Getting close to her

It's finally Monday and my turn to be with Ashley !

The moment Jules will return I'll go there.

I am literally counting seconds for my turn.

And yes, my wait finally ended.

Jules returned and I left for her place !

When I got there, she was looking marvelous and was smelling heavenly !

The Lavender and her own body fragrance mixed and a new intoxicating smell reached my nose and I couldn't help but sniff it off her like a dog !

" What the hell are you doing Derek ? "

Ashley said almost disgusted with my action.

" Oh sorry; but I am not sorry.

You smell fucking intoxicating !

And I can't help but enjoy and inhale it until it completely leaves your body ! "

I told her what was on my mind.

" Um...

Shall I call it as a compliment or what ? "

Ashley said feeling embarrassed.

" Did you liked it or did I offended you ?

If I did, forgive me and if I didn't; then yes you can take it as a very beautiful compliment.

And you can blush if, you want to, too !

So, what are you gonna do ? "

I said leaning on the wall.

" Um...

I think I will take it as a compliment.

And to make me blush, you gotta do better than that and that's for sure ! "

Ashley said leaning on the wall opposite me.

" Oh !

So, you are the hard one aren't you, lill one ? "

I said cocking my head.

" I guess, yes. "

Ashley said smirking.

" Ok, then.

Challenge accepted !

I would definitely make you blush with my words and that's for sure ! "

I said crossing my arms.

" Let's see, what you've got !

Leave this stupid stuff aside, Derek.

What about my Mom ?

You still didn't got anything about her ?

Not even a single thing ? "

Ashley asked out of the blue.

Uh-oh !

Here comes the most unwanted question.

What should I tell her ?

Shall I tell her what I think ?

Or shall I keep my mouth shut ?

" Please Derek tell me if, you know anything at all about her.

Anything.

Even if it is a bad news.

Please don't hide anything from me.

She is alive, isn't she ?

Or, is she...

Did something happened to her...

Or... "

Ashley said horrified at her own words.

Tears gathered in her eyes.

And she was shaking and looking at me with hope and expectations.

" Hey, love !

Don't cry.

Please don't.

Don't think that, something wrong would have happened with her.

It's true that, we don't have any confirm news about her; but trust me, I have a gut feeling that she is alright and safe.

Come with me.

Let's get you sited on the couch. "

I said grabbing her shoulders.

I took her to the couch and made her sit there and got her a glass of water to calm her down.

" Tell me, Derek.

What's wrong ?

What happened ?

What do you know ?

Just... "

Ashley said crying.

" Unless you stop crying, I am not gonna tell you anything at all !

Stop crying, please.

I can't see you crying.

Please don't cry, for me ?

Please ? "

I pleaded her to stop crying.

She stopped crying.

I reached out and wiped her tears with my thumbs and let my palm rest on her cheek.

Her skin is so soft just like a cotton ball.

She didn't pushed my hand away and I don't feel like talking my hand off her face either.

I cupped her face in my hands and made her look in my eyes.

" Listen to me love, I came here few days back.

The day when, Cole came to meet you in the hospital.

I came here to see if, I could get anything which will lead me to Rachel.

But when, I came here, it wasn't like how I left it !

It was just the same as we found it for the first time !

Just like it was when, we came here for the very first time with you.

And... Please don't think of me as some crazy guy but I... "

I hesitated.

" Tell me whatever it is !

Please don't pull it unnecessarily. "

Ashley said impatiently.

" Ok.

Do you know that, your Mom was suffering from OCD ? "

I asked.

" Yes, I know.

What about it ?

Is something wrong with... "

Ashley said impatiently jumping to conclusions.

" Calm down love, why are you thinking that something is wrong with her ? "

I said squeezing her hands.

" Because, you aren't telling me what happened and what are you trying to tell me ? "

Ashley said almost yelling at me.

" See, you know that only the owner of the place can keep minute of the thing at it's usual place, right ?

And when, we first came here, I had clicked few pictures of this place and we changed the places of few things; not on purpose ofcourse !

In the rush of getting something, we didn't put the things at their original places.

And when, I came here few days ago, all the things were at their original places !

That clearly means, someone came and kept those things at their places !

I talked to Cole, but he didn't came here.

And other than us, no one has the keys of this apartment.

You said this apartment has 3 keys !

One is with you, we have one then, where is the last key? "

I said raising an eyebrow.

