Another year has passed for the Icicle family. Again, Jonah and his boyfriend Sandy travel to Lake Erie to spend Christmas with Jonah’s family. Brother-in-law Bobo needs rescuing from the mall from an angry Santa. Sister Willa is dog-sitting a problematic Reginald. And Bill, the patriarch, continues to hide from his family. As for Jonah’s pushy mother Pam, she has a special Christmas gift for him this year: Jonah’s ex-boyfriend, NFL quarterback Ricky, is in town and will be spending the holidays with them!<br><br>During this three-day trip, Sandy and Ricky learn to despise each other, and Jonah struggles to have a festive Christmas. If Pam has her way, though, Jonah will dump Sandy and marry the quarterback. As his Christmas spirit dwindles, Jonah finds himself torn between the two men. Which boyfriend will it be, new or old?

Keeping Up with the Icicles

“At least it wasn’t your throwing arm. You wouldn’t be where you are today if it were.”


Ricky. It’s all about Ricky on the stairwell to the second floor. Ricky this. Ricky that. Fucking Ricky. Jonah’s starting to hate him.


“I’m going upstairs to change my socks. My feet are freezing.” Barefoot, Sandy slides past Jonah with a pair of cotton socks swinging in his right hand. He enters the dining, the living room, and makes a right, heading to the stairwell and Ricky, who is positioned at Pam’s side.


Jonah hears Sandy’s footsteps on the stairwell. “Excuse me, Pam. Excuse me, Ricky,” Sandy says.


Pam tells Ricky, “The tour is over. I’ll be adding more of you to the wall soon. I was hoping you could pose for a few new pictures. What do you say?”


Chapter 24