Ch.4: Love is a curious thing

:: Raziel POV ::

Dragons, shamans, demigods, shifters, faeries and all manner of supernatural beings mingled together in Orion's garden to celebrate Nuri's coming of age.

If you ask me, Orion's house feels more like a castle than a mere mansion. It sits atop a hill, surrounded by thick forests and has a magnificent view of the ocean. Anyone can easily tell Orion and Nile spent years, perhaps even decades, of careful thought and planning to make their home the way it is. And to open their doors to anyone and everyone, it goes to show how much the supernatural community has grown and continues to move forward towards a better future.

I kept to the shadows and stood isolated from the crowd as I quietly observed the guests enjoy the celebration. I was never good with social gatherings, that's Syrath's forte. I came because Orion asked me to and his mate, Nile, would skin me if I don't. And my brother won't shut up about it.

Syrath said it would be rude if I declined the invitation, at the last minute. I gave my word and if I don't show up, it would appear like I'm slighting Nuri. Orion is a Great Wyrm, an elder dragon. Even as Dragon Lord, I cannot slight him without just cause. So I followed Syrath to attend the gathering with the intention of politely leaving early.

I spied Syrath at the other end of the garden having an animated discussion with an elf and a djinn. Knowing my brother, he's probably plying them with a variety of alcoholic drinks while covertly wresting some sensitive information or well-kept secrets. Not for anything nefarious but because he could. Syrath is the embodiment of the phrase 'overly curious'.

I enjoy acquiring knowledge, as much as the next dragon. But my brother is different. Syrath has always been hungry for more information, more knowledge. Even when we were wyrmlings he's always been more aware, more curious. He would ask endless questions, explore and tinker. My brother enjoyed learning about anything and everything.

Syrath possesses more knowledge and wisdom than any of the regular wyrms I know or heard of. Aside from Great Wyrms, like Orion, who have thousands of years of accumulated knowledge, no one would beat my brother when it comes to learning.

Orion once stated he'd like Syrath to become his apprentice, to teach him old magic and groom him to be an elder. I've never seen my brother blush until that day. But Syrath, being Syrath, told Orion he was honored for the opportunity and the trust he was given. But Syrath believed himself to be too young and was honest with his desire to see more of the world. In short, Syrath respectfully declined the invitation.

Orion was not deterred and reassured Syrath that he was more than worthy and in time, would make a wonderful Great Wyrm. I, of course, agree with Orion's assessment. Nobody devours knowledge and accumulates wisdom like my brother.

Honestly, I think Orion was more pleased after Syrath declined his tutelage. This decision displayed Syrath's insatiable thirst for learning and his willingness to explore the world and learn about its secrets on his own, using his own strength. This show of independence is what made him a great candidate in Orion's eyes. I could tell, when the time comes, Orion would send for Syrath and my brother would eventually take his rightful place.

As if sensing my gaze on him, Syrath turned on my direction and questioningly raised a brow. He waited for a few breaths before politely excusing himself from the crowd that gathered around him and made his way towards me.

"Why are you standing here, acting like a stalker?" He joked, handing me a fresh flute of champagne.

Yes, contrary to popular belief, dragons don't feast on a virgin's blood or devour the flesh of a newborn child when we're celebrating a special occasion.

"I'm thinking how giddy you must be feeling right now." I sipped the champagne he gave me and I continued, "With all these unsuspecting creatures waiting for you to unravel their secrets, how could you not be happy?"

Syrath muttered some insane profanity under his breath but couldn't deny what I just said. I laughed out loud and toasted my brother. To be honest, I envy Syrath. He always has a fresh perspective and everything seems to interest him. I, on the other hand, barely have anything to keep me occupied these days. Everything bores me.

For a time, we remained on our secluded corner and chatted. And for the first time, in a long while, I managed to take my mind off the issues I'm currently suffering. Syrath quickly caught on to my mood and kept me occupied. He shared a crazy story about a vampire and shifter and tattled about some beings who were in attendance. And to make it more lively, he pointed them out to me, one by one.

I was starting to relax and actually enjoy the gathering. Then all of a sudden, something within me vibrated. The force was so strong, my body swayed and I lost my balance. I stumbled and would have fallen to the ground if Syrath hadn't caught me in time.

"Are you alright?" He asked worriedly. I nodded in response and frantically looked around, trying to find the source of the resonance. "Do you want me to take you inside?" This time, I shook my head.

I didn't want to leave. I want to know what this is about and who's sending it. My heart pounded and all my senses were on high alert, ready for the chase.

"It's here!" I whispered hoarsely, my eyes darting from one end of the garden to the other. Aside from the first time I felt the resonance, almost five years ago, I've never felt it pulse this strongly and clearly. If my guess is correct, today's the day that it would be revealed to me.

"Is something the matter, Raziel? Syrath?" Orion inquired as he approached us from the side and behind him was his daughter, Nuri, who was talking to…

Oh my fucking… Shit! NO! NO! NO! There has to be some kind of mistake. It can't be! How can it be possible?

But no matter how I tried to deny the possibility, it was of no use. When the person turned, to see what was happening, our eyes met and held. And in that moment, I knew, there was no mistaking it.

The resonance I've been feeling and following, all these years, was radiating from Quinn Lockhart.

I unconsciously took a cautious step back when Quinn moved forward to stand beside Orion. Her face was slightly flushed and she frowned when she noticed my uncanny reaction to her presence. Blessedly, she did not comment on it.

Does she know? Can she feel it? Or was I the only one stressing over it?

"You'll have to excuse me, Orion." I said as I turned to our host, trying hard not to look and acknowledge the person standing beside him. "I cannot stay. I'm not feeling well."

Orion eyed me closely and offered generously, "There's plenty of room inside the house where you could rest, would you..."

