Chapter eight, Beautiful

'You are beautiful, I can't believe I get to call you mine and even though I don't deserve you, I will give you all my love'

One of my favourite melodies and I finally understand what the singer meant, in an exceptionally long time. I never thought this beautiful moment can be dreams that can never be fulfilled, a moment that I never thought will bring so much pain.

I am bleeding.

When will it be my time, when will I just come back from long school lectures and find you waiting for me to cuddle, while you playing with my hair?

Cheer me up while I am down and going out on dates, laugh all night long. Hold hands while we take a walk around campus, and work hard for our future as we study together. Play hide and seek like we are little kids and argue over the phone, who should end the call.

Make me feel at home when I am away from home.

Have video calls until we both pass out. Eat together on one plate while we feed each other. Not to mention having showers together with an excuse of saving water.

You are truly something special.

These moments playing in my mind, while I cannot forget that you were sleeping right next to me, watching you while you slept so peacefully so and being left with a question mark.

Did you really want to be here or you just doing this out of pity?

What do you think about me? I wish to know.

I have so many dreams, and for a moment I thought that I am desperate to be loved by you. It is such a pity that you do not believe in love.

The thought of being yours, scares me when I am having a tough time figuring out who I am.

Falling harder and harder as time passes time, when will it be the right moment as I am left without words, as I am left with dreams of how it would feel like to kiss you?

I have opened all doors for you to come in. I have let down my guard and lowered my walls for you.

I will not force you, if you would tell me what you want, I will fully oblige.