39. Chapter 39

Family reunion! Please leave a review (honestly I read every one and they are a great reminder for me to get things up in a timely manner lol)

"Where's Will?" Jay turned to Erin after Dr. Charles exited the hospital room, "Didn't he say he was going to get Kate?"

"Maybe he took her to get something to eat?" Erin pulled her cell phone out of her coat pocket, "She must be starving. I think Kev and Ruzek convinced her to eat one piece of French toast but that's literally all she's managed. Oh, and Will got her to eat ice cream. Last night. Or early this morning? I don't remember," Erin started a text to Will.

"Why hasn't she been eating?" Jay asked, realizing the answer to his question as soon as it left his lips, "Oh."

Erin grimaced slightly and glanced up from her cell phone, "She hasn't been hungry. Will's worried that she's going to get sick, but I think once she sees that you're okay, she'll be fine," She smiled and rubbed Jay's arm, "It's okay, babe."

"It's not, though," Jay replied, "I yelled at her. She's probably scared of me now. And I just can't believe I put the two of you through this." He buried his head in his hands, "I'm so sorry, Erin."

"Babe," Erin rubbed his shoulders, "What did Doctor Charles just come in here and say? It's not your fault. You went through a lot of shit over there, and not talking about it hasn't been working out for you. She's smart, if you tell her what's going on, I'm sure she'll understand."

"Alright," Jay managed weakly, glancing toward the door. Will waved and pointed downward, indicating that Kate was by his side. Erin gestured for him to enter.

The little girl looked incredibly nervous as she stood beside her uncle, clutching Will's hand tightly as she regarded her parents. They both looked absolutely exhausted, but Erin looked relieved. "Hi, Squirt," Jay choked out, offering a smile. His daughter's eyes were still red from all the tears from the past few days and there were dark circles around her eyes standing out starkly on her pale face. She looked bone-tired and fragile as she looked up at her parents anxiously.

"It's okay, Monkey," Will said, slowly entering the room, "Your dad is going to be just fine."

"Hi Daddy," Kate whispered after a moment of sizing up her father, taking a tentative step into the room with Will, "You-you feelin' better?"

"I am, now that you're here," Jay smiled wider, "I am so sorry for everything, kiddo. I really am."

"You gonna stay?" Kate asked, glancing over to Erin and then back to Jay, "You not leavin' no more?"

"I'm never leaving you again," he promised, "And I'm sorry I raised my voice the other day. I-I wasn't myself. But I'm okay now."

Kate's rigid posture relaxed and she released Will's hand, closing the gap between herself and her father. "I missed you Daddy," she murmured, allowing him to tenderly lift the child into his lap, "I missed you so much."

"I missed you more," Jay replied, holding back tears, "I'm so sorry." He buried his face in her soft hair, feeling some semblance of peace now that he had his little girl back in his arms, "I'm so sorry."

"You had a bad nightmare," Kate pulled back from his embrace and gently stroked her father's arm, "I get those, too."

Erin ran a hand over the back of Kate's head, "You and Daddy are very similar."

"Where did you go?" Kate asked quietly, "Mommy and Uncle Will and Grandpa Hank couldn't find you. They thought you might be dead and I was so worried 'bout you."

Jay looked at Erin, as if asking permission to tell his daughter the whole truth. She nodded slightly and placed a comforting hand on his back. He took a deep breath, "So, you know that I get nightmares sometimes, just like you. And the other night, I had a really bad one. And I hadn't had one in a while. And to be honest with you, kiddo, I don't remember a lot of what happened. I know that I accidentally hit Mommy in the shoulder, and that I yelled at both of you. And my friend Mouse, who I was in Afghanistan with, lives out in Ohio. And I remember waking up on his couch, but I don't remember getting there."

Kate listened intently as her father recalled what happened to him. "So today, Mouse drove me back here, because I was worried that there might be something going on in my brain. And I have something called Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, which can happen to people after they've been in the military."

