Chapter 5

   One unfaithful night, I couldn't sleep. I felt too restless. I tried waking my older brother, and my older sister but none of them agreed to stay awake with me so I decided to meet my so-called friend.

    He wasn't asleep and he seemed to have a visitor as well,but I didn't mind. I just went to him and sat on his lap. Maybe I will sleep. I hated darkness. It scares me,but my olders siblings  love sleeping in darkness.

    He asked why I came to his room,I told him without hesitating,and agreed and starting petting me, suddenly I felt his hands pulling my pajamas down,I kept quiet pretending to sleep,he hesitated for a while but continued, I stayed still, totally , confused.

     when he finally succeeded in pulling down my pajamas I felt his hands in my private part,and worse of all his visitor stared at him not in shock,but he had an amused look on his face.

     I still made sure to hide my face on his chest like I was deeply asleep even pretending to snore, at first they were shocked to hear the sound of snoring but it gave them a sense of assurance that I wasn't aware.

  He continued rubbing my private area until I felt a penetration,it was painful.I flinched but he removed his hands immediately but continued after I calmed down.

       He continued deeping his fingers and it became more painful but I urged myself to be calm. I really wanted to see the end result, I closed my eyes trying to endure the pain and before I knew it my eyelids became heavy,I felt dizzy and lightheaded I fell into a deep slumber, the pain was affecting me so bad enduring it was worse, I don't know how it happened but after that incident I woke up on my bed .

       The next day I confronted him,with so much hesitation and curiousity, I walked up to him, have been feeling different ever since I woke up, telling Jane might not be too good, she would tell Grandma, my brother wasn't the closet of friend, mom wasn't here either.

    As everyones attention drifted  away from me I confronted him about the previous  night, hoping I would get  a proper answer, but instead he threatened me, with death, no child would want to get killed .

     He would lure  me to his room all in the name of playing and be would repeat the same thing over and over again when he thought I was already asleep,on day I felt his tongue in my private area he was licking me down there gently I couldn't hold to urge to run away.

  But death wasnt an option, and i wanted to know the outcome, little did I know I was digging my grave because I wanted to feed my curiosity.

     He brought out his private part and rubbed it in my private area,I felt scared I lost my courage and I stood up immediately,he was shocked and confused he continued staring at me,It felt like centuries and I couldn't talk I just stared at him until he grabbed me forcefully and pushed me on his bed forcing his lips on mine,  biting my lips and tongue forcefully,I stared at him with tears in my eyes.

     Why would he put saliva in my mouth as well? What did I do to him and he bit my tongue? I felt blood in my mouth,my lips were bleeding,he stared at me with no remorse in his eyes, just lust for a girl of five.

    At that age I didn't understand what he was doing to me I only knew it was bad, painful and scary,he repeated the same thing but this time it was more forceful I couldn't hold myself I started screaming and decided to run out of the room but he held my hair and grabbed my arm,I tried release myself while shouting for help 

    I was in pain and my voice wasn't that audible but I still tried, he held my neck and closed my mouth with his other hand and uttered the word I will never forget.

    " If you don't want you and your entire family to die and be burned alive, better shut up,if you talk about what I have been doing to you I will kill you". before he could say anything my grandma came out he released me instantly.

  My knees were hurting, already same with my bruised lips,but there goes another life threath, my grandparents were already out with their lamp, I was already down in tears.

  " What is it reth" grandma asked, "ugogo, a snake " I called her ugogo which means grandma in Zulu.

     My grandma looked at my teary eyes and took pity on me,"what a fragile child,she was frightened by a snake,thank god she wasn't biten by a poisonous snake" she said .

    she led me  to my room but I refused to sleep there,I don't know if he would kill me or my siblings because of me,or maybe trying putting his private part in mine, it seemed big and long.

     My grandparents thought It was the snake that made me cry but I was so scared of a beast In sheep clothing .i decided to sleep in my grandma's room it was comfortable and I felt protected, I finally slept off.

       The next morning he was nowhere to be found,my grandma said he had to leave very early because he has a bussiness meeting, but I knew he couldn't take the risk, neither could I, I love my family and I won't want them to die,it was a horrible experience, I wouldn't dare tell Anyone .