391. F.F. Mega Pizza Place! ~Let's Go!!!~

"Yep... That's Co-Dependency. And, yes, Josuke. You have Masochistic Personality Disorder," said Ghost Jedan. "Finn, you have Borderline Personality Disorder. Jake and Spongebob, you both have ADHD. Patrick, you have an eating disorder. And Gumball, you're a narcissist."

"What about Darwin!?" asked Gumball.

"He's the only normal one here," said Ghost Jedan. "But the real player here is Josuke's dominating MPD. He's practically feeding you his baggage like punching bags... of course, at the expense of your mental health."

"So, what do you suggest?" asked Josuke.

"You spend time... bonding! I want you people to communicate properly while bonding. The six of you should try to practice a little bit of self-unconditional love while Josuke, you practice in self-sacrifice."

"But I'm a masochist! How am I the dominant one!?" asked Josuke.

"You have what our boss, Rick, calls Jerry Syndrome," said Ghost Jedan. "Basically you unconsciously act so pitifully and pathetic like prey itself to the point where you entrap your actual prey when they come close to you. You're like a fucked up venus flytrap or a siren bitch. No offense...Meanwhile, you also abuse Josuke by, well, constantly bullying him his whole life."

They all bow their heads.

"Just stay clear from danger, alright?" smiled Ghost Jedan.

Later...

"So... we've been awkward for a while, now... Because apparently I hatched a random egg in a cave in the forest and our relationship got called out by a lizard dude... So... I guess we have to be healthy, now..." said Josuke. 

Everyone else bows their head in shame.

"Guys..." said Josuke. "Oh! I have an idea!"

Everyone turns to Josuke. 

"Let's bond in that place!" Josuke points to a random restaurant.

"That place opened five years ago... What the hell?" asked Gumball. "It looks so cool!"

"Freddy... Fazbear's... Mega Pizzaplex...?" asked Darwin. "Don't kids die here every year? I heard that nine kids died here... And apparently a security guard and a kid received extensive protection from Gabrielle recently. They said the place is haunted..."

"Ooooh!" yelled Gumball. "The scary mega mall pizza place in Washington, Utah is gonna kill you in your sleep with coupons!"

"Better than taxes," said Finn.

"Psh! Yeah!" yelled Josuke. 

"But... the place actually closed down a month ago after the animatronics were destroyed... I doubt that there'd be any food in there..." said Spongebob.

"So..." said Finn. "Now, what?"

"Wanna break-in?"

"*GASP!!!*" yelled Spongebob. "BUT THAT WOULD BE-!!!" He whispers. "Illegaaaal..."

Patrick riverdances psychotically. "HIHIHIHIHIHIHI!!! YES!!! PIIIIIIIIIIZZAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!"

"I heard all they do is microwave the pizzas, right?" smiled Josuke. "And it'd be ready?"

"Yeah... It's called the 21st century, Josuke," said Gumball.

"Oh, geez..." said Josuke.

"Oh... I mean-!!! I'm sorry!" yelled Gumball. "Wait... Shit..."

"Yeah... crap... we're doing it again," said Josuke.

"Try standing up to me... Can-... Can you do that?"

"Ahem! Uh... Your mom."

"What!?"

"Joe... Mama?"

"What is it with you and 'Your Mom' jokes!?" asked Finn.

"I-... I don't know!" yelled Josuke. "What is it with y'all and... your moms...? Huh...?"

Everyone stares at Josuke feeling sorry for him.

"You're a virgin," said Gumball.

"I actually am."

"Jesus Christ! Would you please stand up for yourself just like you did with Erina or some shit!? Our relationship is practically toxic!" yelled Darwin.

"Try thinking that you love yourself as you love us!"

"Uh..." said Josuke. "Your sister...?"

Everyone facepalms.

"Big fucking genius Josuke Higashikata here... Jesus Christ, man. You're the quiet kid for a reason, man," said Gumball. 

"Excuse you! I'm not the quiet kid!"

"Dude, you have your own made-up language."

"Latin isn't a made-up language!"

"You're the quiet kid because when you use that language, tables and chairs begin fucking floating around the area."

"Shut up! Stop calling me the FUCKING QUIET KID!!!"

"What are you gonna do!? Shoot me!?"

Josuke takes out a gun and points it at Gumball.

"WHOA!!!" yelled Finn.

"YEAH, I WILL!!!" yelled Josuke.

Gumball hesitates. "J-Josuke...!"

"I AM NOT THE QUIET KID!!!"

Gumball puts his hand behind his head. "Okay... Just put down the-..."

*CLICK CLICK!!!*

Gumball takes out a gun and points it at Josuke. "Go on, punk... Make my day..."

"Hiyo, Silver," said Josuke.

"Where the fuck did that even come from!?" asked Darwin.

Finn takes out a gun and points it at Gumball. "Gumball, I will shoot you!"

"Finn!" Jake takes out a gun and points it to Finn. "Don't get yourself into whatever this is!"