" May be Mom have it or something like that... "

Ashley said guessing.

" That exactly is my point !

This is what I think...

I mean it's just a theory and I have no proof.

I may be right or may be I am completely wrong about it or may be..."

I said making myself clear about the theory.

" Just come to the point Derek, for god's sake ! Why are you explaining everything with possibilities ?

Why can't you tell something confidently to me ? "

Ashley said grabbing and shaking my shoulders.

" That's because, we haven't worked together before !

Everyone who have worked with me before knows that, I work on probability and nothing sure shot.

And because of that, they don't keep any kind of expectations or hopes from my theory !

But we are working together for the very first time and I don't want you to keep your expectations high and it turns out to be waste.

I don't want to hurt your feelings by giving you hope or something to believe and it comes out to be myth ! "

I said explaining myself.

Hope is a very dangerous thing.

It gives you the strength to keep going; and once it breaks, it robes you even of your life !

" I won't keep my expectations high.

I won't expect anything at all, just tell me something.

Anything ! "

Ashley said eagerly.

" Ok.

So, my theory is that, your Mom has the key to the place and she is suffering from OCD !

After we first came here and destroyed her place, she came here for something and couldn't leave her place dirty.

So, she cleaned it and kept all those things at their own places and left again ! "

I told her my theory.

" If we considered it to be true then, why did she came and left again ?

And why did she left at the first place ?

Why would she do that ? "

Ashley asked her doubts.

Uh-oh !

I guess it's time to unlock the mystery infront of her.

Would she take it well or will she break ?

Shall I ask Cole before I tell her anything ?

We have kept this for so long from her.

What if, she gets upset with all of us for keeping this from her ?

What if, she asks me to leave and never show my face to her ?

Let it be, she have the right to know everything about her Mom.

It doesn't matter if, she continues to be with us or not but she have the right to know everything.

" Listen Ash, I need to tell you something very important.

But before I tell you that, promise me you won't ask me to leave and you won't be mad at me ! "

I said trying to make myself safe for later.

" I am not gonna promise anything blindly.

Tell me what is it or leave right now and tell your huge hearted friends too, not to show their faces to me ever !

What are you hiding from me , Derek ? "

Ashley said clenching her teeth.

" If you are gonna play hard then, even I can't play easy !

Promise me Ash or I am gonna tell them, not to tell you anything either.

Then, you won't ever know what was it that, you could have known ! "

I said feeling guilty.

" You are so cruel, Derek ! "

Ashley said crying.

" I know and I am so sorry, baby.

I want that promise because, I don't want you to close your door on us and don't let us in !

And we can't afford to let you without any protection when, Michael is wandering outside to find you and kill you ! "

I said and cupped her face.

" Please try to understand Ash.

I swear that, this thing is something that, even if you knew it earlier, you couldn't have done anything in it.

So, please promise me, love ! "

I said caressing her cheeks.

" You better not be kidding about what you just said that, I couldn't have done anything in it ! "

Ashley said threatening me.

" I swear.

And if lie, you can break my jaw ! "

I said repeating Cole's words which made he laugh when she was hospitalized.

She looks so damm cute when, she is mad and tries to stop herself from laughing at my nonsense jokes, just like now !

I just want to pull her in my arms and kiss her till her perfect pink lips turns red !

Stop Derek, she isn't going to let you do that.

So, just stop or you won't be able to control yourself and she would definitely tell you not to come to her ever !

" Shut up, will you ?

I am trying to be serious here.

Ok, I promise. "

Ashley said faking her anger.

" Promise what ? "

I asked wanting her to be sure of what was she promising.

" I promise, I won't be mad, I won't ask you to leave nor would I ask the other guys to leave me alone.

Ok ?

Now tell me ! "

Ashley said eagerly to know what I wasn't telling her.

I told her about the suicide note we got in the apartment that day...

And boy she slaps so hard that, I could literally see the stars in the closed room and at day time !

She slapped me this hard to keep that thing from her; then, will she leave me alive after knowing all of the remaining story ?

I can't blame her nor can I ask her to calm down and stop slapping me; I myself asked her to break my jaw and she is doing exactly the same !

" Why did all of you kept this from me, for this long ?

Couldn't you have told me earlier ? "

Ashley said fuming.

" Um...

Because of this... "

I pointed my finger towards her hand which turned into a fist from flat palm and ready to land on my arm.

