#Overthinking

You can't keep the air from falling without falling.

As I talked about overthinking in the last chapter, why not dig in more? Most overthinkers in the nights is based on where they stands in their relationship. Why are you the only one trying? Am I a priority to my partner? All doubts and thoughts kicks in at once and all you tend to do is have your ears all plug and turn the volume all the way up with the most intense depressing and sad songs that can be able to relate to your situation. The tears running down your cheeks, trying to cry yourself to sleep and you keep losing it all by having a wall built up inside you; in your heart; in your mind and then all you can think about is disappearing in everyone lives and has another chance to start over to a place where you feel all wanted. Why? Why do that to yourself? Do you think it's healthy? No! It's not! You just killing your inside up into pieces that you won't even have that chance in you to put it all back together. I know it is not something easy to stop doing. You keep it away from your elder ones let's say for instance your parents and you isolate yourself from everyone where you keep yourself locked up in your room or stayed in the dark because they are adults they probably don't know your pain and know what you going through. Isn't that what you think and say to yourself? Please, Stop! Pick that crown up and placed it on your head. You don't deserve to be like this and to be treated like this. You can't keep treating yourself like this. Where would it take you in life? It won't take you nowhere, trust me.

You the one that have the very same heart everyone wants. You know why? Because you forgive, you love and you trust easily. There is no time for hate when it comes to anything you do in your life. But why having a heart like that get you treated in the most disappointed way that you can't even imagine? Even the ones you deal with in your everyday life don't know this deep dark part about you. Could it be their the cause for you being this way? But why hold on still? You're only hurting yourself, but what haunts you is having to lose that person. I mean what are the odds? You are afraid of starting over with someone else, moving on and thinking there is not going to be another chance for you. You can get rid of the person but can you get rid of the memories and all the time you spend together?