Ch.22: Love takes time

:: Quinn POV ::

The pain lanced through me, so quick and sudden, I barely had time to register what was going on. I screamed clutching at my stomach and collapsed on my knees. It's time…

I was coming out of the bathroom and heading back to bed when the labor pains started assaulting me. I've been getting weaker and Raziel specifically asked me not to get off the bed or do anything on my own, at least not for now. But I hated being treated like a fragile ornament. I knew I was due any day now but knowing and actually experiencing the fact are two very different things.

"Quinn!" Raziel called from the doorway and was beside me in a flash. "Are you all right? Why didn't you call me if you needed to go?"

"The twins…" I gasped as another strong spasm shot through my system. I grabbed his arm and squeezed tightly to impress the gravity of the situation. "They're coming…"

Raziel looked shocked for one moment before he recovered his senses. Within seconds I was up in his arms and he was carrying me towards the makeshift delivery room they prepared for the birthing. The doctors that Orion hired surrounded me in an instant, connecting me to different machines to monitor my vitals and the progress of the delivery. They were talking too fast for me to follow the flow of conversation but I could sense how dire it was.

"Raziel!" I called out. I need him here with me. I can't do this alone!

Unfortunately, there was no response. I couldn't see or hear him anywhere near me. I panicked and tried to sit up. Strong but gentle arms firmly held me down.

"Calm down, Quinn." Nuri said, her eyes meeting mine.

I could feel her linking with me, taking most of the pain away. But even with Nuri doing that, the pain was quite unbearable. Nuri told me and carefully explained to me about what I'd be experiencing during labor. But damn this pain is like nothing I've ever felt before. I don't know how I'm going to survive the birthing process. This is just awful! Giving birth is not for the faint hearted, for sure.

Don't get me wrong, I love my children but bringing them out into the world is a major pain, not to mention absolutely terrifying. If by some miracle I live through this, I will absolutely not get pregnant ever again!

"I need Raziel!" I cried clawing at Nuri's tender arms. "Please… please… I need him here!"

"He's getting prepared," she answered in that low, calming voice of hers. But right now that tone is not going to cut it. I need Raziel! Another contraction cut through me and I bit hard on my lower lip to keep myself from crying out.

"Just hold a second and he'd be here, okay?" Nuri said, trying to get me to focus on her and not on the doctors, who were preparing my body for the birthing. "Try not to stress, Quinn. Everything is fine. You're in good hands, I promise. Try to conserve your energy as much as you can. You're going to need it later on."

Nuri then placed a warm hand over my forehead and closed her eyes. I could feel a stream of magic course through me, soothing the pain away and at the same time lightly touching the children to make sure they're doing okay.

A sudden surge of power blocked Nuri's attempt to link with one of the twins, to be specific with my dragon baby. The linking was fine as she checked the fae child but once Nuri tried to touch its sibling, the fae child acted up and lashed out at Nuri.

I could feel how they struggled for dominance until Nuri graciously pulled back, exhaustion was visible on her face after the short confrontation. My baby was channeling her own magic to counter Nuri. I don't know how the baby is doing it or how it is possible for a child to be capable of so much. But it seems my daughter is gifted and powerful enough to do such things.

Orion wordlessly stepped forward and took Nuri's place. He linked with me while chanting in some ancient language that I've never known or heard of before. I felt a stream of magic slowly course through me, restoring my depleted energy to a fraction before catioustly breaking through the barrier that now surrounds the children inside of me.

"They're both fine," Orion said, looking down at me after he pulled back his hand. "The little one was upset because she doesn't want anyone to disrupt her sibling until it's time. She is ready but it seems the young Dragon Lord needs more time."

What does that mean?

"Are they going to be alright?" I asked in sudden panic. "I'm in labor now if the baby is not ready then it would be dangerous to operate now wouldn't it?"

"They'd be fine," Orion said gently. "But you'd have to endure the pain until..."

"I don't care about me! Argh!" I exclaimed as another contraction cut through me leaving me shaky and breathless. "I want them to be alright…" I suddenly felt warm tingles in my hand and I looked up to see Raziel looking down at me.

"I'm sorry I had to leave you alone. The doctor insisted I had to be sanitized before I could come in." He said, kissing me on the forehead.

"It's okay," I answered weakly. "You're here now." I know that at the end of this I might not make it, that's why I want to spend my last moments with Raziel. We don't have much time left.

"What's going on? Why haven't they started to operate?" Raziel turned to Orion and even in my befuddled state I could sense the agitation in his tone.

"They're ready to operate," Orion answered calmly. "But your son is still not ready to be born."

"What!" I couldn't stop the cry that tore through my throat as another contraction gripped me. Raziel held my hand tighter and wiped the sweat off my brow.

"How much longer?" He asked Orion as I gasped for breath.

"Another hour," Orion said, looking at the clock mounted on the wall. "Perhaps two..."