"You sick?" Kate widened her eyes in fear and then looked over at Will and to Erin, "Is Daddy gonna die?"

"No, no, sweetheart," Erin reassured her, "Daddy's gonna be just fine."

"How come he's in the hospital?" Kate asked worriedly, gripping Jay's arm tightly, "I-I don't want you to be sick."

"So the thing with PTSD is that I'm not sick physically, in my body. It's more that I have flashbacks and sometimes when I wake up, I don't know what's going on," Jay tried to explain, "And that's why I'm in the hospital, to talk to our friend Doctor Charles, who's going to help me sort through what's going on in my head."

Kate nodded slowly, "Like how come I talk to Dr. Handel? 'cause I get scared a lot?"

"Actually, a lot like that," Jay confirmed, "Some of thing things I saw and did in Afghanistan make me really scared of stuff here. So I'm going to talk to Dr. Charles regularly and get better."

"You comin' home though, right?" Kate asked hopefully, "Mommy don't sleep when you not there. And I don't e-der."

Jay smiled softly, "Yes, I'm coming home. And I'm not leaving."

"Good." Kate sighed and leaned into her father's embrace, "Me and Mommy missed you lots."

Erin pressed a kiss on Jay's shoulder and stroked Kate's hair, "What do you say we all head home? Maybe pick up some Chinese food on the way?"

Kate nodded against Jay's chest, "I am hungry now. I-I was too worried to eat, but now I feel better, cause Daddy's back."

Jay smiled sadly and looked up at his brother, "Thanks for everything man. I really appreciate it."

"Don't mention it," Will said, "I'm always here for your girls, brother."

Erin smiled tiredly, leaning against Jay's shoulder, "Really, Will. I don't know what I would have done without you. And the whole thing with DCFS and taking care of Kate-"

"You can call me at any time, Erin," Will replied, "I wasn't there for my family when they needed me and I'm trying to change that. So anything you need, you, Kate, Jay, Hank…I'll be there."

"I'm going to step into the shower, babe," Jay decided, setting an extremely sleepy Kate down carefully on the couch, "I'll just be a minute."

"Sounds good," Erin exhaled and sank heavily on the couch next to her little girl. Kate tiredly cuddled against her while Erin threaded her fingers through her baby's soft locks, so thankful to be home with her entire family.

Hank had been extraordinarily relieved to hear that Jay was alright and demanded that he take a few days off to get himself straight. He had insisted Erin take the day as well, in order to get the good night sleep she desperately needed. "We're going to eat in a few minutes, sweetheart," Erin murmured to Kate, scratching her scalp lightly to rise the little girl out of her almost-sleeping state, "Then we can go to sleep, okay? I know you're exhausted."

"I didn't sleep last night much," Kate whispered groggily, clambering into Erin's lap and sagging against her chest, "I was too scared that Daddy was gone forever."

"I know, I was too, baby." Erin pressed a kiss atop Kate's head, "But Daddy's back now, and we're going to be alright."

"And they puttin' Mr. P in jail too, right?" Kate asked, "So I don't gotta be worried 'bout anything?"

"That's right," Erin nodded, having completely forgotten that the psychopath who had brutalized and traumatized her little girl was finally in custody and awaiting sentencing before trial, "He's in jail and he's not getting out."

"I'm glad he didn't get Daddy," Kate mumbled, "That's what I was most worried 'bout. That he would get out of jail and hurt Daddy like he hurt you."

"Well, that's not going to happen," Erin promised, standing up with Kate in her arms, "What do you say you and I set the table so that we can eat as soon as Daddy gets out of the shower, hm?"

"'m glad you're back, Daddy," Kate breathed as she rested against her father's chest. Following a quick dinner, the reunited family had convened on the sofa to watch an episode of Animal Planet and head to bed early. Erin was spent and dangerously close to falling asleep on Jay's shoulder but was willing herself to keep her eyes open. Kate was exhausted as well, though she was far more captivated by the meercats than her mother.