Oh dear, I didn't thought she would be this strong. If I knew it already, why would have I asked her to break my jaw ?

" Don't complain now.

You yourself asked me to to this to you !

Don't change the topic, tell me ?

Why did you all do this to me ? "

Ashley said determined to know the truth.

And fuck she started punching and slapping me so hard, it was hurting me actually !

I thought she would stop after some slaps and punches, but she wasn't looking like she was going to stop any time soon.

My cheeks were burning as hell and red marks were visible on my arms and from that, I imagined what would have happened to my cheeks !

This needs to be stopped, she is crossing her limits !

Yes, I like her...

But that doesn't mean anywhere in the world that, she could hit me this much !

She is screaming and yelling at me and hitting me all at once, like she is been possessed by some demon !

I was calling her name and trying to stop her but she wasn't ready stop.

She continued to hit me.

" Ashley !

Ashley, stop. !

What are you doing ?

Stop it, it's hurting now.

Ash, stop.

Ash ! "

I yelled.

I got mad and yelled her name loudly and grabbing her hands, I locked them behind her back.

I didn't do it on purpose, but when I locked her hands behind her back, she got pulled on my chest and her face came very close to mine.

I could feel her breath on my face.

She was trying to free her hands; but I am much stronger than her !

And her efforts to get out of my grasp didn't helped her getting away; but brought her even closer to me.

Her chest was practically pressing against mine. She was moving so fast that, her body was rubbing against my body.

Our breathing was becoming high because of the adrenaline rush we were having through our bodies; her's because of her anger and mine because of the beautiful lady rubbing herself against my body !

I could smell her intoxicating scent so close to my nose that, it took everything in me to stop myself from nudging my nose in her neck and enjoy her scent and dominate her !

Kiss her hard and take her breath away !

I couldn't even talk properly, I was practically panting and wispered to her.

" Stop, Ashley !

You can't fight with me.

There's no outcome of this fight.

Please, stop.

Don't make me hurt you, please, love.

Please, stop. "

I wispered softly in her ear.

Slowly she gave up fighting and I loosened my grip on her hands.

She rested her head on my chest.

I freed her hands and wrapped mine around her tightly and she hugged me back.

She was crying and sniffing and we started wispering to eachothers.

" Why, Derek ?

Why didn't you told me this earlier ? "

Ashley said feeling betrayed.

" Stop crying, love.

I didn't do it with bad intension.

Yes, we DID found her suicide note; but our sources couldn't find her body and that's why I refused to believe that she is dead !

And we didn't knew anything with certainty; then, what would we have told you ?

We were waiting for our sources to get some news with proof, anything.

But, they don't have any certain news about her and that's why I kept it from you.

I am so sorry, love.

I didn't wanted you to be in constant fear of her news, just like me !

I have been living with many worries since past few weeks, Ashley.

I know how it feels, to be in constant worry and I didn't wanted you to feel it.

Me suffering alone was more than enough !

I even didn't told many things to the guys for the same reason.

And guess what, all of your reaction is the same !

The difference is just that, they thought I was doing that to take the whole credit and you... "

I said trailing off.

I sighed hurtfully.

" I am very tired, Ashley.

I haven't slept in many days !

I have spent many nights awake, staring at the roof.

My brain haven't stopped thinking about many things.

Finding Rachel isn't the only thing I have to think about.

My brain is completely occupied with many other things.

Your safety, Rachel, Michael, Mr. Grayson and many others.

And none of these cases got me anything satisfying yet !

I am going crazy here, sweetheart !

I am really very tired.

I really didn't wanted to trouble you for anything, that's the only reason I kept this from you and nothing else, I swear.

And I... "

I couldn't say anything anymore.

At this point, even I got emotional.

I didn't cried though.

I haven't cried infront anyone yet but now ?

I am feeling like crying with her arms wrapped tightly around me.

" Shhhh.

I am so sorry.

I didn't know what you were going through.

I am sorry.

But what do I do ? I love her so much !

And she is the only family I have left !

And it got me crazy that, she left a suicide note and you didn't told me.

The thought that, I might have lost her, drove me crazy.

I know, I couldn't have done anything, even if you have told me this earlier.

I am so sorry... "

Ashley said tightening her grip on me.

" Don't apologise, love.

I know how it feels to think about our beloved in grave danger.

Have you noticed how happy and satisfied you have been in past few weeks ?

