Chapter 54: Failing The Test

Perseus POV

The first test was basically a 1 on 1 interview with my grandfather and several supervisors who is there to see if I can qualify as the youngest teacher's assistant ever.

To be even an assistant, you either need to be a super smart scholar who has a lot of accomplishments or a minimum be a 5 star mage. I'm still stuck on the 3rd, but they have no doubt that I'll reach the 5th soon.

It was a couple simple questions which I answered normally at first.

"You catch a student intaking drugs, what should you say to them when you reprimand them?" My grandfather asked

"Depends on what drug they're taking, what is it? LSD, PCP, heroine, cocaine, marijuana?"

"Marijuana." he replied

"Which type or strain? Northern lights, golden goat, white widow, blue dream...etc?"

"Ok this isn't a part of the interview, but how do you know these names?"

"A lot of research."

And that does not include intaking them, don't misunderstand, my readers.

"I got a question too, can't magic cure almost everything, why worry?"

"It's with that mindset that there is an increase of the pricing for curing them, let's say they're intaking meth."

I then cleared my throat.

"'Is that a meth pipe that I see in your hands, no don't run away'...I would then sit him down and say 'You want to know what my dad said to me once he caught me smoking? He handed me a lighter and said, Perseus, you're going to smoke all of it till you can't look at a cigarette no more, smoke it bitch, smoke it all.'"

"No! You're just encouraging them even more." One of the supervisors cut in "How do even know what a meth pipe is?"

"No, it's called using reverse psychology. It works effectively, you use what they love against them. Besides, this scenario is meth, every other scenario would be different."

"Ok, what about a cigerette?"

"I would take it smash it on the ground and stomp on it several times while verbally abusing them till they cry and not think about it anymore."

"I'm gonna regret asking a third scenario, but..." My grandpa then hesitated for a while "What if it's marijuana?"

"Give me that!...Where's your lighter?"

*****

"Okay, let's just move on, you were clearly joking." My grandpa said as he prepared the next question

Let's hope I am.

"Your student is going to be a hero, many would discriminate them and bully them due to high expectations." he said "They approached you, how would you advise them, pretend that I'm the student or hero."

"Ok, who bullied you?"

"He's the son of a count from the B class."

"Does he have a sister?"

"...Yes? A twin."

"I know a good café, here's the address, get her there, get in the mood and date her to assert dominance."

His face is just priceless.

"That's a bit far, is it not?" he questioned

"I would say his mother, but that's far, besides, free wife, making your bully as a brother in law is asserting dominance."

"Ok, different scenario, the bully is a duke's daughter who slapped me and humiliated me in front of everyone."

"Slap her back, she got a lot more reputation on the line, you may be a hero, but you're relatively new and unknown apart from your title. And it's not like a duke would sue a hero, so he'll most like take a neutral stance. Humiliate her with that slap since-"

"That's not what a gentleman will do." he blurted out "You would hit a woman?

"First of all, she hit me first in this scenario, secondly, I yearn for true gender equality, and so if a woman hit me and humiliate me, I will not hesitate to dropkick that woman. If someone is willing to dish something out, they should also be able to take it."

I'm never going to get recruited into anything, this is great, and my attitude isn't serious, so it's not like they can just say I'm a bad person, I mean, I tried at the beginning.

*****

3rd Person POV

They then brought Perseus and his 2 companions to a training room to practice actual scenarios of accompanying the heroes.

"Just out of curiosity, milady, what do you see in him?" Laker asked Ruka "It's clear that he's failing on purpose, my daughter and her wife were probably insistent and he came here to just shut them up."

Perseus overheard all of it, he's now listening to everything to not miss out what people say about him behind his back

"He's actually a pretty nice person, despite his complaints the other day, he helped an old woman close up her shop and walk her home, he just likes to pretend to be a terrible person." Ruka answered "He just hates it when people go for him looking for answers to complicated situations."

"Shouldn't he be proud that people are going to him to help their situations? It means that he's reliable."

"Exactly, he hates that, he just wants a life where he can live peacefully, that's why we started the business, for money and his goal is to just wander around the world, and I plan to just go with him."

*****

Perseus POV

"What do you mean that I have to wait for him to be a threat?"

So they gave me a wooden sword and had 2 people act out a scene. As an assistant teacher for the heroes, I'll be expected to join them in fighting crime. And in this case is a bank robbery. They had these 2 people walk out of a magic door.

One was walking out normally, the other ran out the moment an alarm(someone was ringing a bell to signal it) and tried to walk away nervously while purposely acting nervous with the shifty eyes, so I, of course attacked him, like fake attack of course, not an actual hit.

"He wasn't a threat." one of the supervisors argued "You just clubbed him at the back of the head."

"Oh c'mon, he was clearly the criminal."

"But he wasn't a threat, he was fleeing, you must only draw your weapon when they were a threat, he didn't even turn and draw out his weapon yet."

"So I should wait for the criminal to take a sword to my throat? No thank you!"