"Forget it, Jake," said Finn. "It's Freddy's."

"Yippikayay, monkey muppets," said Patrick, pointing a gun at Finn. "Everyone put their guns down..."

Jake points his gun to Darwin.

Patrick points his gun to Jake.

"EVERYBODY STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!!!" yelled Spongebob. Spongebob is holding a C4. "I WILL BLOW US ALL TO SMITHEREENS IF WE DON'T COOPERATE!!!HOW ABOUT ANOTHER JOKE, EVERYONE!???"

"What the fuck is even happening?" asked Darwin. "WHERE'D THOSE GUNS COME FROM!!?"

Darwin sees a gun on the ground. Darwin sees that there are literal guns in the entire street just lying around. "This place has very unsafe litterbugs."

"Okay!" said Gumball. "I'll just put this down! Everyone put their guns down!"

Everyone nods and puts 'em down slowly.

"Well, that was needlessly intense," said Darwin.

The group enters the mall silently.

"Wait... isn't this illegal?" asked Josuke.

"I JUST SAID THAT!!!" yelled Spongebob.

*STEP STEP STEP STEP STEP!!!*

The stepping stops.

They feel a chill in their bones and they feel as if someone just came back... from somewhere...?

"Eh!" shrugged the six, as they entered. 

Spongebob, however, shivered out of fear and hugged Patrick.

"Get off of me, cheese-boy..." said Patrick. 

"What the barnacle is wrong with you, Patrick!?" asked Spongebob.

"Sorry... I have cramps..." said Patrick.

"No, you don't!"

"Starfish have two sexes, Spongebob! It's only natural that I do!"

There, they entered the main stage, which is dark and silent. So, everyone takes out their phones and turns on their flashlights.

"Are the lights still working around here?" asked Josuke.

"Found one!" smiled Josuke.

*VRUN!!!*

The lights turn on, revealing an empty stage.

"THERE!!!" smiled Finn, pointing at the food court.

Everyone rushes to it and sees several abandoned restaurants.

"They say that the pizza never goes bad," said Josuke. "It's like super frozen or some shit."

They run to the main aisle, seeing several pizza boxes compressed so much that it's about the size of a single die.

They place five in the microwave stacked on each other. Two Four Cheeses, One Meat, and Two Pepperonis.

"Okay... A-Okay..." said Josuke. "That's a Lots'a Pizza."

Everyone takes a piece each for their first round.

"Oh... Josuke..." said a female voice in his head. "When will you learn...?"

Josuke grabs his head and shakes it.

"What do you mean Moana sucks!?" asked Darwin. "Why the honest fuck would your opinion matter on the internet!?"

"MLKJ's opinion mattered!" yelled Gumball.

Their voices get muffled.

"Gumball, his opinion saved an entire race."

"Yeah! And I'm saving Polynesians from such insult! It's a racist film!"

"How!?"

"Because they speak English."

"'Cuz it's a cartoon!? What is wrong with you!? You sound like a Twitterer!"

"Don't mention that name to my face ever again," said Gumball, he said with a scary face. 

"What's the purpose of critics anyway!?"

"If you were to buy a ticket, would you buy a ticket to the good movie or the bad movie!?"

"Bad movie, because clearly, the other side is missing out!"

"Ugh! JoJo. What do you think?"

Josuke is zoning out again.

Josuke's eyes widen.

"Josuke...?"

Gumball's eyes widen.

"I think we should snap him out of it," said Darwin in a muffled voice.

*SMACK!!!*

Gumball punched Josuke in the face.

"Dude! Why, though!?" asked Darwin.

"Gumball!" yelled Finn.

"Sorry! I thought you meant-!!!"

Patrick laughs at Josuke.

"Patrick, no!" yelled Spongebob.

Jake is snoring in the distance. "Huh? What?"

"Get down," said Josuke, with the voice no longer muffled.

"What!?" asked everyone.

"GET DOWN!!!"

Everyone gets down under the table as the lights go out.

*k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k*

"You... Maharlican officials... thought that you have completely destroyed my legacy... But don't you people see...?I always come back!!!"

The table is lifted up and no one is there.

It's revealed that there is an ugly skeleton-like creature with a dark green and rotting bunny costume underneath. Its eyes are violet. The smell of rotten corpses and rust could be smelled from the creature. His body has robotic enhancements.

Turns out, they're above the creature, inside the vents.

"Where are you...? My facial scanners indicate that you people are connected with the people who destroyed my plans... Miguel Josuke Higashikata, Finn Mertens, Jake the Dog, Spongebob Squarepants, Patrick C. Star, Darwin Watterson, and Garfield."

"What...!? Do I look like I eat lasagna!? Well, I do... It's just that I'm not that particular cat you're-..." whispered Gumball, as the entire group covered his mouth.

"THERE YOU ARE!!!"

The creature grabs a generator and throws it at them, to which they crawl away into the vents.

Josuke and Gumball use the power of luck.

