Chapter nine, Ignored

I sent you a text message and guess what it was left on read. A day passed and 2 days passed, and the 3 days passed. Still no response not even a hi not even an emoji or a sticker.

Just left there like a chewed gum.

I am feeling cold, alone and lost.

As I try and convince myself that maybe the last text I sent you, it is a text you can't reply to, but that couldn't stop you from sending something just to show that you care.

What are you afraid of? even Jesus woke up after 3 days.

The thought of selling myself cheap pains me, did I just play with my pride just for you to turn your back away from me just like that.

Tears streaming down my face as all the past experiences play in my mind, why has it been always like this.

All my past relationship experiences, I am the one that is always left and forgotten, no matter how hard I try and convince myself that I am good enough there will be that day that will come and knock you down to where you started.

Start questioning your skin tone, body structure and question of if I was short maybe he'd notice me. If maybe I had longer hair or bigger boobs...

As the list goes on and on but it doesn't change the fact that these physical qualities, I can never change I was born like this and how I look makes me who I am.

But it still hurts.

'I finally met you, but you got away. We got close but couldn't touch'

Is this what you truly want?

As I am fading away bit by bit to my dark corner.

I guess I was never good enough for you, but only sexual intensions made you linger around, thank God I was never going to open my legs to a boy that is childish like you.