Two Old Friends: Phase 9

"Sam... there's..."

Kenneth swallowed. Bakit parang bigla siyang nahirapang magsalita?

"There's something that I want to tell you..."

Samantha froze. Her heart beat faster as it was already pounding inside her chest.

"I don't know where to start..."

Paano nga ba? How can he tell her how he feels? It has been fifteen years ago. How can he make her believe na pareho pa rin ang nararamdaman niya para sa kanya hanggang ngayon?

Not knowing what to do, Kenneth moved and took her hands, held them and placed them onto his chest.

"Sam... I know this sounds weird... crazy... inappropriate... but this is what's inside my heart. This is what I feel for you. For all these years, it hasn't changed."

Samantha looked at her hand. She can feel Kenneth's heart beating as wildly as hers.

"You're very special to me. You... you're my first love. And I still do... love you..."

Napatingin si Samantha kay Kenneth. His eyes are pouring his heart out to her. She can see the love that he feels for her. And by looking at those eyes and feeling his heart on her touch, she can feel the truth of that feeling.

And she feels the same way. She feels her feelings for him did not change either. She still loves him. Just like before.

"I love you, Sam..."

Naramdaman na lamang ni Samantha ang mga luha sa kanyang mga mata. It feels so wonderful to know that the person you love also feels the same way. She has been dreaming of that moment for so long... like, for fifteen long years.

Yes... that's what she wanted to hear fifteen years ago. But she didn't. And a lot has happened in that fifteen years. Reality suddenly struck her.

"Kenneth..."

"I know... Masyadong mabilis. We've been friends... best friends. But, I'm sure. I'm sure what I felt for you was more than that."

"Kenneth... are you sure?"

Samantha let go and turned her back on him. She can't tell him what she needs to tell him. And it hurts. It hurts because she feels so much for him, but she knows it's wrong.

"Are you sure about what you said? Baka akala mo lang... akala mo lang mahal mo ako."

Kenneth held her shoulders. "Sigurado ako sa sinasabi ko."

Samantha moved away. "No!"

Nagtatakang napatingin na lamang si Kenneth.

"Si Kristine... what about her? Didn't you even love her? Ikinasal kayo... nagkaanak kayo. Tapos sasabihin mo ngayon mahal mo ako? Na hindi nawala ang pagmamahal mo sa akin?"

"Hindi ko alam," Kenneth said. "I loved Kristine. Totoo ang lahat ng naramdaman ko sa kanya. But before I fell in love with her, there was you. And now that you're back in my life, everything that I felt back then seems to come back also. And suddenly I'm in love with you again."

Walang alam sabihin si Samantha. She just looked at Kenneth and cried. If he only knows how she really feels. But she can't tell him because it would be wrong. It would be so wrong.

"Maybe it's destiny. It's what made you come back to my life... because in the end, it would be us. In the end, we would be together," Kenneth said.

Samantha shook her head. "Kenneth..."

She needs to tell him the truth. She wants to tell him the truth. But she can't. For the truth will break his heart. The truth will break her heart.

"Nagkakamali ka lang sa nararamdaman mo. Hindi mo ako mahal, Kenneth. Hindi mo ako mahal!"

Tumakbo pabalik sa may rest house si Samantha. Dahil sa pagkabigla ay hindi siya kaagad nasundan ni Kenneth.

"Sam!"

Susundan na sana siya nito nang dumating na sina Ryan, Jenneth, at ang natutulog nang si Darlene.

"Kenneth!" tawag ni Ryan.

Ryan and Jenneth gave him a questioning look. Hindi naman malaman ni Kenneth ang isasagot. Jenneth decided to go and follow Samantha.

Napaupo naman si Kenneth sa mga wood logs na inuupuan nila kanina. He took his phone back and turned off the music. Naupo na rin si Ryan na kalong-kalong ang tulog na si Darlene.

"Can you tell me what happened?" Ryan asked.

"I don't know, Ry. I don't know what happened. Everything seemed right. The music, the stars, the moment... Everything."

"Then what went wrong?"

Napailing na lamang si Kenneth. "Hindi ko alam... I told her that I love her."

"And?"

"Sabi niya baka mali lang daw ako ng akala. Hindi ko daw siya mahal... Siguro hindi lang talaga niya ako gusto. Hindi niya ako magawang mahalin ng higit pa sa isang kaibigan."

Ryan looked at him. "I don't think so."

Kenneth looked at him. Ryan is having second thoughts if he will tell him the truth because he made a promise he wouldn't. But it's the only way he could let Kenneth know how Samantha really feels for him.

𝘚𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺, 𝘚𝘢𝘮... He has to tell Kenneth the truth.

"Nung prom natin, hindi talaga dapat pupunta noon si Sam. Truth is, wala talaga siyang balak magpunta. Sinabi lang niya iyon para magpunta ka kasi gustong-gusto ni Kristine na makasama ka sa gabing iyon."

"Pero nagpagawa pa siya ng damit niya. Bumili pa ng sapatos... Hindi totoo iyan, 'di ba?"

"She just did that para mapaniwala ka na pupunta siya. But she really didn't plan on going."

"...She did that for me?"

"And for Kristine."

Biglang parang nakonsensiya si Kenneth. Not only because Samantha did it for his late wife, but because Samantha lied because of his late wife.

"You see, Sam also feels something special for you back then. Nung una hindi pa niya iyon alam. She found out about it, though, when it was already too late. Nalaman na niya na may gusto sa iyo si Kristine. Pinili niya na magparaya para sa inyong dalawa.

"That night, nung prom, I was able to persuade her to come. She stayed with the crowd and watched us do the cotillion dance. Babalikan ko sana siya kaagad, but then the King and Queen was announced. It was you and Kristine, and then you danced together, alone… looking lovingly at each other. And from that night, everything about you and Kristine changed. And from that night, Sam's heart was broken."

"I didn't know," Kenneth said defensively. "Hindi ko alam na may ganoon siyang nararamdaman para sa akin."

"Pare, she was your first love. Pero nabulag ka ng pagkagusto mo kay Kristine. I don't blame you. Kristine is a great girl. You were young... innocent... It was meant to happen. No regrets."

Ryan looked at the sleeping Darlene. Napatingin rin doon si Kenneth.

"No regrets..." Kenneth said.

"It was meant to happen. She was meant to be born in this world. Siguro kasi meron siyang misyon na gagampanan sa buhay mo."

Ryan stopped before he was able to talk about Kristine's wish to Darlene.

"You messed up before, Ken, but fate gave you another chance to make it right. Hahayaan mo na lang ba na ganoon-ganoon na lang ang lahat?"

Kenneth looked at Ryan. Of course not. Hindi niya na palalampasin pa ulit ang pagkakataong ito. Hindi siya papayag na mawala na naman ang babaeng mahal niya. Kaso lang...

"But, she doesn't want to."

"Just give her time, Ken. Maaayos din ang lahat."

Tumango si Kenneth. Ryan is right. Maybe Samantha just needs more time to accept it. If he was able to wait for fifteen years, sure he can wait for a few more days.