Ch.26: Love is endless and divine

:: Quinn POV ::

I never thought I'd open my eyes again. Frankly, I never believed I'd live. But once I felt the sting of the blinding light, burning the back of my eyes, I knew I was alive. I survived. How?

"Raziel!" I jerked up from bed and frantically looked around. I was back in our room. Alone.

Fear gripped my chest and I jumped off the bed in search of my mate. I fell on the floor, my limbs unable to support my full weight, numbed from inactivity.

How long have I been out?

I pushed all thoughts away from my mind and just focused on my breathing. Something about my body felt different. I wasn't hurt or anything but I feel like a part of me has been carved away and replaced with another.

What the hell happened?

The last I thought I remember was holding the twins in my arms. They were so precious and dearly loved, I wanted them to remember my touch no matter how fleeting. The image of Raziel's handsome face was my last vision, as it should be. I thought then that if I were to die I'd die content, with my children in my arms and the man I love as the last sight I got to see.

But where is he now? Why is he not here?

I know it might be unfeeling but I'm not worried about the children. I know they would be safe. They're not just my children but important figures to two races of supernatural beings. Mauve is a fae princess and in time would be queen, Puck told me so. And Asher is one of the last Dragon Lords, next to his father and uncle.

If anything happens to me or Raziel, there would be a lot of people who'd be keeping the children safe until they could fend for themselves. Most especially, they would always have each other.

Once I got my breathing and senses under control, I tried to stand up again. This time I was successful, more balanced. I still need the wall to keep me up but I managed to reach the door without falling on my face. I slowly turned the knob and walked outside of the room.

The house was quiet but I could hear people laughing outside. The most glorious sound I could hear, in my current state, is the sound of Raziel's full and deep laughter. I used it as a beacon, my guiding light. I know that if I follow the sound I would be able to see him and my children. And all would be well.

"My princess!" Puck exclaimed when he caught sight of me. In a flash he was beside me, supporting my body with his. "I was just going to come and check in on you."

"Thank you," I whispered.

"You have to go back to bed, my princess. You're not well enough to walk around."

"I want to see my family, please." I looked at Puck and pleaded with him with my eyes. He turned away, as if burned by my fervent gaze. But he held me tighter, more secured.

"There's no need to plead with me, my princess, I am nothing but a humble servant. Puck is just a slave." He said. "Command me, if you will, and I will do as you bid…"

I still don't understand how his mind works. During my confinement before the birth of the children, Puck stayed beside me whenever I'm alone. He entertained me with stories within the faery kingdom and although I haven't been there, I feel like I've walked and lived for years in the enchanted forest because of him.

Puck would take liberties like brushing my hair, washing my feet or crafting me jewelries that I would never need. He would lie on the bed beside me but he was always careful not to touch me. He would never make skin to skin contact without my consent.

Puck would do something if I ordered or commanded him. But he balks whenever I ask nicely, beg or plead. It's damned confusing, a bit uncanny and extraordinary but perhaps, that's who Robin Goodfellow is.

"Take me to my family, Robin." I commanded. "Now!"

Puck nodded and helped me out of the house. I could still hear the laughter in the air and the closer I got the more nervous I felt. What would I find? Is this reality or just a dream?

For some reason Puck froze by the end of the lawn. I looked at him curiously but he just smiled at me in return.

"I'm afraid this is as far as I can go, my princess." He said somberly. "I am not allowed to go further than this."

I don't understand what he meant but he cautiously and slowly untangled himself from me before executing a bow and giving me an encouraging nudge forward.

"Go ahead, my princess." He smiled widely. "They're anxiously waiting for you."

I stared at him for another moment before turning to where my family stood. I took a tentative step forward then another and another.

Everyone was there. Raziel, Syrath, Orion and Nuri, even Nile. And I immediately noticed what they were laughing at.

Mauve was sitting on the ground surrounded by colorful blooms with pixies dancing around her. The pixies were small, each standing at barely five inches, but Puck once told me that they could grow to life size at will and serve only one master in their lifetime. And I believe these ones are just a few of many who would come seeking Mauve in the future to vie for a position to serve her.