The next time the contraction came I was prepared. As the spasm hit I gritted my teeth, hard, and swallowed my cries. I don't want Raziel to worry any more than he should. But he still felt it when my whole body shivered from the force of the pain. His hand started shaking as it held mine.

"Quinn won't last for another hour!" He exclaimed furiously. "We have to operate now!"

I hate to do this to him. This whole episode would hurt him more than me. The pain I'm experiencing at the moment would be nothing compared to his once this is all over.

"Raziel…" I called to get his attention. There's no point wasting time by arguing and getting angry. This course was decided the moment I knew I was carrying another life inside me. I clung to him tightly, silently telling him to believe in me. "I'll do it. I can do it…"

I took one look at him and my heart broke at his undisguised fear and pain etched on his handsome face.

"Quinn, please... Don't do this..." Raziel begged, tears forming in his eyes. He leaned down so we could be closer. "Please…"

I wrapped my arms around him as another surge of pain cut through me. My tears fell freely, endlessly, with his. I hate that I am doing this to him but there is no other way.

"It's alright." I whispered. "You'll be alright…" I know he would be. Raziel would be fine without me and the children would be safe with him.

Raziel hugged me back and held me tightly. "I don't know if I can." He answered, burying his tearstained face on my neck. "I don't think I can, Quinn…"

"You know the first time I saw you at the docks I was completely mesmerized. I knew who you were right away." I said holding him tighter. "The way you looked at me that day melted me on the spot."

We never had the chance to talk about the first time we met and what happened while he was under the trance. I know Raziel wanted to ask about it. What we did, how and when. I could feel he wanted to know everything, to somehow trigger his memories of those times.

I am sorry that we won't be able to discuss it at length, that we wouldn't have a chance to. But I could at least let him know how I felt during those moments. I could at least tell him how important he is to me despite everything that happened in between us.

"The resonance between us was so strong that day I don't think you or I could have ignored it." I said seeing in my mind how he looked that day. How he smiled at me. How my world turned upside down and inside out just by the mere sight of him. "And the first time you wrapped your arms around me I laughed and cried at the same time. It felt like home. I knew in an instant that I finally found the place where I belong. It's right here... in your arms."

Why is it that when it comes to Raziel it seems like I'm always out of time? We seem to always be chasing after each other, barely touching, before we have to run, move and chase each other all over again.

I remembered while he was in a trance, when he didn't know or wasn't aware of everything we did or who we are to each other. I remembered how afraid I was that I'd be losing him too soon and how unfair it felt.

I always felt like I didn't have enough time to spend with Raziel. And when he found out the truth, I thought that was it. The end. I have my memories and I was happy regardless of the pain, thinking what I had was enough. I was wrong. My heart, body and mind screamed for him. My entire being craved Raziel, more than it ever did before.

Losing him, albeit just for a couple of days, was extreme torture. It was so painful I was ready to run away in order to forget. But to my utter surprise, Raziel wouldn't let me go. I don't know what made him change his mind but it doesn't matter. As I said, he is here now and that's all that matters.

"I love you." I breathed out tiredly after another bout of pain shot through my body. "No matter what happens, know that I always loved you…"

:: Raziel POV ::

Quinn's scream pierced through the still air and I hurried towards the bedroom only to find her down on her knees, protectively clutching her stomach.

"Quinn!" I called from the doorway. I didn't waste time and hurried to kneel beside her. "Are you all right? Why didn't you call me if you needed to go?"

"The twins…" Quinn gasped, her face contorting in pain. She grabbed my arm and squeezed tightly, her nails digging in my skin. "They're coming…"

Nuri did say that the twins are almost ready, that they could be born soon. But that was just hours ago! I thought it would be another day, perhaps two, before they're ready to come but it seems like I'm wrong.

I lifted Quinn in my arms and took her to the delivery room. Within seconds I was pushed aside and the doctors connected Quinn to the equipment we brought in weeks ago.

"You need to step back, my lord." One of the doctors said.

"No, I need to be with her!" I answered, not bothering to look at the man, afraid I might harm him. "Quinn needs me!" I could hear her screaming for me. I pushed forward to go to her but the man held me back and it took all my willpower not to murder him on the spot.

"Please, she needs me." I insisted. "I have to go to her!"

"Very well," the man sighed. "But you'll have to be sanitized and purified first."

"Fine. Do whatever you think is necessary but do it quickly!"

You'd think, with all our knowledge of the universe, we'd have developed or conjured something to speed up this process. But no. I had to do it all the old fashioned way. The doctor made me scrub myself clean with purified agents and made me wear some sort of ceremonial robe and purified my body with magic before I could go to see Quinn.

I was beside myself with worry as I was undergoing the lengthy process. It never occurred to me how unusual it was to wear ceremonial robes during childbirth. By the time I managed to get to Quinn's side, she was deathly pale and the hand I grabbed in between mine had grown impossibly cold.

"I'm sorry I had to leave you alone. The doctor insisted I had to be sanitized before I could come in." I said, kissing her forehead. Tightly, closing my eyes praying it would be over soon.