"Stand-Users!" yelled the creature. "I could sense your soul energies... protruding in your filthy bodies!!!"

"Stand-Destabilizating EMP activated," said the creature in a robotic voice.

Suddenly, all their Stands are deactivated.

"I can't bring out my Stand!" whispered Gumball.

Josuke punches the vent with his woged fists and the seven of them crawl out and drop into the Daycare Area.

"Heheheheheheheh... C'mere, little boys..." A flexible animatronic with a moon face in blue pajamas crawl out and grunt as it crawls around with its back toward the floor as its strange head is twisted around. "Let's go somewhere... hehe... Private..." he spoke in a creepy and goblin-like voice.

Josuke woges and kicks the creature far away, as it laughs and wobbles its arms around.

Josuke grabs its head and crushes it with his woged hand.

*tik tik tik tik tik tik tik!*

"Eh... Ah, well... I'll recruit you, instead..."

"We won't work for you, you psycho!" yelled Josuke.

He breathes strangely and suggestively. He chuckles softly like he's high. "I'll warp your minds and break all of you to pieces, you strange unorthodox team of nitwits."

Josuke takes out his phone and scans William Afton while they all hide under a table. "Apparently this guy is a serial killer... William Afton... The first victim is Charlotte Emily..."

"The Author!? She's alive..."

Josuke speedreads the files. "What... the fuck...!? Apparently, she's some kind of artificial android girl...!? The true Charlotte is apparently dead...This guy killed her."

"Wait... Isn't Afton the guy who owned Afton Robotics LLC? Wasn't he this huge deal back in the '70s or '80s or whatever!?" asked Gumball. "Other than the child murders his sister company apparently had..."

Everyone is struck with a realization. "OOooh...."

Afton lifts the table up and meets the group.

They all shriek like girls.

Jake enlarges his fist and punches Afton, but he is only knocked a few inches back.

Afton hammers his fists down. The seven of them tumble away backward.

Finn takes the table's leg and smashes Afton's head with it. He simply chuckles. "That's adorable... A bear hat? Do you know what would be fun? If I turn you into another animatronic... Polar Freddy, perhaps?"

Finn kicks him away as he rolls backward. "Is this guy the Purple Guy Killer!?"

"I'm still going to kill that thing," said Gumball.

Gumball takes a bottlecap and flicks it toward the creature's leg.

*CLANG!!!*

"GAH!!!" yelled Afton, as he is now unable to move his left leg. Afton lifts Gumball up with one arm. "You... impudent little Neko twerp! I'll turn you into another Candy the Cat... And I'll scavenge you for parts!"

The seven look at each other, smile, and nod to each other.

Finn kicks an opening in his arm.

*CLANG!!!

*CRACK!!!*

*SPLAT!!!*

He lets go of Gumball while his arm gets stuck in a horrifying position.

"That looks anti-semitic..." said Darwin. Darwin kicks him in the other leg.

Finn kicks him in the belly.

Spongebob and Patrick throw stuff into his ass.

Jake enters his body through openings by turning his fingers into roots and begins destroying the spring locks in his body.

Josuke finally punches Afton's face as he roars.

*CRACK!!! SPLAT!!! CRACK!!! SPLATTER!!!*

Afton wheezes breathing in and vomits oil. "You... fucking... nitwits..."

Josuke smiles. "I heard of this rumor but I wasn't sure if this was true..."

Josuke takes out some coffee from the vending machine and splashes it all over Afton's face.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!"

*CRACK!!! CRACK!!! CLANG CLANG CLANG!!! SPLAT!!!*

Afton falls to the ground. The lights of his eyes go out.

"Huh..." smiled Josuke. "I feel... kinda better, right now... Feels like that this is the first time we all worked together like that in a while..."

"Consider this our bonding experience!" Gumball crossed his arms and smirked.

Everyone takes out their guns and throws them away to the floor.

*BANG!!!*

*SPLAT!!!*

They all go off and shoot themselves in the legs.

"FUCK!!!" yelled the seven.

They fall to the ground and cry.

"Holy shit!" yelled Darwin. "Holy shit! Holy shit!"

"MOOOOOMMAAAAAA!!!" sobbed Gumball.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-!!!" yelled Patrick.

"OH, FLIPPIN' FLAPSEN BARNACLE-HEADED TARTAR SAUCE NEMATODES-!!!" yelled Spongebob.

Jake drinks another coffee. "I'm fine, by the way," said Jake.

Finn grunts like a man and pulls the bullet out of his leg. "I'll carry you, guys..."

"No... I'll do that... Y'all need to get those tetanus shots," said Jake.

"FUCK!!! OH!!!" yelled Josuke. "FUCK!!! OH, SHIT!!! BOTH MY LEGS GOT SHOT!!! FUCKIN' SHIT!!!"

"Let's go, guys," said Jake.

Jake grabs the others and turns his legs into stilts and walks away.

Meanwhile, Afton's eyes begin glowing up.