The four, going round and round, were glowing brightly, each working vigorously to capture their mistress' attention. But at the moment, Mauve only has eyes for her brother.

Asher was ten feet off the ground, beating his little wings, flying as fast and as high as his small body would allow. It surprised me that Asher could already fly.

Raziel once told me that wyrmlings are born able to see and hear. They also have wings and for the time being, Asher wouldn't be able to hide his wings like mature dragons could. Raziel also told me that Asher would not be able to fly until he's about forty, when he turns from a wyrmling to a juvenile dragon. Which is why it's such a shock to see him soaring freely, around the garden, at his age.

But it seems Mauve's protective instinct has not waned. Whenever Asher tried to push past his limits and aimed to fly higher than his wings and body would allow, Mauve would shoot a ball filled with magic from her finger. The ball would gently explode into tiny colorful flowers in front of Asher, making him lower his height and growl in frustration at his sister. He would fly down and show his vexation by beating his wings hard, sending gusts of wind in Mauve's direction and sending flower petals flying everywhere.

Mauve would only giggle. She would then retaliate by summoning a vine to wrap around one of Asher's legs and pulling him down, slowly and carefully, towards her.

I couldn't help the laughter that bubbled out of me after seeing their antics. I never thought that I'd ever get to witness and see them like this. The children turned at the sound of my laughter and before I knew it Asher was flying towards me with Mauve not far behind him, her butterfly wings carrying her slower than her brother's.

I held them in my arms and both buried their little faces on either side of my neck. They smell like wildflowers and honey, I couldn't help the tears that stream down my cheeks at the feel of their warm small bodies close to mine.

I stilled when I felt someone wipe my cheeks dry. I didn't have to look to know it was Raziel. My body's reaction to him has always been strong since the first time we met

"I missed you," he whispered as he brought his arms around me and the children, resting his forehead against mine. "I missed you so much, Quinn."

I smiled and leaned further into his embrace to bring our faces closer. "Am I dreaming, Raz?" I asked. "If I am, don't ever wake me up again."

Raziel chuckled and cupped my face with his hands. "You're not dreaming silly. Here, does this feel real to you?" I felt him connect our lips together and chuckled when mine clung to his longer than intended.

"I don't know..." I smiled a bit breathless, finally looking at his eyes. "Maybe you should keep convincing me until I am certain and thoroughly believe you."

The twins decided they've had enough of being in between their parents when they're trying to be intimate. They squirmed in my arms and immediately flew away once I loosened my hold. Raziel and I laughed at their retreating forms.

"Should I convince you some more?" Raziel teased wrapping both his arms around my waist and pulling my body flush against his.

"I could use a little more convincing." I nodded, bringing my arms around his neck.

Raziel leaned down and kissed me, more passionately and more insistently this time. His lips were relentless and firm and oh so sweet. When his tongue invaded my mouth and danced with mine, I lost all the energy I have on my legs. But Raziel held me tighter, kept me closer.

"I love you." He whispered hoarsely, his lips still a hair's breadth away from mine. "I love you so much, Quinn."

"I love you too, Raziel." I whispered back. "Always…"

:: Syrath POV ::

I knew she'd want to know because for Quinn it's never that simple. She cannot take things as they are, she has to understand it. Quinn would be hurt by the truth but she would not believe a beautiful lie either. I hate to admit it but it's one of the things I loved about her.

It's been a few days since Quinn woke up. Raziel has been hovering like a mother hen and I'm certain it's driving Quinn crazy. But she understands that my brother needs it. The constant fussing, the worrying, Raziel needs to do it and get it out of his system. Otherwise he would always be stuck on the moment when he almost lost her.

I tried to stay as far to the side as I could but they wouldn't let me. They'd always include me in their sphere, whether I was willing or not. Making me feel more guilty and undeserving of the love and trust they give me so willingly.