That wouldn't have been possible if, you knew about it !

And the reason I didn't told you is, we didn't had any proof about anything at all !

And listen to me, now I have some hope in positive side, the remaining key was with Rachel and only she knew exactly which thing was at which place !

That's why, I got all of her bank details and asked my sources to keep watch on even the minute transactions.

Don't you worry love.

I am sure, she is alive and safe.

Just we have to wait for any minute change in her bank status to know her exact location and we will get her ! "

I said caressing her head.

" I swear, I'll find her no matter wherever in the world she is !

So please, stop worrying love and focus on the sweet and happy moments you are getting.

And live your life to fullest now baby.

You haven't got the opportunity to do that.

Use this time to achieve what was missing.

Enjoy your time with us, sweetness !

I promise, I'll make it better as much as I can.

I don't know about others, but I'll definitely make you happy and keep you away from all the worries and all evil.

I know, they would do the same, but I am talking about myself.

Do you trust me ? "

I asked rubbing her back.

" Yes. I trust you.

And I am sure, you would do each and everything you just said.

I know you would keep me safe and away from all the evil.

I trust you, Derek.

I trust you. "

Ashley said softly.

She said and melted in my arms just like the butter melts when kept near the heat.

She let her head rest on my chest.

I could feel her breaths on my skin and for the first time in my life, it tickled me and it felt very good.

I've never let any girl rest her head on my chest. Actually, I've never let any girl touch me, once we were done for the night !

I never do kissing.

But her lips ?

They pull me towards them like, they are magnet and mine are made up of Iron !

The thoughts of pressing her to me so hard that, there won't be any space between us and kissing her so hard that, it would leave my marks on her and claim her as mine, just don't go away !

No matter how hard I push them away, they crawl again and again in my mind.

I enjoyed her being in my arms.

She is so soft against my hard body.

This actually feels so nice.

Usually, I press back of the girls to my chest, and grab their boobs in my hands.

Actually, I take them in my arms to feel them only in an erotic way.

I only like them in my hands and in my mouth !

And other than that, I don't even let them touch my arms !

But now that I have her in my arms and all I can think about is, how nice it feels to have her in my arms.

This is an alien feeling for me !

Feeling her in my arms made me feel complete, like the emptiness fulfilled completely.

I want to sleep having her in my arms and wake up, her being in my arms only !

This is very bad !

I haven't let any girl stay overnight in my bed, nor have I let them hug me or cuddle with me and now ?

Now I want to cuddle with her and don't let her go anywhere !

We stayed like that for a very long time and it felt like, I was in heaven.

After few hours, I prepared lunch for us and she loved it.

Though, she said she didn't liked it at all but, I know she loved it.

Because if she didn't liked it, she wouldn't have finished her plate and even grabbed some from my plate.

I told her about my work.

How I work ?

How I can't compete my work without my sources !

And about many complicated case I've solved and how everyone calls me the best Detective of the department.

And we didn't even realised when, the sun disappeared and moon came to greet us.

She insisted that, I should prepare the dinner too.

" You said, you didn't liked the lunch I prepared. Then, why do you want to have the same dirty and shit tasting food once again ? "

I teased her.

" I am giving you one more chance to improve your cooking skills.

Don't derive any different meaning from it.

Try to make it better than the lunch.

I swear, it tasted like shit ! "

Ashley said wrinkling her nose.

" Have you tasted it ?

How do you know how does shit tastes ? "

I said chuckling.

" I'll fucking kill you, Derek !

Just do what I say ! "

Ashley said faking her anger.

" What if, I deny to listen to you ?

And why should I even listen to what you say ? "

I said crossing my arms.

" I'll break your jaw ! "

Ashley said showing me her tiny fist.

She said teasing me and started laughing.

Her smile is a precious scene but her laugh ?

It's a treat for the ears.

It's so melodious.

" Wow !

The only thing left was, listening it from you ! Now that it's done, I can die peacefully.

Thank you so much. "

I said pretending to be hurt.

" Don't act over dramatic and prepare dinner. "

Ashley said rolling her eyes.

" Nope !

I am not gonna do that.

First, praise me for my excellent cooking skills and only then I'll cook anything ! "

I said pouting.

" And what made you think I would do that ? "

Ashley said raising her eyebrows.

" Your rumbling stomach !

You are hungry and you know, I can cook faster than any restaurant would deliver anything to you !