"It's okay," she replied weakly. "You're here now…"

Quinn has been growing weaker since the beginning of the pregnancy, more as the children grew inside of her. As the children developed, we discovered that Quinn's life could be in grave danger due to her body's inability to sustain the immense magic of the children.

At first the children have only been feeding off Quinn's magic. That's why she couldn't conjure even simple spells or perform small charms. There was not much threat to her life then. But once the twins reached a certain level of maturity, they started feeding off Quinn's life force. In simple terms, they started to literally suck the life out of her!

If Quinn had been a normal, regular, human being, she would have died the moment it started. But since she is only part human and more of a supernatural entity, in her own right, Quinn managed to get this far. But she's too tired and drained. I could see and feel her exhaustion as if it were my own. Any more, any longer, and it's going to be fatal. And not even the unspeakable we brought in, to help with the birthing, would be able to bring Quinn back to life once she crosses over.

"What's going on?" I turned to Orion. "Why haven't they started to operate?"

"They're ready to operate. But your son is still not ready to be born." Orion answered.

"What!" Quinn let out another painful wail. Her body convulsed from the pain.

I held her hand tighter and wiped the sweat off her brow. "How much longer?"

"Another hour or perhaps two…"

"Quinn won't last for another hour!" I know I'm being unreasonable but it's the truth. If we allow the situation to continue then it's a sure thing, Quinn would not make it. "We have to operate now!"

"Raziel…" Quinn croaked, clinging on to me. "I'll do it. I can do it…" I could see it in her eyes, she was going to do it even if she had to force it.

Oh gads, she knows! Quinn knows how this would all end. "Quinn, please... Don't do this..." I begged as tears blinded me. I leaned forward to get closer to her. I needed to be closer to her. "Please…"

Quinn wrapped her arms around my neck as another surge of pain coursed through her body. I could feel her tears falling on the bare skin of my neck and shoulder.

"It's alright." She whispered softly in my ear. "You'll be alright…"

I put my arms around her and held on tightly. Why would she do this? How could she do this to me?

"I don't know if I can." I whispered burying my face on her neck and continued to cry, pleading for her to change her mind as I felt the tremors of another bout of contraction assaulting her. "I don't think I can, Quinn…"

I can't contemplate life without Quinn. Everything loses meaning without her there. I know I have to be strong for the children. But I also know that no matter what I do, I won't be as good to them as Quinn would. I will not be better. They need her and I need her, goddamn it!

"You know the first time I saw you at the docks I was completely mesmerized. I knew who you were right away." Quinn said, pulling me tighter. "The way you looked at me that day melted me on the spot."

I've never mustered the courage to ask Quinn about the time we met and all those moments we shared while I was in a trance. Everything between us has been so crazy. And lately, it feels like there's always something more important to discuss. But I've always wanted to know how it was and how she lived it, how and what she felt during those moments.

"The resonance between us was so strong that day I don't think you or I could have ignored it." Quinn continued. "And the first time you wrapped your arms around me I laughed and cried at the same time. It felt like home. I knew in an instant that I finally found the place where I belong. It's right here... in your arms."

How do you respond to something like that? A lot of things happened between us in a very short time. But we've barely begun to connect to each other, to live our lives together. How could she expect me to let her go so soon? How do you let go of someone you've been longing for all your life?

Quinn said she belonged here, in my arms. And I could say the same to her. Quinn means everything to me. If she's gone, where would that leave me?

"I love you." She breathed out tiredly as another bout of pain shot through her body. "No matter what happens, know that I always loved you…"

I choked when I heard those last words. There're a lot of things I want to say to her, secrets that I need to confess. I wanted us to experience a lot of things together. I wanted us to live a full and happy life. Quinn is being unfair by leaving me too early!

I know that Quinn won't change her mind. She's stubborn like that. It's probably one of the most maddening things about her. There'd be nothing I could do or say to make her reconsider. But this side of her, this firm resolution, is also one of the things I love about Quinn.

I know her reasons. I need more time with Quinn but I can understand how her infuriating mind works. I don't like it but I have to accept it. I love and respect Quinn more than myself or anyone in this world. After all this, after everything she went through to get here, if I try to dissuade Quinn by using myself and touching her weakness, it would be nothing but an insult to her resolve to see this through. I just have to trust that we'd be able to save her in time.

"I love you, Quinn." Was all I could say, all I was capable of uttering at the moment. I repeated those words, over and over, so she'd know and understand how true and real it was.

I cannot take away her pain. I can't carry this burden for Quinn. I might not be able to save her life when the time comes. But I can make her feel loved as much as I can, for as long as it's possible.

I still believe Quinn would live through this ordeal, even if she's already given up hope and was saying her goodbyes. I'm hoping we won't have to resort to drastic measures but if the situation calls for it, I would not have second thoughts.

We did find a solution for Quinn's current condition. But the solution we found was too risky. Still, I'm willing to do anything at this point. I'd give up my life for hers if that's what it takes to keep Quinn alive and breathing.