RudyGasparrini

I got used to death before, after my grandmother, my uncle Peter, and a few of my parents' high school friends. I thought I'd be able to get used to it out here too, but I guess things are different when you're the one causing the death and when you have no one to help you get over it.

I wish I could do things right. For myself, for the people around me, the people I love. It never works out that way though. I do stupid shit and it has consequences, I know it does but I keep doing it. It's like my body will do anything to survive but my mind wants the exact opposite. 

This is not a story about love. It is not a story about heartbreak but my life revolves around that. After what I did to him it's all it can revolve around. I deserve death. He deserved to take me with him, but he didn't. Unfortunately I'm still here.



---A spin-off to the After Death series. This story focuses on a new group of survivors, including an apocalypse-orphaned 17 year old boy from Ohio named Valentine Evans, as they struggle to make a life for themselves. 

Warning: This story contains adult content and is intended only for mature audiences

FEAR WHAt I'LL BECOME AFtER DEAtH

"I can't believe him. What a fucking animal."


"Maverick, don't you think you're overreacting? He's the one who lost his kid-"


"Overreacting? Are you fucking kidding me? He had his dead daughter in his backpack for who knows how long! That's sick, why are you trying to justify it?"


"If you lost Andie would it really be that easy for you to just let him go?"


"You think he's not insane? Fine, then go, live a happy life with him. You're probably just as fucking insane as he is. All you've ever cared about was Valentine, I bet you carry his bones in your pockets. You meant nothing to him, Cole did and he killed him. I should have fucking killed him when I had the chance."


"Maybe it would have gotten rid of you faster. I should have let you kill yourself that day on the beach! You're the reason my fucking wife is dead. You're the reason everyone's dead!"


"You tried to kill him? You told me you tried to save him!"


"He murdered my best friend what do you expect! You should just be grateful I didn't kill him! Shouldn't that be enough?"


"You're not gonna shoot me. You can't kill anyone, it's about time you stop trying and just accept that. You shouldn't be alive. You don't deserve it, so many people had to die because of you!"


"All this time, I thought you actually gave a shit about what I was going through but really you're just glad he's gone."


"No, you did. Why didn't you leave the beach then? If you really didn't care why did you stay with me for five years?"


"It's not that I didn't care about you."


"That's what you just fucking said! What the hell is wrong with you?"


"You'll never get to Texas without me. Andie will just be another person to die because of you. You ready to be a parent? You couldn't keep him safe."


"I raised your son for five fucking months after he was born because you were too busy getting drunk!"


"Because I know you, you won't do it! We have places to be, we don't have time for this! Just give me the-"


Chapter 17 (Backstabber)