Chapter forty one

Ruper's pov

For the past weeks, I have been tortured and stitched, now I am calling to God 

If there is one I need him now, I am begging for death, I need to die, it is better for me it is easy for me.

These men are callous they don't allow weapons near me, my strength is not enough to fight for one.

I need to be a swift one to end this misery,

I need to leave this body it is etched with so much pain.

It scares me to see the man in the black tuxedo with eyes that flame with vengeance,

I know he is the one that keeps me alive 

Waiting for when he is filled, when his pain subsides, but that will never happen,

So I seek death like a beggar in a market.

He is here again this time with someone,

My eyes are still closing I can't see properly 

But I hear her scent, I know her scent 

She looks beautiful as the first time we met.

her hair smells like roses which are etched in my sense I try to see her face,    I try to look but strength leaves my bones.

She comes closer and I can see pity on her face

I can see how she looks me, nothing like the fear I coveted, she holds something in her hand, it looks like mercy, the is an angel 

I can't tell she will take me home, I try to smile but my lips do not part, they are tired I wait for it,

She talks for a while and my tension grows 

I yearn for it, she teases me with her speech  I hear it as a hymn 

As I wait patiently for her to release me to sleep,

My little angel, relax and wait as forever stands between us and her words pull it close 

And I wait for her still after the speech her hands her shaky, her eyes are uncertain,

She needs something, someone to help her

I have to help her, so she will be quick I have to say something, something nice something she would like.

I open my mouth and it is darkness now, I hear no sounds I feel nothing at all, she has saved me, thank you for this piece

I wish she can hear me, I hope she would hear me just this once as I fade.

           **              **           **        **

My hands are shaky, I try to steady them, but I can't, the trigger feels heavy, I can't imagine giving up after all the different ways I imagined killing him.

I close my eyes and open them, I point it straight at his head I feel his lips part to say something.

I remember the darkroom where he kept me I remember his voice and all he said, I try not to remember what he did, but I can  see it once more and the trigger becomes jelly,

I hear the sound and feel the heat, his silence fills the room,

I look to my side Antonio smiles, and motions to the boys to take it away.

I just shot a man, it feels my head, I feel different .