"I'm glad too, Squirt," Jay kissed the top of his baby's head and smoothed Erin's hair back. She stirred gently against his shoulder and glanced over at the clock on the cable box.

"I think it's time for bed, baby," Erin mumbled, slowly peeling herself off Jay's shoulder, "I'm sleepy, and you must be too."

Kate shook her head and tried to stifle a yawn. "I don't wanna sleep," she whispered, glancing nervously up at her parents, "I don't want anything to happen."

Erin and Jay exchanged looks, "Sweetheart, nothing bad is going to happen, I promise," Jay said seriously, "You will be perfectly safe, alright?" The little girl didn't respond, so Jay stood with her in his tired arms.

"B-but I-I don't wanna sleep in my bed," Kate whimpered as Jay carried the exhausted little girl from the couch toward her bedroom, "I wanna be with you and Mommy."

He paused in the doorway to Kate's bedroom and glanced over his shoulder at Erin. She nodded in agreement as she replaced the throw pillows on the couch, "We could use a sleepover tonight," she decided, turning toward the master bedroom, "Come on, I'm beat."

Jay chuckled and carried Kate back across the living room toward his bed, the little girl having relaxed considerably against him. "I just wanna be with you and Mommy," Kate mumbled as he set her down carefully on the mattress, "I sleep best with you guys."

He smiled as Erin settled in next to her little girl. "I'll be back in a few minutes, okay? You guys get some sleep."

Erin looked up at him, surprised, "You're not coming to bed?"

"In a bit," Jay said, gently kissing her forehead and then Kate's, "I'm just going to make a call."

She raised her eyebrows suspiciously, but was too tired to physically drag her partner into the bed, "Hurry, okay?"

"I will," Jay smiled, switching off the bedside lamp and padding softly to the living room.

Erin startled awake after escaping the grips of a horrible dream-Jay was missing and she couldn't find him anywhere, and Kate had been taken by DCFS. She breathed a heavy sigh of relief when she realized that there was a small body pressed against her chest, snuggled in closely with the comforter almost covering her head. Erin smiled gratefully, knowing all too well that DCFS could have taken her baby girl away for no other reason that that she wasn't biologically related to her. She reached an arm out, expecting to find the warm body of her partner, but was instead met with cold sheets.

That snapped Erin out of her sleepy state. She blinked her eyes and checked again, but Jay was not in bed. The clock on his bedside table indicated that it was just after one in the morning, and she and Kate had been sleeping for some time. As carefully as she could, Erin extracted herself from the confines of the cozy bed and hurried across the living room toward her daughter's bedroom, hoping that Jay had crashed in her bed. When she saw that Kate's bed was empty, Erin's stomach dropped. She turned for the kitchen and stopped short when she saw her partner, fast asleep on the living room couch.

Erin exhaled the breath she had been holding and willed her heart to stop racing. Jay was safe in their home and sleeping soundly. She crept quietly over to their sofa and perched on the edge. Awoken by the dip in the cushions, Jay blearily cracked open one eye and looked up at his partner. "Hi babe. What are you doing up?" he mumbled, lazily swiping a hand over his face.

"A better question is why are you sleeping on the couch?" Erin retorted gently, lightly running her fingertips over his arms, "You didn't come to bed?"

"I-I must have fallen asleep after I talked to Mouse," Jay attempted. Erin frowned, clearly seeing right through his lie.

"You don't need to lie to me, Jay," Erin whispered, pausing her touch on his chest, "I know you."

Jay sighed and swallowed, "I uh, didn't want to hurt you. Or Kate."

"Babe," Erin breathed, laying down in the small space between the couch cushion and her partner, placing her head on his shoulder, "You don't need to worry about that, okay? Dr. Charles said that it probably wouldn't happen again, and the best course of action was to resume your daily routine."

"I know," Jay replied slowly, threading his fingers through Erin's hair, "I just couldn't bear the thought of hurting you again." He kissed the crown of her head, "How's the shoulder?"

"I'm fine, I promise," Erin insisted, reaching up a hand to cup his cheek, "I would be a whole lot better if we were sleeping in the same bed."

