Chapter 4

I hopped on the train as soon as it arrived and found my seat. It was a nice seat by the window, which made me happy. I like to sit by the window, that way you can watch the world moving fast and you can think about everything in those moments. Just you and your thoughts. Also, you can pretend like you're and a music video when you're listening to music at the same moment. Let's just say it is perfect.

Trees outside the window were moving and my thoughts had taken over my mind. I was planning on what I am going to say to that bastard who betrayed me. I was feeling the rage in my whole body and I couldn't wait to finally be there. As I was falling deeper in my thoughts I started to realize, that it may actually not be the best idea to do. What if I will forgive him at the moment, I'll see him, or worse, what if I fall in love with him again? No that can't happen. And as panic started to take control over my body, my plan was fading away like a cloud in the sky that's blown away by the wind.

When the train arrived at the Paddington station, I completely lost all my courage to say anything to Max. I got off the train thinking about what I am going to do now. I was about to break down, so I just sat down on a bench nearby. My breath was fast, and my heart was beating like crazy. 'Lily, calm down, we don't have to do this, just be cool, okay? Remember what you had in mind, your plan. Now get up and find that little piece of shit, oh I am sorry I meant Max, and tell him what you think about him!' I didn't know who was talking to me, maybe my heart, but it was probably my mind. Anyhow it gave me my courage back. I got up from the bench and headed to Max's appartement.

I wasn't looking right nor left, walking through the streets as it was yesterday when I was there for the last time. Nothing has changed. Although his building was still modern and beautiful, I was disgusted by the look of it now. I read the doorbell labels, but I haven't found Max's name. Someone just opened the front door of the building. It was a nice-looking young woman. I stopped her. 'Excuse me madam, but does by any chance Max Davis live here?'

'How do you know him?' said the lady.

'He was my friend in high school, do you know him?' I was confused.

'Yes, of course I know him…I am his...ehm...ex-wife. What is your name?' she replied.

'My name is Lily Williams; I am sorry did you say ex-wife?'

'You are Lily? That Lily? The Lily he cheated on me with?'

'I am so so sorry, I didn't mean it to happen, I was drunk and well…I love him, but whatever, those feelings are gone. He didn't tell me he was married; I would have never let that happen if I had known he was taken. Please forgive me...' my voice started to break up.

'It's okay I forgive you, actually, I wanted to find you and thank you, because he was an idiot, and thanks to you, I've moved on. I am happily married now.' She showed me her ring finger with a beautiful diamond ring on it.

'Wow,' I sighed, 'it is beautiful. So, you got divorced because of me?'

'Somehowyes, but I wanted to get a divorce even before that accident you two had. I knew that that marriage wasn't leading anywhere. I wanted to settle down and have children, but he was barely home, always at some parties, he didn't take me to. Your affair was just the perfect opportunity to finally make it happen.'

I was surprised, I didn't expect this when I decided to come there. What was I supposed to say? He seemed like a nogoodnik. I already knew that, but I wanted to tell him what I think of him. Everything must be complicated right.

'Okay, do you know where I could find him at least?' I asked her politely.

'Oh, you silly girl if I can give you a piece of wise advice, don't look for him! Forget him! He will ruin your life. Believe me, I have experience. He is no good, okay, do you understand?' she sounded very serious.

'I…I guess I do…'

'See, I knew you are a smart girl…woman, never mind. I have to go now, but it was a pleasure to meet you, and once again, thank you.' And with those words, she left me there by the front door looking like a total moron. I stayed like that for like five more minutes, because I needed to organize my mind. I didn't understand what was going on at the moment.

As I was standing there I slowly but surely started to feel something in my stomach. I was super hungry. How come I didn't notice. I guess my mind was too busy soaking up all those information. I was thinking about where I should eat when suddenly I remembered that pizza place, where we met with Max back then. It seemed like a perfect place to end this era of my life, right where it all started, at Delfino.