So, go ahead and praise me. "

I said with innocent face and eyes.

" You are so evil.

You are openly blackmailing me ! "

Ashley said scoffing.

" I never denied that ! "

I said smirking.

" Ok fine !

Please Derek, cook dinner for us. "

Ashley said pouting sweetly.

" Oh, thanks for the request.

But I haven't asked for that.

I asked you to praise my food and my cooking skills !

Come on. "

I said smiling.

" You cook so wonderful.

Your food is so delicious that, my mouth waters at it's smell.

Ok ?

Satisfied with this ?

Or do I need to lie more ? "

Ashley said raising her eyebrows.

" Actually, no I am not satisfied...

But I would adjust with it for now.

Only for you, my lady ! "

I said bowing.

" Oh, that would be a great favour to me !

Thanks Derek, you have such a huge heart.

Now go and prepare something fast. "

Ashley said dramatically.

" What would you like to have, ma'am ? "

I asked.

" Well, what can you cook ? "

Ash asked.

" Anything you name !

Terms and conditions apply !

The ingredients for the recipe must be available in the kitchen ! "

I said.

I searched for anything and prepared noodles with the available ingredients.

And I liked them and her look was more than enough to tell me that, she loved it.

We ate and went to bed.

I couldn't sleep.

I got used to stay awake whole night in past few days and so, I was unable to sleep.

I went to kitchen to drink water.

It was half past 2.

I went to kitchen and couldn't find the switch and in that rush I bumped onto something and some glass thing broke !

Wow, only this was lacking !

I hope I haven't woke her up.

I was still trying to find the switch.

Now more carefully because, I had a broken glass on the floor and it could hurt me real bad if I'd be careless.

I was trying to see in the darkness when, she switched on the lights !

" What are you doing Derek ?

What happened ?

Oh god, the glass broke !

It'll hurt you..."

Ashley said panicked seeing the broken glass.

She was about to approach towards me to clean the broken glass.

" Stop right there !

I am alright.

Don't come here, you'd get hurt.

I just needed the light.

I'll clean this up, you stay there or go back to sleep. "

I said.

" I am not a baby, Derek !

Let me help you... "

Ashley said seriously.

" Oh, you are a baby !

Don't I call you that ?

You are MY baby !

So stay there and let me clean it up. "

I said casually.

Her expressions changed.

Her face softened and she was kinda blushing.

" Are you blushing, baby ?

If you are, go ahead and blush, you look beautiful when you blush. "

I said genuinely.

She must deny that or how would she declare that she won ?

" What ?

Are you out of your mind ?

I am not blushing or anything.

I already told you that, you gotta do better than that to make me blush ! "

Ashley said stubbornly.

I cleaned the broken glass and threw it away.

I drank water and sat on the couch.

She came to me.

" What's wrong ?

Aren't you sleepy ?

I mean it's too late to be sitting on couch instead of laying on bed.

Come on go and get some sleep. "

Ashley said.

" No. I am not sleepy.

Actually it became my habit that, I can't sleep anymore.

You go and sleep, don't worry about me.

I am used to it but you aren't.

Go and take your beauty sleep.

I am fine here. "

I said.

" Nope. Not happening.

I have a perfect solution for your problem.

Go to your room and wait for me. "

Ashley said seriously.

" You have solution to my insomnia ?

Great !

If you made me sleep, I'll do whatever you ask me to ! "

I said excitedly.

" You bet !

Go and wait for me.

And beware of what you say, Derek ! "

Ash said and smirked.

She went in the kitchen and I went to the bedroom and was waiting for her when she came with a bowl in her hands.

" What's that ?

Are you planning to cut my hair ?

Don't you even dare... "

I said guessing wrong.

" Shut up and sit on the floor beside the bed. "

Ashley said.

I didn't saw any scissor in her hands and so, I relaxed a bit and sat on the floor.

She sat on the bed behind my back.

She ran her fingers through my hair and my natural reaction took over and I grabbed her hands.

I can't stand anyone touching my hair except me ! I've never let anyone touch them.

I love my hair more than anything.

My hair are my life.

I love them so much.

They touch my neck and cover my ears.

I groom them like no one grooms their.

I love my curly dark jet black hair and she is running her fingers through them, I don't like anyone touching them !

" What are you doing, love ?

Don't touch them !

I am sorry but, I don't like that ! "

I said seriously.

