Band-aids don't fix bullet holes. I'm actually relating myself to a Taylor Swift song now. Tay would be so proud. My friend, Tay, not Taylor Swift...
I shake my head and will myself to speak to Adam who is now staring at me very intently, waiting for me to start speaking.
"I've been hurt before. A lot. But you already know that. My mom died when I was a kid. I loved her so much... And losing her made it feel like it was the end of the world. I tried my best not to think of her, not talk about her so it would ease the pain, but it didn't. I was only putting off the inevitable. I promised myself that I wouldn't care for someone the same way again, because I was afraid of getting hurt. I was afraid of heart break, of letting go so much that I lost myself."
I took a deep breath to steady myself and Adam took my hand, caressing it gently, making me relax.
"My dad married Josephine two years after my mother's death to take care of us, since he was away at business trips. He tried his best to give us his time but to him it wasn't enough. Even though it meant everything to us. My brothers were sent to boarding school in England I was 14. She took that as an opportunity to torture me, beat me up because I didn't follow some rule or because I hurt Olivia's feelings. Tristan was her son but he was so good to me. He used to take my side every time."
I chuckle a bit nervously and feel the tears prick at the corners of my eyes.
"When they came back I was bruised and hurt. Weak. Starved. My brothers refused to leave without me so they stayed here with me.."
"Then when I was 19, I met Michael, in England where I went to study design." I noticed Adam's body tense beside me.
"I couldn't ignore the spark we had. Neither could he. He was a tourist there and I found myself drawn to him.. We used to see each other whenever I was free and I used to show him the sights in London. We were joined at the hip. And like every other cliche story, I fell in love with him.. and he with me... although I'm not sure if he really loved me."
A tear drop fell down and I swallowed the emotion that was threatening to burst. Adam's grip on my hand tightened and I looked at him, staring at me intently.
"He left me... Just like that. For some model in Europe... I got a text from him two years ago that he was done with me. That I didn't love him enough. He used me.. He used my body... and that's it. It was over like it never happened."
I took a deep breath to calm myself down, the tears now falling continuously.
"I was a wreck. Lance knows. Arthur, Tristan and Taylor know. I didn't eat for days and threw up whenever Lance made me eat things. They had to take me to the hospital numerous times because I used to faint or have panic attacks every now and then. I even tried to... hurt myself... Too bad I survived..."
"Don't say that." Adam whispered.
"Lance found me bleeding.. I saw the fear in his eyes... He didn't leave my side once this whole time. Arthur and Tristan had to go to England but Lance stayed with me through it all. Made me go to therapists, made me eat, walk, have fun, smile... He was there the whole time which is why he's so protective of me. He afraid for me..."
"I closed myself in my house for the last one and a half year and just stayed in there when I was done with everything... I came out of my solitude nearly a month ago."
I felt Adam's arm come around me and pull me close to him. I didn't flinch, I didn't hesitate. I just rest my head on his shoulder while he held me close.
"Thank you.. for telling me everything... I understand, I really do..." He told me and his arm tightened around me. "Why do you cover your eyes?"
I hesitated a bit decided to tell him.
"My relationship with... Michael went public... He was a famous model and tourist, and I didn't hesitate when I was with him because everything felt right with him. They knew who I was. 'Michael Woods' girlfriend..' The blue eyed beauty... I wanted to hide myself from people. They used to recognize me and call me out in public as his girlfriend even after we broke up, because my eyes made me different, and also because our pictures were everywhere." I chuckled a bit then realized something.
"I didn't know he had a sister, Milani. I saw her that day at the party, with you... He never talked about his family.. not even to me so I thought he didn't have any."
Adam tensed beside me knowing it was his turn to talk.
"Milani was... my first love. We met a few years back at a party. I felt an attraction to her. I used to have girlfriends before but I was never really serious with them. Just a playboy. But we got together soon.. and I fell in love with her... but I realized my mistake when I went to her house one day to surprise her on her birthday... She was with someone else in her room. She cheated on me and I later found out she had been cheating on me for quite a long time. She was only interested in my money. Nothing else. She left me broken... I drank a lot, became an even worse workaholic to take my mind off of things... that is until I met.. you.."
I turned to look at him but he was looking at the ground.
"You were like a breath of fresh air in my life... a light that brightened up my day.. For some reason I wanted to be patient for you.. Wait for you... and you make me nervous.." He chuckled, still looking at the ground. I smiled at him.
I make him nervous?
"I make you nervous?' I smiled, looking at him, and he looked up at me finally and I could see the emotion in his eyes.
"Yes... you make me nervous as hell.. You make me want to be better.. for you.. to wait for you.." He smiled at me and I smiled back.
"You have pretty eyes.. and a really nice smile." I told him, touching his face, stroking his cheek gently. He put his hand on top of mine as I cupped his cheek and I leaned forward to kiss him, giving him a small peck on his lips before pulling away.
"I'm sorry for this morning.. I didn't mean the things I said." I finally told him and he nodded.
"I know.. It's alright... but I have to ask you... is there something going on between you and.. Gareth? I saw you two sleeping here on the couch and even before.. you both seem close." He said slowly, like he was thinking what to say.
"Gareth and me? No!" I laughed a bit. "He's my cousin and like a brother to me... he was the one who told me t talk with you and fix things.. He was there for me when my brothers were in England.." I told him and Adam smiled.
"Right.. I still don't like him though." He said and I chuckled.
"Why? Are you jealous?" I asked him and he frowned.
"Jealous? Me? I don't think so." He chuckled and pulled away from me, already making me feel colder than I was before. His embrace kept me warm and now that his arms weren't around me everything felt cold.
"So are we... are we good?" He finally asked me after a moment's silence.
"Yeah.. we're good." I told him and I could see him relax.
"Does that mean I can ask you out on a second date? Tomorrow, maybe?" He looked at me hopefully and I smiled.
"Yeah... I'd like that a lot.." I smiled at him and we both got up.
"Will you stay for dinner?" I asked him but he shook his head.
"I have to go to my father's house.. he invited me there for dinner. Rain check?" He asked me and I nodded my head.
"Okay then, I'll see you tomorrow at.."
"5 pm"
"5 pm? Why?" I asked him dumbfounded.
"Why? Were you hoping to stay the night with me?" He looked at me playfully and I smacked his arm. "I'm joking.. There's a fair tomorrow... and an art exhibition. I'd like to take you there."
"Okay then.. I won't keep you any longer." I smiled at him before he left.
Taking a deep breath I plopped on the couch when Gareth came in.
"So did you guys kiss and make-up?" He asked smiling.
"Yeah.. I guess we did.."
"Good.. Cause we're watching a movie!" He laughed and slammed the door open and jumped on the couch with popcorn in his hands.
I laughed at him and we both settled on the couch before opening Netflix to choose a movie.
Things might just be fine after all...
.......................................................................................................
What do you think is in store for Isabelle and Adam as they start on this rocky path? Will things be good or will they take an unfortunate turn?
Keep reading to find out!
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