CHAPTER 12

CHAPTER 12 - RETURNING NOTHING

Fck! My hand automatically touched my lips as my mind was grasping for something that I could do to make it seem like it was cool.

"I uh.." I tried, but I couldn't say anything. "Goodnight." Then I tiptoed to kiss his cheeks-- Way to embarrass myself more! Then I immediately pressed my keycard to enter my unit.

I heard him calling my name and knocking on my door. "I'm already sleepy, Clarence. Whatever it is you're going to say, it could wait once we woke up." I hollered while my back was leaning against the door.

I heard him sighed before mumbling, "Goodnight."

I thought I could sleep, but I couldn't. I decided to go to Jen after a few hours of trying. So here I am now, laying on her bed, waiting for her to come back. I had breakfast with the Camdens and washed the dishes with her before going to her room. She was making hot cocoa while I was trying to sleep in her room.

But when I heard the creaks on the floor, I knew I lost my chance. She opened the door and took the tray with three mugs of hot cocoa from the accent table outside her room before coming in. "Mariel's on her way."

She put the tray on her table before handing me the mug. "Thanks."

"So.." She started before flapping herself on the bed. "What happened?" She continued after propping, scooting beside me.

"Nothing happened." I replied, then took a sip of the hot cocoa that I, later on, regretted cause it burned my tongue and throat, so I started fanning my lips like it could stop the burning.

She chuckled at my reaction. "That's for lying. I'm pretty sure you wouldn't just come here early in the morning because 'nothing happened'." She concluded, using an air quotation for the last two words. "Anyway, you can stay quiet for now cause once Mariel showed up, you know there's no way you wouldn't tell us about it."

True to her words, once Mariel arrived, they didn't stop pestering me to tell them what happened. Hell, Mariel didn't even take a minute to rest from the drive. Once she opened the door, I could already hear her holler from downstairs. The Camdens were pretty used to us being so loud anyway.

She sprinted towards me and lunged at me after slamming Jen's door shut. I grunted at her weight, crashing me. "I wanna hear about that 'nothing happened'." She chortled, giving me the idea that Jen told her about my reluctance to tell them.

Jen decided to join us and lunge at us, crashing and pressing me more against the bed. I grunted and shouted for help, especially when they tackled and started tickling. These two bitches!

"You guys, stop!" I shouted while struggling from their grips.

"Unless you tell us what happened," Mariel grunted, tickling me more.

I was thankful I didn't have asthma cause if I did, I'd be buried 6-feet under by now. My tears were brimming my eyes, and I couldn't take it anymore, so I just surrendered. So here we were, on our pajamas-- Yes, we drove here on our pajamas-- with hot cocoas on our hands. We were playing Disney Princesses movies as background noise while we talked about what happened earlier.

So I told them about what we had done. How we awkwardly looked away when we met each other's eyes as we danced. Sang to Post Malone during the whole drive going to the cliff. Then we waited for the wolves howl and talked about the existence of other creatures. Scaring each other as we told our spooky experiences. How we laughed at a standup comedy that we watched on Netflix through his phone and how I embarrassed myself for thinking he wanted to kiss my lips.

"You did what?!" Mariel asked ridiculously while trying to stop her laugh.

I took the blanket and hid from embarrassment before I could even hear their boisterous laugh. "Alex kissed her male friend. Alex kissed her male friend." They zinged in chorus, and I could feel them jumping on the bed.

"I didn't know, okay? I thought.." I sighed and sat up as I showed myself to them. "I thought he wanted to kiss me, so I acted cool like it was nothing and leaned in to meet him halfway. I didn't know he meant a kiss on the cheek. That was so grade school, Harry would kiss my cheeks without even asking me." I continuously blabbed.

They both stopped laughing at something I said.. "Wait wait.. What?" Mariel asked, completely puzzled by what I've said. "Harry kissed you?"

My eyes widened. I didn't just tell them Harry kissed me, did I?

"That was.." I stuttered, not knowing how to say it without hurting Mariel. "It was nothing.. Harry was just being Harry." I reasoned out, trying to assure Mariel.

She huffed. "Don't worry about me. It's not like Harry's the only guy on Earth. Besides, I realized I'm not really into him.." She explained when she felt I was feeling bad about Harry kissing me. "..last night." She continued, and we already knew something happened.

"No! Nothing happened, swear!" She continued when she noticed our reaction to her confession. "He's just not who I thought he was. He's a good guy, though, Alex. If ever you and Clarence didn't work out, maybe with Harry it would." She then ended her statement with a smile and a rub on my shoulder.

"So.. Back to the topic! How was the kiss?" She asked, changing the subject.

"It was short--"

"Like you wanted more?" Jen interjected, looking at Mariel then they both laughed.

I grunted. "I don't, okay? You asked me how it was, so I said it was short."

Jen chuckled, rolling her eyes at me. "Whatever makes you sleep at night. Why do you think he wanted to kiss you, though? Aren't you guys 'just friends'?" She asked, putting an air quotation in the last 2 words.

"Just friends" Mariel reiterated with an air quotation.

"It was.. It was a long night. So I thought.. I thought he got carried away with everything and wanted to kiss me-- I don't know, okay? Even I didn't know why I kissed him. He's attractive and all, but that's it. We are.. JUST. FRIENDS." I grumbled towards the middle of my words and drawled the 'JUST FRIENDS'.

"That kiss." They both added, making me stomped my feet on the bed.

We talked for God knows how long, until I decided to go home cause it was past evening. Once I reached the lobby, I was shocked to see Clarence there.

"Hey." He greeted or was more like a croak.

"Hey." I greeted back.

"Where were you?" He asked as we walked towards the elevator.

"At Jen's, dad." I kid, trying to somehow lighten up the mood. "Was it past my curfew?"

He shrugged off my joke, though. "Have you eaten dinner already?"

"Yeah, and I was tired, so I wanted to sleep." I reasoned out, hinting to him that I didn't wanna talk about it. We both knew he wanted to, but if that's gonna lead to something bad.. Nah, I don't want it.

"Just give me a few minutes. I just wanna ask you something." He pleaded. I turned to him as I sighed. I noticed the dark circles under his eyes like he hadn't gotten asleep, just like me. His hair was messy, like he kept on pulling it or tugging it.

I bit my lip as I nodded, giving him a few minutes.

He took the chance and didn't even bother beating around the bush. "Why did you kissed me?" His question caught me off guard, I automatically stepped back.

I blinked a few times, not knowing what to say. Jen and Mariel didn't help me think of an answer for this. Instead, they told me to tell the truth, but I couldn't just tell him that I assumed he wanted to kiss me. He would definitely think I was into him, and that would make us awkward, especially if he didn't like me that way-- Not that I like him that way, but of course, I didn't want him to think that I do or I.. I don't know.

I feigned a snort, "T'was just a kiss, Clarence. Let's not make a big deal out of it." I exclaimed, still trying to keep my cool even though I could feel knees slowly turning jell-o.

He sneered, "Just a kiss." He slowly nodded his head, looking away as if he got slapped in the face with reality. "Of course, you'd kiss people for nothing." He croaked, barely understandable but I did. He then looked back at me, smiling-- A smile that didn't even reach his eyes.

"Goodnight." He said before leaning towards me and gave me a peck on the lips. Seeing my shocked face, he shrugged his shoulder as if it was just nothing. "T'was just a kiss, Alex."

He turned his back to me and walked to his pad, leaving me here in front of mine, dumbfounded.

My pretense bravery subsided, took over the weakling me who found support on my door as I leaned against it. I didn't know what I felt, but it's definitely not anger..