"NO!" I might have declined louder than necessary and earned a few curious glances from some onlookers, who gathered not far from us. "No, thank you." I amended calmy, trying hard not to flee the scene. "I need to leave. If you'll excuse me…"

I didn't bother to wait for a reply. I'll send my apologies to Orion and his family later. Right now, I need to get away, far away, from Quinn.

Syrath accompanied me back. He didn't say anything or questioned my behavior. He only stared at me to assess I wasn't physically ill then stood quietly, by the tall windows, and waited for me to explain.

I paced around like a caged animal. I loosened my tie and ran a shaking hand through my already tousled hair. I roughly undid the cuffs of my shirt and only succeeded in mutilating the diamond buttons. I discarded my coat earlier. It now lay in a messy heap on the carpeted floor.

This cannot be happening. Not to me. A fucking mating call! Shit! Damn! How could that even be possible?

Quinn is a half fae. She's not a dragon! If Quinn had dragon's blood, Syrath and I would have felt it! I would know, wouldn't I?

It's bad enough that she's a half breed but she's from a different breed altogether. We can't mate, no matter how you look at it. It's forbidden and I will not break my ancestors' covenant! Dragons are a dying breed and we don't, no, we never mate with anyone other than our own kind.

I stopped pacing, something inside me snarled at the thought, making me cringe and falter. Just thinking about those things made me feel like a scum, a snob and a fucking hypocrite!

I don't deny that I am physically attracted to Quinn. Even when I didn't feel the resonance of the mating call radiating from her, I could feel a certain pull towards her. An undeniable infatuation and attraction of sorts, something unique that I've never felt with anyone before.

Honestly, I want Quinn as a lover. This is one of the reasons why I'm so irritated and annoyed at her because I know she'd want more than a tumble in the sheets. Complicated and sensitive people, like Quinn, often do. But to go as far as to mate with her? No, absolutely not!

The time of the Saurian Lords has long since passed, melted into history and written off as nothing more than a legend for children to enjoy. But you cannot forget what's in your blood!

I want wyrmlings. I want offspring to carry my bloodline, to pass my treasures to and to inherit my magic. If I take Quinn as my life mate, I could kiss my future wyrmlings goodbye.

I paused and took a moment to examine how I felt about that thought. It wasn't as devastating as I feared. True, I wouldn't have a daughter to dote on or a son to groom as my successor. But other than the initial shock and the possibility of not having an offspring, I feel… content, almost happy, at the thought of spending a lifetime with Quinn.

I shook my head violently. NO! What the hell am I thinking? Why am I even considering this? There's no way this could be permitted. I am born from a noble house and if I do not follow the rules then who else will?

I sighed in defeat. I could still get out of this predicament. I could ignore the mating call. I've seen dragons do it and they managed to survive, unscathed and unaffected. Of course, it would be a difficult and complicated process. But I'd seen others pull through this kind of situation and there's no reason why I wouldn't be able to.

I need to get away from Quinn. We haven't physically mated and I haven't given her my mark. I could disregard and reject the mating call. My heart twisted at the thought but this is for the best. My feelings and instincts cannot be trusted, not this time. I have to follow logic, for once. This is for the sake of all dragonkind!

Once I strengthened my resolve, I turned to Syrath, ready to tell him what happened at the party and what I intended to do about it. But before I could utter a single word, I felt my world consumed in darkness as the dark fog of unconsciousness surrounded me…

:: Quinn POV ::

What we have between us, what we're doing together, it wasn't making love. But it certainly isn't just sex. I don't know what it is. I don't have the exact word to define it. And most times, I'm afraid to put a label on it.

I guess I was blind, enamored and enraptured by him. From the moment we met until now, I've been a willing captive. But whatever it is that we are bringing and giving to each other, it's more than just physical pleasure but less than emotional ties.

I love him. I've loved him from the moment I first saw him. But I don't know if my feelings are enough for both of us to live on because I am certain he doesn't love me back. He cannot. I could delude myself into thinking otherwise when we're together. During those wondrous stolen moments, when I have him all to myself, I could fool myself into thinking that what we have is real.

But once the magic is gone, I'm not naïve to think what happens between us goes beyond that moment. When he's with me, I am his and he is mine. We're together and nothing else matters. But when we're apart, I'm sure I am nothing but a speck of dust on his otherwise unblemished life.

At the moment, I am watching him sleep. I'd never get tired of it. His dark hair softly falling over his brows, his full lips slightly parted and his long lashes shadowing his cheeks. His even breathing, the warmth of his body and the relaxed beating of his heart beneath my questing fingers, all of it are familiar to me. Carefully filed and imprinted in my memory, stored in the deepest recesses of my heart. I am collecting every scrap because I know moments such as this would not last forever.

A tear escaped from the corner of my eyes and I impatiently brushed it away. It's time. Dawn is coming. After our many nights together, I started to fear the sight of a sunrise, afraid this might be the day. The day he would wake up, realize what's happening and leave me for good.

I held on to him, tightly. I don't want to let go! Just a little bit, I comforted myself, just a bit more. I'll release him, I swear. I only need this one little thing, this short stolen moment, because it's getting harder for me to stand back and remain quiet. To act like there's nothing between us.

A mournful sob escaped my lips and I had to bite the inside of my mouth to force the rest of it down. I wish I could have a part of him, no matter how small. I don't care what, I just want a reminder of him. So when the time comes for him to leave me, I'll have more than just my memories to comfort me.

Slowly, I untangled myself from my unconscious lover and silently gathered our clothes. I washed him thoroughly, cautiously, making sure I removed all traces of myself from his skin.

I dressed him with care and allowed him to sleep a moment longer, oblivious to everything. Even me. It hurt. It's tearing me inside to know that when he wakes up, he'd have no recollections of me or of our time together.