Life's not easy when your mum's nuts, your uncle is becoming your aunt, and one of your crushes could -- and probably would -- break your face if he found out how you felt about him. That's Tab's life, though, malevolent gods and all. His text-flirting with Demi, the brother of his best friend, is going nowhere: Demi already has a boyfriend and anyway, who dates their best friend's twin? But then, the pining after Nick is going nowhere either, because Nick probably likes gay-bashing on Friday nights for fun. He's gorgeous, but he's dangerous, and Tab knows better than that. So what's a bit of harmless flirting, when one is taken and the other is straight? It's just a bit of fun. That is until Demi is suddenly single, and Nick is not looking as straight and scary as he was before.

The Suicidal Peanut

Yeah I’ll accept that! Demi replied. Like ur any better. Artists. Pft.


Tab smirked. Gonna go be a mad scientist?


Tab rolled his eyes. Maxi said similar things, but she wasn’t as dumb as she made herself out to be. Demi was probably the same. But then, he was in the Army Reserves, so maybe he really was that dumb. He couldn’t have been in long—you needed to be eighteen, and Maxi had only turned eighteen last September—but Tab was convinced the military made you stupid by association.


The slow, marching death of moronity. That had a nice ring to it. He paused to note it down before replying with, Gonna blow up enemy nations then?


Tab sniggered, without quite meaning to. Demi was definitely weird, but he supposed it was a nice kind of weird. The gods were being favourable with Demi, at least.


Chapter 15