Remembrance

Deming was resting on the bed since he hadn't done rehab yet. Xunyi stayed beside him as she helped him to cut up apple into small pieces. He looked at Xunyi then reached out his hand and touched Xunyi's delicate soft hand.

"Xunyi..." Even though he was lacking in energy, his voice was still smooth and deep. She looked into his beautiful grey eyes and replied, "Yes?"

"How's your progress in law school?" He asked. She pouted and looked at him. "You just woke up and you're asking me how is school?" Deming slightly chuckled and replied, "It's okay if you don't want to tell me. If not school, then how are my parents and my sister?" He waited patiently for an answer while Xunyi suddenly stopped cutting up the apple. She faced him and replied, "Deming, before I tell you. Can you promise me one thing?"

"Sure, what is it?" He replied.

"Promise me you won't get mad at me."

"I promise." He replied.

"Your uncle caused an accident that killed your parents. When I was helping him as an intern, I didn't know that he used me. While I tried to get more experience, I ended up being too naïve and trusted him. I'm also at fault. I'm sorry."

Hearing the devastating news, Deming's hands clenched, but he knew it wasn't Xunyi's fault. It was difficult for him to accept that his parents were gone. Xunyi sat beside him. She could tell he wanted to cry, and she wanted to hold him, but she was now hesitating because of what she told him. But something inside of her stirred up. She didn't know what it was. Was it pity or love? Her heart ached when she saw his expression of brokenness.

She stood up and gently embraced him again. This time, she didn't say a word. She knew that part of it was her fault for being so naïve, but she couldn't leave his side, no matter what. She became bolder with her action and words.

"Deming, I understand I cannot replace your parents. But I want to be your comforter and shelter. I apologize for my previous wrongdoings. If you want me to leave, you can just push me away." Instead, Deming pulled her closer. His voice trembled and tears fell. Xunyi closed her eyes and gently caressed the back of his head. His cry became louder and almost uncontrollable. It was her first time hearing a man's cry. His crying pierced her heart like a thousand daggers. Her tears fell as well, and they embraced each other until he calmed down.

After he calmed down, he apologized that he lost control of his emotions, but Xunyi shook her head. "Take as long as you need. I'll be right here with you."

Since the weather was still cold, Deming was confined indoors, so Xunyi took him around the hospital in a wheelchair.. The large hospital had a man-made garden with fresh flowers and sunlight for patients to enjoy..

It was Xunyi's first time inside the man-made garden and she was in awe. She wheeled him around and they saw many beautiful planted flowers and plants.

"Deming, do you have any favorite flowers in here?" She asked. Deming shook his head, "All of them look nice. How about you?"

"Me? The same, I can't choose one. It's too difficult." She smiled and wheeled him beside a bench. They could enjoy the warm sunshine despite the cold weather. Xunyi brought an extra soft and light blanket inside her bag and placed it on Deming's laps.

"Thank you." Deming softly replied. Xunyi took out thermos water bottle and poured the boiled water into a cup, then mixed it with cold water. She tested it first before giving it to him.

"Here you go." She added a straw so he could easily drink the warm water. He was still weak in his arms and legs, so Xunyi had to help him. Ever since he started rehab, Deming is improving at a slow rate. Xunyi was hopeful that one day Deming would be able to fully recover. Xunyi stayed with Deming during every rehab session.

That afternoon, it was another grueling rehab session. Xunyi watched as Deming struggled to walk. He wasn't able to put much strength into his legs. A rehab assistant and Xunyi both encouraged him to walk. It was difficult seeing Deming in so much pain and stress. The rehab assistant gave them a ten minutes' break, so Xunyi wiped his sweat and gave him water to drink.

"Deming, you can do it. I'm with you. Don't be afraid." Xunyi comforted him and gave him hope to continue on. Deming nodded and tried his best until the rehab session was over.

That evening, Anna came, and she set up a small memorial at one of the hospital rooms. In order to use it, she asked for permission and framed pictures of her sister- and brother-in-law.. She placed it on the tablecloth, then lit up a few battery-powered candles. She placed a few white carnations and pink carnations inside a glass vase, since these were her sister's favorite colors. Xunyi and Deming entered the room after a nurse led them.

Xunyi wheeled him in front of the table, and they bowed out of respect. Since Deming wasn't able to go outside, Anna thought of a way to hold a small memorial in remembrance of his parents. The room was dimly lit and quiet. Deming wasn't used to quietness. He could still remember his mother nagging him and his sister and his father reading his morning newspaper with a cup of delicious coffee. Xunyi slowly walked up to him and embraced him from the back of the wheelchair.

"Xunyi... I'm afraid. How did you deal with when you lost your parents?" After asking, Deming's voice was trembling and he could barely talk. Xunyi held him as long as he wanted to.

"It was difficult. But Deming, remember you are their beloved son. They loved you. They will continue to live inside of you. You have their blood flowing through you. Sometimes, you will feel helpless, sometimes you will feel anger, but you can't lose yourself. You still have people around you who love you. Your colleagues, Susie, your aunt, your sister, and myself. We will be with you. You are not alone. You are still needed. Deming, I'm here for you." She hugged him tightly because she understands the feeling of loneliness, helplessness, and anger when her own parents died.