" Leave my hands Derek.

I told you I have a perfect solution for your problem.

So, let me do my work and put you to sleep. "

Ashley said softly.

" But I... "

I protested.

" Trust me Derek, I am not gonna damage them.

I love my hair too, I know how it feels to imagine they might be in some danger.

I swear, I won't damage them and if I do, just ask me to stop and I won't touch them; ever ! "

Ashley said.

I decided to trust her and freed her hands.

She again started running her fingers through my hair and slowly massaging the scalp.

Slowly she started applying a bit pressure in her fingers and it was feeling very good.

" How's it ?

Shall I stop ?

Is the pressure ok ?

Or shall I reduce or increase it ? "

Ashley asked if I wanted any changes.

" No. Nothing.

It's just perfect.

It feels very good, Ash. "

I accepted.

" Good.

Now just close your eyes and enjoy the massage.

I am gonna use some oil to massage your head now... "

Ashley said.

" Hey, wait !

What oil is it ? "

I shrieked in panic.

" It's coconut oil and I added some camphor tabs in it.

I've heated it a bit, it'll take away your thoughts and calm your racing mind.

Now, just relax and let this feeling engulf you.

And enjoy it.

If you want to talk to me you can but, I'll say don't talk and let the silence calm you. "

Ashley wispered.

I trusted her and shut my mouth and let myself drown in the heavenly feeling.

She started massaging my scalp nicely and the warm oil was feeling very good and she was also playing with my hair.

And for the first time ever, I was feeling that she should never stop playing with them.

She is the first one to touch as well as play with my hair because, I haven't let anyone touch them !

" Are you feeling sleepy ? "

Ashley asked a while later.

" A little bit. "

I said with my eyes closed.

" Good.

Now come here and lay down on the bed.

I'll scratch your scalp till you fall asleep.

Come. "

Ashley said softly.

I got up and went to lay down on the bed beside her.

As promised, she started scratching my scalp and as weird it was, it was feeling great and my eyes were feeling heavy and I closed them.

After sometime I woke up but my eyes weren't ready to open so, I didn't opened them.

But there was something heavy on my chest and I couldn't move easily.

I tried to turn to other side but, I couldn't.

I finally decided to open my eyes and see what's stopping me from moving...

And when I opened them, Ashley's head was on my chest and she was almost wrapped around my trunk.

She was deep asleep and was breathing evenly. Her breath was feeling so warm and soothing on my body.

Her chest was heaving as she breathed.

Her soft body was feeling awesome against mine.

Her curls covered her face.

I slowly and without waking her, pushed them behind her ear and she looks just marvelous while sleeping !

I wish I could just look at her sleeping face and wake up every morning with her in my arms.

She moved and came even more closer to me than she was.

Her lips parted a bit and I almost kissed her...

But I know, if I had kissed her, she wouldn't have seen my face ever !

I desperately wanna taste her juicy and soft lips but, with her consent and when she knows I am kissing her !

I don't want my first kiss with her to be a stolen one.

I can definitely wait for her to allow me to kiss her !

And while I was busy admiring her beauty, I didn't realised that it's 8 am.

Fuck !

Is this for real ?

I slept the whole night ?

I didn't woke up even for once ?

She did put me to sleep as she promised !

I feel very fresh and alive after a long time as I got some sleep.

Now that, I am going to be with her I'll ask her to help me sleep.

I didn't realised that, I slept this long !

I could sleep only for an hour or so in my room, alone.

She really do have a perfect solution for my insomnia !

I bet she is about to wake up.

She is squirming so much and the worst thing is, she is moving closer to me !

That's not the worst thing; that is the best feeling !

But, her rubbing against me is awaking my deep burried feeling for a female body is !

And not only that, but her actions are awaking something else too !

My already present morning wood, me staring at her and her rubbing against me is getting it more harder and I am sure, she won't be very happy to see whom she have awoke along with her !

I must get out of the bed without waking her up.

But how ?

She is literally clinging to me...

Oh boy, this feels awesome to have her clinging to me, like she doesn't want to let me go.

I've never felt anything like this before; I haven't let anyone stay in my bed, I haven't let anyone kiss me once we are done, I haven't let anyone hug me, I haven't cuddled with anyone !

And now ?

I have done most of the things I've never let anyone do to me before.

And it doesn't feel weird with her.

It feels right, like nothing can be right than this !