(( There's a sequel following but it doesnt end in tension ))


Merely a punk .
That's all I was, an idiot 
telling myself, convincing myself that the world is only a dark broken place. 
The only friends I had were my cigarettes, the drug dealers. Now and then some beers .

I never planned anything or cared for anything since I always knew how pointless everything was . I was one human out of a millions. My existence wasn't worth more than than an ants. 
It's merely a waste of time.

It has always been dark .

until I met a spark.

Beautiful and pure . Something so rare and special that I couldn't take my eyes off of him . Yes him. 
I hated him for changing me .

But No matter how much I tried to push him away .
He wouldnt leave, because he knew me better than I did myself 
he knew I needed him . 
But he needed me too.

Man they thought I was fucked up .
But it's the ones who don't show .

My name is Kim Jongin and 
this isn't my story

It's Do Kyungsoos .

Intoxic Dose (kaisoo) 

The next 2 days there was no sign of him .. not at school not outside or a message or anything . I told myself i didnt care since i hated him more than anything else but it still botherd me that there was not a single sign of him .

I'm running low on the money again aswell .. yesterday i had given them another 200 leaving me only 100 and today i've sold the neckless of my mother to get another 100 . I paid them 200 yesterday morning when i went to school so now i dont have any money and i still need another 200 for today ..

/"doh kyungsoo ?/" I turned my head to look up over to see hus empty seat .. hes not here today too .

I hate the fact that i felt guilty .. but as always i ended up just blaming him . He shouldnt have trusted an asshole like me . Kiss me back the way he did before passing out and leaving all the money so open .. i hate him . I hate him so much .

Blaming