"Mm, a few more minutes," Jay replied, "I'm comfortable."

Erin chuckled and nestled in closer, inhaling the scent of Jay's aftershave as she pressed her face against his neck.

Kate rolled over, expecting to feel her mother's tired arms around her shoulders but instead hit a large overstuffed pillow. She sat up immediately and glanced around her parent's bedroom, neither Erin nor Jay in sight. As quickly as she could, Kate shed the comforter and hurried to the living room, hoping that at least one of her parents were still in the apartment. She assumed the worst, that Erin and Jay had left after deciding that she was too big a burden to bear.

When she saw that Erin was cuddled up against Jay, both detectives fast asleep on the couch, Kate had never been more relieved. She padded over to the couch and lay a gentle hand on her father's chest. "Hey Squirt," Jay mumbled, tilting his head slightly, "Did you have a bad dream?"

Kate shook her head, "How come you and Mommy are sleepin' out here?"

Jay widened his eyes, realizing that he and Erin were indeed still lying on the couch. "Oh. I guess we fell asleep out here," he paused, taking in his little girl's expression, "Oh, kiddo, I'm sorry. You must have been worried when you woke up and neither of us were in bed."

She nodded tiredly. "I come snuggle with you and Mommy?"

"That sounds like a plan. I'll bring you and Mommy to bed a little later, hm?" He extended an arm, allowing Kate to clamber onto his chest. She delicately laid her head down beneath his chin, the rhythmic beating of his heart soothing her into a deep slumber.

"Mm," Erin mumbled, shivering slightly with her eyes still closed. She was cuddled up to a very warm body, but her toes were absolutely frozen. She opened her eyes and immediately smiled, coming face-to-face with her angelic sleeping baby.

"Morning, babe," Jay whispered into her hair, one arm wrapped around her body keeping her close, the other across Kate's sleeping form and resting on Erin's hip, "Did you sleep well?"

"The best," Erin replied, "What time did Kate join us?"

"Not entirely sure," Jay said, "You fell asleep and I was gonna take us to bed but then I fell asleep. And Kate woke me up since she woke up worried that we'd left, and then I fell asleep again."

"I guess out of all the places to crash, this isn't the worst. Though our bed does have the benefit of covers. And a little more space." She wrinkled her nose, "And my feet are freezing."

Jay chuckled and titled his head down to lightly kiss her nose, "Well, we slept in a bit, so maybe we could head to that diner you like for some breakfast? And before you say anything, yes, I'll make the coffee before we leave."

"My hero," Erin smiled, extracting one arm from its place almost underneath her partner to stroke her little girl's back, "Good morning, Kate."

The child's eyes fluttered open slowly. "Hi," she mumbled, rubbing her eyes tiredly, "We sleeped on the couch."

"Mm-hm. How about we get dressed and head out to the diner for some breakfast?" Jay suggested, "I think I could go for a big omelet, what do you say?"

"Woo-zek had omelet yesterday," Kate informed him, "And he had pancakes and he ax-iden-ly poured the syrup on the eggs."

"That's disgusting," Erin declared, propping herself up on the couch, "But I'm starving. And I could definitely eat another round of French toast."

"Me too!" Kate smiled widely, "Do you think I can get blueberries, strawberries and bananas?"

"Maybe," Jay sat up and placed her on the ground, "Can you go pick out some clothes while I start the coffee?"

"Cause Mommy likes your coffee better than diner coffee," Kate nodded in understanding, "Big socks Mommy?"

"And a sweater," Erin confirmed, "It's really chilly out there today. And windy."

"Better than diner coffee?" Jay winked at Erin as he started the machine, "I don't know, that's a pretty low bar babe."

"You know you make the best coffee," Erin wrapped her arms around Jay's waist, "I don't know, I think I missed that most of all."

Phew. Raise your hand if you're glad the family is back together again! Gotta get that good karma because nothing stays peaceful for long in Chicago :)