Go Away

Brianna's POV

I was hoping that Faye will follow me as I got out of the bus but when I turned around, she was not there. A little bit, I was glad that she didn't follow me because I know I will forgive her this instant. At the same time I wish she did so I would know that she's really sorry. I guess this just proves that she's not and she has already made up her mind about everything.

I continued walking to my class and met Sofia by the entrance of the building again.

"Hey, sizzy." She interlocked her arm with mine. "You look glum. What's up?"

"Nothing."

"Did you had a fight with Faye?"

"Am I that transparent?"

Sofia chuckled, "oh my. What did you two fought about? Hold on." She stopped walking so I stopped too. "This is not about last night, right? Is she mad at me? Did you have to defend me from her? Do you want me to talk to her instead? Tell me!"

"N-no. None of that. It's not about that or about you."

"Hmm?"

"Well, kinda. It started when I asked about s*x. That if we both feel the tension between us, if we could just get on with it."

"And?"

"She said she was glad you came in and that didn't happen."

Her mouth fell, "no?"

"Ugh, I don't even know why I am feeling this way. Why should I care if she doesn't want s*x with me? So? There are other people out there whom I could do it with! Plus, I only met her like what...two weeks ago? She's not worth this much energy." I slammed the door of my locker open.

"Wow. You must be really frustrated."

I slammed the door close after getting what I need.

"And very horn--"

"Shut up." I moved past her. "See you at the end of the day."

"Not lunch?"

"Busy!"

During our break time, I went to the toilet to refresh myself. I stared at the mirror to look at my reflection.

Wow, dark circles.

The past few nights have been a bit difficult for me to sleep. I guess I was somehow traumatized with what happened to me that somehow gives nightmares.

I am not scared about Faye. Not her. I was scared of the angels. I know they are watching and it would have comforted me if I only know that the reason why they're wathing me ws to protect me. Instead, the reason why they are watching me is to keep me away from Faye. Somehow to tease us both.

They want to see me die.

That's all I could think of. All day.

"Are you alright?"

I got confused to where the voice was coming from. I stared at the mirror and from it I saw Faye's reflection. She was leaning her back on one of the cubicles while her arms are crossed over her chest.

"How long have you been in there?" I asked.

"I've been following you the whole time."

I turned so I could look at her. "What?"

"I felt guilty saying all those terrible words to you. But I am serious, Brianna. These hands..." she looked at them. "They bear the weight of our world. I want to escape from this already."

"What happens if I do stop reincarnating? If it really worked? Do I return as an angel again? Then you become a normal human? Then what? We still can't be together? You won't remember me because you are human while as an angel, I am stuck with those memories?"

"I-I never thought of that."

"Then maybe you should start thinking about that." I opened the faucet so I could wash my hands and face.

"The angels really didn't tell us anything when we were punished. They just said that we are on these limbo and that's it. If I succeed, I win..." She looked at me with sorry eyes. "...You are suffering more than me..."

I also remember those words from the angel. From dying over and over again...I will get stuck with those memories too once I became an angel again.

My life sucks.

Angel or not.

I turned off the faucet and left the toilet.

Faye followed me. "Wait, Brianna!"

"Don't follow me. They can't see you, right? I don't want to look ridiculous talking to myself."

"No, they can see me."

I looked at her. This tall woman in front of me? With her long silver hair. White and soft skin...people might think she's a goddess of some sort.

"Look, I know I said harsh words to you and I am really sorry about that. I should have taken into consideration how you would feel. I was selfish."

"You learn your lesson fast, huh?"

"I can't believe that even living for a thousand years, there are more lessons to learn."

I just shrugged and walked again to return to my classroom.

"So, am I forgiven or not?"

I didn't answer. Is she? Does she deserve forgiveness?

"I can't let this day end with you getting mad at me. That's the last thing I want to happen. Even in our past lives, when we have a bit of misunderstanding...we talk it out and made sure that we sleep with a heart at peace. So I am not going to stop apologizing to you until you forgive me and we both could sleep peacefully tonight."

"There's one way I could forgive you."

"Okay." Her face brightened.

"Sleep in my bed tonight."

Faye froze.

I raised a brow. "You can't do that?"

"Uhmm..."

"What?"

"In one condition."

"Condition?"

"There will be a huge pillow between us."

"Ha?"

"I really still don't want anything to happen between us."

"I just asked you to sleep on my bed not sleep with me. What the hell, Faye? I am not a wh*re."

"I-it's not you. It's...it's for me..." she covered her face shyly. She can't look straight into my eyes as she said those words.

I don't know how to react to that. The only reason why I want her to sleep on my bed was so maybe I could sleep peacefully again just like two weeks ago. Sleeping 'with' her hasn't come into my mind. Not until she mentioned about it.

"You...are..."

"I know." Faye felt guilty. "But yes. I agree. I will sleep at your house tonight but with lots of pillows."

"Just sleep on the floor if that will make you feel any better." I turned around and continued walking to my classroom.