When Quinn asked me to go for a walk, just the two of us, I knew it was time. She would demand to know the truth of how I saved her life and after that, I would have to leave.

"I could command him to retract it," she whispered.

"No." I answered firmly. "I may be a lot of despicable things, Quinn, but I'm a man of my word. I made the bargain and Puck came through for me. Now, I have to deliver what I promised him."

"Is it only that, Sy?" Quinn asked, looking straight at me. And I regret doing this to her. It's like I'm always putting her in situations where she has no choice but to endure for my sake.

"I don't know what you mean," I answered, turning away from her pained look.

I guess it's just as well. I should leave soon because whether I admit it or not seeing Quinn like this, helpless and distressed for my sake, makes me incredibly happy. It's perverse and wrong but I feel like with this I could bind her to me longer. And that's not what I want. Not really.

I have to forget my feelings for Quinn. I have to release her, not just for her and my sake but for Raziel and the children as well. And the more I think about it, the more I'm convinced that I'm doing the right thing.

"You're leaving soon, aren't you?" Quinn said, holding one of my hands in between hers.

"I'd come back." I answered.

"Don't lie to me, Syrath. Not now. Not ever…" She said, lightly squeezing my hands. My heart constricted at the knowledge of how well she knows me. "I've got a feeling that if I let you leave, I won't see you again."

"I'm sorry." I whispered, touching my forehead to hers.

"Don't be," she whispered softly.

"You know I can't stay." I continued. "If I do, I'd always be in the way."

Quinn sighed and lifted her hand to cup my face. "You're so silly sometimes. So intelligent and worldly but at the same time so dumb and naïve. You can't hide anything from me, Sy. I know... I can feel it. Your feelings have changed. You're being stubborn because you're afraid."

"I don't know what you're talking about!" I hissed, pulling her close to me. Hugging her close, holding her tight, because I know this would be the last time.

"That's right, Syrath, let it all out." Quinn briefly connected her lips to mine before stepping back and letting me go. "I'm not going to tell you that you're making a huge mistake because you have to realize it on your own. I want you to find your true self, Sy, the one that got lost when Alana died."

"That part of me died with her, Quinn." I answered bitterly. "I would never be that person again."

"It didn't die. You just locked it away. I touched it, Sy. I saw it so don't try to convince me otherwise."

"I still love you," I really can't lie to her, not anymore. But Quinn is right. My feelings have changed.

Quinn smiled and turned back towards the house. "I know... And I still love you." She whispered as she walked away.

Quinn had grown stronger and wiser. If this happened a few months ago she would have begged me to stay. She'd be in tears and just agree with what I want without giving me a glimpse of what she's really thinking or what she really feels. Quinn was weak and selfish like that. But now, she's strong enough to let me go and to tell me, face to face, that I'm making a mistake.

Perhaps Quinn is right. But there's no way around this for me. And besides, I want to do this. I have to leave. If I happen to be wrong in the end by then I'd be man enough to accept that I failed and that it was my fault. But for now, I want to be free.

I watched Quinn's retreating figure until she disappeared before turning to the man waiting for me in the shadows.

"Spying on me again, Robin?" I mocked as he stepped forward.

"I already told you once, my lord." He said, stalking towards me. "Spying is not the worst habit I have."

Puck stopped once we're toe to toe, his eye color the shade of the stormy sea. He's confused, I could tell. About what, I do not know. But it's a good look on him. For someone as devilish and traitorous as Puck, seeing him rattled is quite a sight to behold.

"Why didn't you ask her to command me?" He asked, taking me by surprise. "I was sure you would. I planned that you would, why didn't you?"

So that was it. Puck has this situation mapped in his head and with one simple act, I disrupted it all and it confuses him.

I couldn't help but laugh at that. I laughed until there were tears in my eyes and I couldn't laugh anymore. I think the next one hundred years wouldn't be so hard and trying as I thought.

Instead of answering his question I turned and walked away, towards the direction away from the house.

"Take me away, Robin Goodfellow." I said, looking back at him over my shoulder. "Your one hundred years and a day starts today."