Chapter 18

Although I find euphoria during this moment in the backyard with the landscaper, I push him away, unable to cheat on the mechanic, unwilling to ruin whateverI have with the younger man. Dayton is not my boyfriend, though, I realize. We are not monogamous. Neither of us has fully committed ourselves to the other with a label-- boyfriend, lovers, fuck buddies…something. Yet, I feel dirty connected to Michael Block, deceiving Dayton to the fullest. I can’t continue this intense and over-driven sexual act with the young owner of Block’s Landscaping. Unfaithfulness prompts me to back away from Block’s handsomeness and stare dumbly at him, quietly.

“What’s going on, Nino? I thought you wanted to fuck around with me?”