Chapter 10: Family Time

“I need you to make the sheet straight!” I shouted to Jasper, who was working my last nerve.

“It’s a white sheet with the wind blowing. It can only be as straight as I am half the time!” Jasper shouted, regarding his fluid sexuality.

I rolled my eyes, trying not to explode. Wes and Jasper have been at my house all morning. The two of them have been helping me set up the backyard for movie night. The other night when the kids and I were on the couch, I started thinking that we needed a family night by ourselves. So, I came up with the brilliant idea to transform our backyard into a magical movie-watching experience.

October is halfway over. Halloween turns into a madhouse with taking Ariel trick-or-treating. After Halloween, the weather starts becoming unbearable. If we didn't enjoy the cool air while we had it we'd be spending the winter in absolute misery.

“Wes! That firepit should’ve been set up an hour ago. How hard is it to put wood in a pit and light it on fire? God, where’s the evil geniuses Seth and Serena when I need them!”

Stomping throughout the backyard to set up the atmosphere is turning me into a monster. Jasper has seen me explode on more than one occasion. One time when Serena was doing a spelling bee in middle school, I got a flat tire on the way there. I nearly bashed in the window of a car that wouldn’t stop to help. Jasper had to stop me from committing aggravated assault on the AAA employee that took too long to fix the tire.

Wes, on the other hand, has never heard me raise my voice. I’ve kept him at arm’s length since the moment I met him. The only time I speak to him or have him around is when we’re doing schoolwork. To say he was surprised when I called him this morning would be an understatement. He practically jumped at the opportunity to help me with this. He said that doing this for the kids was a good idea and that he was excited to help.

“The kids only have an hour left with a babysitter. After that, they’re officially unaccompanied minors, so I need you two to get this done! This night needs to be perfect for my kids!” I shouted.

“I’ll go pick up the kids from the playground and let the babysitter go home before she gets trichotillomania from Seth’s pranks,” Jasper said, already halfway out the back gate.

Wes silently kept making the backyard look nice. We set up lights around the trees. Pillow, blankets, and bedsheets decorate the ground. I don’t want the kids laying in the dirt all night, so I got a bunch of extra bedsheets from the closet and from Jasper.

“Remember a few weeks ago when you told me you weren’t legendary?” Wes asked. I nodded, not understanding why this is important. I only have a short amount of time before it starts getting dark. “The stuff you do for the kids seems pretty legendary to me. I don’t know an older sister that would do the things you do.”

“Thanks. My kids deserve the world, so I try and give it to them,” I said.

Wes stuffed his hands into the pockets of his jeans. He has completely stopped helping. I continued setting up the desserts for the kids. We’re going to be making s’mores and eating ice cream. Eric’s latest installment of the money went into my account a few days ago, so I did some extra grocery shopping the other day.

“Jasper was telling me about a Halloween carnival happening next weekend. I was wondering if you wanted to go,” Wes said, breaking the silence between us. I aggressively fluffed the pillow on the ground making sure they were perfect. I hesitated on my answer causing Wes to speak up again. “The kids would love it and I can help you watch all five of them. Just in case one of them doesn’t want to go on one of the rides, or they get scared.”

Once again, I kept quiet.

Is he trying to ask me out?

I don’t know if my silence is coming off as a rejection, but I don’t know how to answer that question. It wasn’t even a question. He was wondering if I wanted to go. He added the part about the kids after I kept quiet.

Dammit! I need to say something!

“I’ll see if the kids want to go,” I said.

***

The kids were all waiting in the kitchen because I refused to let them see the backyard. We had our dinner early because as soon as it got dark out, I wanted to bring them outside for their surprise.

Oliver kept complaining that I was keeping him away from his treehouse.

I made all the kids close their eyes and walked them out into the backyard.

“S’mores!” Ariel and Oliver shouted before I gave them all permission to open their eyes.

The rest of the kids all opened their eyes to see the beautiful scene in front of them. Each of them claimed a spot on the blankets. We all huddled together, letting a Disney movie mindlessly play on the projector. The kids were all obsessed with eating the sugary desserts that I’ve set up for tonight.

“What’s the occasion?” Seth asked, quirking an eyebrow over his marshmallow that was currently on fire.

