Chapter 9: Hike to ♂️Dungeon♂️. Part 1

Two days later, evening.

I calmly ate borscht, or something similar to it. It still tasted the same, though I didn't remember it much.

- Are you serious? Why did you ask about the dungeon if you weren't going to go there?

- There's a time for everything, and it won't be hard to clean it up. And I haven't eaten proper food in a long time, only fucking dogs!!!!

- Are you so confident in your abilities, saying such a thing?

- Yeah, by the way, what's your name?

- Atys, it's a little late for that.

- Nice to meet you, I'm Kira Yoshikage!

- That's a strange name.

- ... Well, to be honest, it's not mine, I borrowed it from a great man. By the way, how's Raud?

- They say he got drunk after his injury and disappeared somewhere. Probably went to the dungeon to find an artifact that can cure him.

- As I recall, artifacts are items that can give their owner a certain power or ability, do they have a level limit?

- Uh, yeah.

Immediately, a pang in my heart.

"Fucking rpg system!!! I wish the creature that invented it would have three days of diarrhea!!!!!

ΩΩ An hour passed ΩΩ

- * Slurp * Haaah * Finally some proper tea, not boiled dogcone blood.

Attis stared at me in surprise.

- You drank monster blood?

- I mean, the fact that I ate dogs doesn't confuse you.... But I'll answer, yes, there wasn't even any water, so there was nothing to do. But now I'm full. Actually, it's weird that a dragon would ask me that.

* Hrum *

I was munching on a cookie, drinking my tea, when suddenly I was asked the expected question.

- What do you mean, "out there"?

- Well, it was a city-like area with endless monsters, there might have been a town or village in the distance, the local king even wanted to kill me, but luck wasn't on his side. Anyway, it's a location to level up aliens, but due to a mistake I found myself imprisoned for a long time, forced to survive in hell. Every day could have been my last, but I didn't give up. Fighting when I was deathly tired, eating monsters since there was no other food, all to be here. Even though I'm hypersilent now, I'm not happy about it, because I've been ripped out of my home world, and I'm not likely to see my parents, not even my asshole friends.... * Exhale * I guess that's it. Thanks for listening.

- ... How long were you there?

- Uh, well, over 20 years. It's kind of scary that I've spent most of my life in that place. Well, I guess we can go to the dungeon now. Oh, yeah, if anything, you're paying.

I walked calmly out of the building.

Ω Night, near the dungeon Ω

- I'm so sleepy! I should have slept and then gone.

- We should go now, no one will see us here at this hour.

We were moving slowly toward the dungeon, and I could sense its location thanks to my Force, when several monsters suddenly jumped out.

[ Race: Thathiro

Level: 33]

" The level is still as low as ever, and they're also nasty!

- Extermination.

All that was left of the small group of monsters were bloody puddles.

- You're good.

- I know," I said tiredly.

As I approached the tree, I sensed a portal beneath it that led to the dungeon.

* Boom *

[Location: Iphen Valley Dungeon]

I calmly tore out the tree and jumped into the portal, and Atys followed me.

Ω In the Dungeon Ω

- * Crunch * All right, Crunch, now you can go wild * Crunch. You can stay here, or you can follow the trail of monsters, and I'll be on my way.

* Boom *

Ω POV Atis Ω

- Why did I come down here?

I looked in the direction he'd run and there were monster parts lying around.

"You joined a group, too.

- Well, I'll follow the remains of the monsters.

Ω End POV Ω

A few seconds passed.

" I've already killed over two hundred monsters, but I only got a few experience points! I can only hope for the boss. Wait, what's that?

There was a small ball of bluish color on the ground, with a small amount of energy emanating from it.

"Could it be an artifact? But what if it's something dangerous? I'll try touching it with my sword.

* Poke *

"Nothing, but I still don't want to touch it, so what do I do?

Suddenly from around the corner came the solution to the problem, Atis.

- Atis, take that balloon over there.

He narrowed his eyes and asked:

- Why don't you pick it up yourself?

- I'm on a rollback.

"Genius as always.

- Hmm, look me in the eye.

" And he's not bad, using that dirty trick, but I've spent more than 20 years with monsters, I won't be so easy to figure out!

Ten seconds passed.

" I'm going to laugh now! Ahahahahahahahahahahahahaha, god, I'm, I'm, I'm about to, I can't take it.

- Oh, okay.

"Thank me, just one more second and I would have laughed.

Atis calmly walked over to the balloon and picked it up as there was a sudden flash of light

- What is it? Is that an artifact?

- Yeah, it says gender changer. I wonder if I can change to wooden ground.

" ... Really? I have to try it!

I immediately jumped up to him and grabbed the orb, and afterward, a flash followed again.

- OH-OH-OH!

Enchantix!

Magic dust!

Maximum power!

Enchantix!

The power within me!

Strong, brave!

Wonderful, magical, a mystery.

Enchantix!

Wonderful fairy!

The marvelous powers of winks!

Enchantix.

I immediately looked at my reflection in the blood.

My appearance had taken on a significant change. My not-so-long hair was now shoulder-length. But the most significant difference was: enlarged breasts, size 4!!! And a firm ass.

- Ufff, I'm a hottie!

On my left shoulder appeared a demon, a smaller me, but with horns, who immediately began to whisper to me:

" Hehehehehe, this is the perfect opportunity to enjoy a woman's body, you can even give yourself in," the demon suggested.

" Hmm, wait, angel, your thoughts?

On the first shoulder materialized my male, a smaller replica of me, but with a halo on her head.

" Don't listen to him, just play with your breasts and return to your original form," the angel advised.

"I think it would be better to listen to the angel. Uh, why don't you disappear?

" Where else do you expect me to see size 4 boobs up close like that! - the demon asked.

"I agree with the demon," said the angel.

" ... Alright then.

Just as I was about to touch my chest, I remembered that I wasn't here alone.

Atis was watching me in shock.

# Jamk # Jamk # Jamk # Jamk #

We stared at each other, honestly it was starting to get tense.

"Fuck it, I'd rather get my manhood back.

There was a flash, and I was a man again.

"It's good to feel firm, but it's better to be a man.

When I turned around, I saw that Atis was staring at the balloon with confusion.

- What's the matter, did you change sex or something? Outwardly, I don't think I've changed.

- Give me the orb.

- Here.

I tossed the ball exactly into his hands. Suddenly, it bounced off his hands and fell to the ground, cracking.

- ...

- ...

Ω In some space Ω

The God-like entity was minding its own business when it felt a sudden pain in the abdominal region.

* ¶ Rumbling ¶

- @$#$$#.

For the next three days, the entity had nuclear diarrhea.

Ω POV Raud Ω

One day after traumatizing his testicles.

I'm currently sitting at a bar drinking away my grief.

- Fuck!!! Fucking Kira Yoshikage! You son of a bitch!

- Get him out of here, or he'll get in a fight," the bartender said.

- Yeah," the big man replied.

- Fuck you, I'll leave," I told them and left the bar.

" Hmm, where am I supposed to go? Maybe... I'll go to the dungeon and bust my balls!

- Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha, I'm geni-, eek!

Ω End POV Ω