matching his tone.

"Your classmate had something in his eye. I was helping him get rid of it." He lied 

"Right, right, just like you had something in your pants he was helping you get rid of huh." I spoke and i swear  he blushed everywhere it was hard to know if it was from terror or embarrassment maybe both but we'll never know cause Dylan burst out laughing,  

"Dylan you can't laugh right now, what if someone else walked in on you guys, be serious that was reckless of you guys," I complained putting my hand on my hip to look more serious, he stopped laughing and looked at me apologetically. 

"Am sorry, it's just his face was priceless, I know how serious this is,"  he replied, Xavier was still very much in shock that Dylan and I were talking about this so casually. 

"Sorry..," Dylan picked up on his lover's confused face "this is my best friend,  Lia," he reintroduced us and I smiled at him. 

"Xavier, am so happy to be reintroduced to you, but am so disappointed in the both of you, I can't imagine what would happen if it was someone else walking in on both of you, that was reckless," 

"Sorry, we got caught in the moment," Dylan explained finally catching on the severity of their action, 

"So you won't be telling on us," Xavier asked, trying to piece things together. 

"Never..." I smiled and he smiled back.

"Well, Lia and I should leave, uhmm I'll call you later," Dylan told Xavier and they held eye contact for a while, communicating with their eyes, before Dylan grabbed my hand and walked me out of there. 

"You have so much explaining to do," I giggled as we closed the door and he laughed.