“Just wanted to have a family night. Once it gets cold, we won’t be able to come out here much,” I shrugged.

“Oh good. I thought you were going to tell us that you’re running off to get married to that surfer,” Serena laughed, keeping focused on helping Ariel with her s’mores.

I rolled my eyes. Wes has been around the house more often than I would like. We work on our project in my room, while the kids are busying themselves with their own work. He’s spoken to the kids in passing, but they all shy away from strangers. Except for Serena. She’d have a conversation with Wes about our upcoming wedding. A wedding that’s nonexistent and embarrassing to hear coming from your younger sister.

We settled into a groove of making s’mores and pretending to watch the movie. Derek wanted to read, but he enjoyed Disney movies as much as the rest of us.

“Lucy?” Derek questioned. “Can we go to the Halloween carnival next week?”

“Would you guys really want to go?”

All of them nodded their heads. “It’ll be fun. We can go on the rides, get scared in the haunted house, plus, Lucy might find herself a real-life prince charming,” Serena smirked.

“Prince charming? At a Halloween carnival? Have you not been paying attention to the movies we watch?” I questioned.

“All I’m saying is that you never know who may be there,” she grinned.

Seth took the next turn at persuading us to go. “Your soon-to-be boyfriend makes a compelling argument. He said it’d be a fun family experience.”

Sneaky boy.

He went to the kids when I didn’t give him a proper answer about the carnival.

I guess we have to go to the carnival now. I can’t disappoint the kids if they actually want to go.

My mind went into overdrive trying to think of everything that needed to be done by next Saturday. The carnival is a week away. If I do three loads of laundry next week, then I won’t need to do any on Saturday. Ariel wants to wear the same Ariel the Mermaid costume from last year, so that saves us some money. Derek has an appointment with his doctor to adjust his ADHD medication on Wednesday. Serena has mathletes meetings on Tuesday and Wednesday after school, so I can work around those agendas for the day.

What else needs to be done?

What more do I have to do before I get a minute to breathe?

“Lucy?” A voice said, snapping me from the mental reorganization of my life. “Lucy? Lucy!”

“What?” I snapped.

“Are you okay? You looked like you were holding your breath,” Seth questioned.

I shook the scheduling out of my head. Once all the kids fall asleep in the tents, then I can go about making a schedule for the week. Whenever the kids and I make weekend plans, we plan the week prior to making sure nothing goes wrong. It doesn’t always work, but it’s a system we’ve learned to deal with.

“I’m fine. I’m sorry, let’s just watch the movie,” I sighed.

***

The kids all fell asleep, except for Serena and me. We stayed awake cleaning the backyard so that the bugs and animals wouldn’t make a home here. We put out the fire and helped get all the kids into the tents for the night. Camping with the Hastings’ means you sleep in a tent.

“You should ask Wes on a date,” Serena said, completely out of the blue.

“Yeah, right,” I snorted. “Why would I do that?”

“Because you look at him the same way Seth looks at skateboards and firecrackers,” Serena smirked. “I see the way you stare at him when he’s reading a book. It’s not hard to see that you like him.”

“One, that’s not true. Two, I’m not having this conversation with my little sister,” I sighed.

My admiring of Wes when he’s not looking has apparently been spotted. Thankfully, Wes doesn’t seem to notice.

Serena has the notion that if we pretend that life is normal, then it will become normal. I don’t believe in the idea of finding my happily ever after. It’s not in the cards for me. I was dealt a terrible hand at the beginning of my life, and I’ve come to accept it. Nothing’s going to change in my life. We all strive to stay afloat while still living happily as a family.

According to Serena, life doesn’t need to be taken so seriously. The two of us have never been able to talk about boys. I’ve never shown interest in any and neither has Serena.

“Not having this conversation because it’s not true, or because you like Wes and feel like you shouldn’t,” Serena smirked.

“It’s late. Get to sleep because I don’t want to tell you anything about my personal life, at least without some alcohol in my system,” I said.

“Funny.” Serena rolled her eyes at me. “Too bad you’ve never sipped alcohol in your life.”

Thinking about Wes is starting to mess with my entire life. I have one focus and one focus only. My kids. I can’t let myself get distracted by a guy. Serena may think that I have an opportunity to pursue these unknown feelings, but I can’t.

I just can’t.