Ch 45 Break IV
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The viewers from the past and the future sat in the dining room, eating their food as Peter said, "Okay, that was the best one so far!"
Tony started, "Come on ki-"
"Don't kid yourself." Scott said, "That was the best one."
"I know right!" Hope said.
"I'm not forgetting this anytime soon." Tony muttered as he took a bite of his bread while everyone chuckled.
"He will get back at you." Pepper joked.
Thor asked, "And what about me?"
"Eh, you got the most boring one." Jessica said and everyone laughed as both Tony and Thor pouted while Steve simply smiled and continued to eat, not paying it much attention.
"Well, what do you guys think now?" Benjamin asked.
"Well", Natasha turned to Fury and Hill, "You know what? We're not done."
"Am I hearing that right, Agent Romanoff?" Fury asked.
"Yes." Natasha said, "I think it is clear why you have trust issues. But please- do not keep secrets from us again."
She then raised her hand and Fury said, "All right. I won't be keeping secrets to myself and Hill from now on."
With that, he shook her hand. They were partners again. She shook hands with Hill too as Steve said, "I think this works better."
"Yup." Clint said.
"Couldn't have said it better myself." Tony said as he continued to eat.
And then suddenly, a song started playing in the background-
It's what you hearin (Listen)
It's what you hearin (Listen)
It's what you hearin (Listen)
"Who's playing that?" Tony asked.
"Oh boy!" Logan groaned.
"What a timing!" Matt said.
"Who is it, guys?" Bucky asked.
"Don't ask." Frank said.
And then a man in a red and black suit with two katanas on his back entered, dancing hysterically to the music.
X gon give it to ya
Fuck wait for you to get it on your own
X gon deliver to ya
Knock knock, open up the door, it's real
With the non-stop, pop pop and stainless steel
Go hard gettin busy wit it
But I got such a good heart
I'll make a motherfucker wonder if he did it
Damn right and I'll do it again
Cuz I am right so I gots to win
Break break wit the enemy
But no matter how many cats I break bread wit
I'll break who you sendin me
You motherfucker never wanted nothin
But your wife said, that's for the light day
I'm gettin down, down
Make it say freeze
But won't be the one endin up on his knees (Whoo)
Please, If the only thing you cats did is come out to play
Get out my way
"Uhhhh, nobody is in your way." Luke said as he continued shaking his head around at the music and danced.
First we gonna ROCK, Then we gonna ROLL
Then we let it POP, GO LET IT GO
X gon give it to ya
He gon give it to ya
X gon give it to ya
He gon give it to ya
And then he bowed down, acting as if he had gotten a standing ovation, "Hello, ladies and gentlemen from the past. I had no idea you lot were already here. The Disney-Fox merger is working wonders."
"What?" Aunt May asked.
"Ignore him." Logan said.
"Who are you?" Thor asked him.
"Wade Wilson." Odinson told him.
"AKA Deadpool." Wade announced with raised hands.
"Why? Your dead body was found in a pool?" Loki asked dryly.
"No! It was…not found at all." Wade said, "Because I am alive!"
That was when he noticed Peter and looked at Benjamin too, "OH! I got something for you two!"
And then he put on another song-
Raise up, get yourself together
And drive your funky soul
Raise up, get yourself together
And drive that funky soul
He pointed his fingers in random directions and walked into a room. He then walked out wearing a coat and pulling it, clapped.
Raise on up, get yourself together
Drive that funky soul
Raise up, get yourself together
And drive that funky soul
He then rotated his arms, moving his body around and dancing hysterically before switching off the music. But when he stopped, all he saw was everyone giving him wide-eyed and wide-jawed looks.
And then his eyes suddenly widened, "OH MY GOD! YOU'RE TOM HOLLAND! I THOUGHT YOU WERE TOBEY MAGUIRE!"
He then threw off his coat and started looking around hysterically, as if thinking, "Man, I am so embarrassed. I did the Tobey Maguire Spider-Man dance in front of Tom Holland. What the fuck?"
He then looked up and said, "Fuck you Aragorn II Elessar. When you said you'll give me a cameo in 'A Beautiful Journey', I expected better than this. Now come to my show again. Let's have it. Venn Diagram vs. sword and guns. Let's have it."
"Is he okay?" Sam asked in concern.
"He doesn't look okay." Rhodes said.
"He always behaves like that." Logan said.
He then suddenly hugged Peter, "I heard Sony is taking you away. I'm so sorry to hear that."
He hugged Benjamin too, "I'm gonna miss you buddy. You are in our hearts, Tommy. I wish we could star in a movie together."
He then suddenly hugged Logan too, "And I wish we could as well, Hugh."
Logan pushed him away angrily and he fell into Tony whom he hugged, "You have come a long way since Aragorn had me call you and your stans out. Wish we could have shared the screen."
He then hugged Steve as well, "Aww, Chris. The human embodiment of perfection. You are the perfect man. I wish we could star in a movie together."
He then pointed at Hill and said to Steve, "Go climb that Hill, Captain."
Both Steve and Hill blushed in embarrassment as Wade looked up and said, "You know what Aragorn? Fuck you! You gave me an embarrassing entry. And you always put me in T-Rated stuff. And you make me team up with Justin Bieber. I'm gonna reveal your dirty little secret."
He then turned to Trish and said, "Rachael Taylor. Aragorn is in love with you. He dreams about you day and night. He is obsessed."
After making a shocked Pikachu face, Trish asked, "What?"
"You're making Pikachu faces at me? At me?" Wade yelled angrily and everyone looked shocked.
Logan got up and said, "Look Wade-"
"First of all, I'm still not sure if I'm in the 70's or 80's or 90's or 2000's or some post-apocalyptic future." Wade said, "And then Disney and Sony's deal goes south. The mouse couldn't keep it in his pants. Then I have to go around killing WestAllen and Katie Cassidy fanatics with Justin Bieber of all people!"
He then pointed at Logan and Frank, "Though you two were there with me the last two times."
He then looked up and said, "You know what? Fuck the mouse! Fuck the fanatics! Fuck Aragorn II Elessar! Fuck 'The Days of Reckoning' or whatever that shitpiece of a fic is! Fuck Justin Bieber! Fuck everything! Fuck my life!"
He then yelled, "My inner Nicolas Cage is SCRAPING AT THE DOOOAH! SCRAPING AT THE DOOOAH! Now I won't stay here anymore or I'LL EAT YOUR STINKING SOUUUUL!"
With that, he leapt out of the window as everyone looked down but he staggered back up and said, "I'mma go time travel and fix this shit!"
He then walked off and disappeared from view as Steve started, "Well that was…"
"Ridiculous and random?" Logan asked and they nodded.
"So, sleepy?" Benjamin asked.
"After that? We all need it." Tony said and everyone chuckled as they got up and walked off to sleep.
"Today was intense." Benjamin said, "But at least Tony and Bucky are on better terms and the trust issues are reduced."
"Yes. That was good." Matt agreed.
"All in all, a good day." Frank said.
"I think it's time for us to go." Elektra said and then Benjamin, Logan and Odinson shook hands with all of them as Matt, Elektra, Frank, Jessica, Luke and Trish walked off to patrol the streets.
"And next is?" Benjamin asked just to be sure.
"My new friends." Thor chuckled.
"Right!" Logan said, "They are going to die from the ridiculousness."
"They survived a few minutes of Wade. They'll be fine." Benjamin joked and they all chuckled.
"Well, let's get some sleep ourselves." Logan said and they all nodded before walking off to sleep.