Enri’s feelings

>>Mavis

Night loomed over and I sat on the edge of the open corridor staring at the sky. The palace has such a big and vast architecture that it would make anyone feel small. I relaxed looking at the distant darkness when I heard someone approach me.

"What are you doing here?" Enri walked toward me from the other end of the corridor.

"Nothing," I replied, "Just looking at the sky."

He turned his head to look around at the sky and smiled. It was a full moon today and thus a bright night. One part of this huge hallway is open and leads to the training grounds and other open areas while the other side is closed with walls and doors, leading inside the palace.

"The moon is beautiful." He smiled softly, "Isn't it?" Making my heart skip a beat.

"Uh," I nodded as my heart began to act weird, "Yea," He came and sat down next to me, making me feel all nervous but he seemed fine. I guess he just said it because he really found the moon pretty and doesn't know that the phrase, 'The moon is beautiful' has another meaning, "Are you done with your work?" I asked, trying to distract myself.

"Yea," He seemed a little relaxed.

"You look relaxed." I said, "Did something happen?"

He smiled, "Just thinking." While he was looking at the moon, I couldn't help but stare at him. He's really good-looking. He looks dashing with and without his uniform but he looks the most savory in his tight shirts and those soldier pants.

"About what?" I asked softly. That red hair of his just looks so good on him too.

"That I'm glad I found you." He stared at the moon, "I was afraid I won't be able to." He turned to look at me.

AH~

That soft expression of his that he rarely shows will be the end of me.

"I'm sure you would have found me no matter what," I turned my head away subtly and looked at the sky.

"What makes you so sure?"

"Because I don't really have anywhere to go."

"Ah," He chuckled softly, "I see," I glanced at him. Seeing him laugh lightly brought me joy and it made me feel warm.

"Say," I swung my feet, "Is there something going on with your family?"

"Hmm?" He knitted his brows, "What makes you think that?" As soon as I mentioned his family, his expressions changed.

"Just," I glanced at him, "When mom attacked you, you said something about your mom."

It hit him, "Ah!" He looked away, "That…" A frown came over his face, "Yea…" And all the relaxed features of his tensed up.

I placed my hand on his that was resting on the floor, "You seemed really troubled all of the sudden…" I wanted to give him a kiss, "Is everything okay? You probably haven't recovered completely. "You shouldn't have come to me so fast!"

"I'm fine," He said but didn't remove my hand from his.

"What are you thinking about now?"

"Just, about what if's,"

"What?" I got confused, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"What if you left?" The look in his eyes, that look of innocent sadness made my heart flip and my cheeks flushed.

"I already told you, I have nowhere to go really…" I bit my lower lip softly, "So I would have been there for the next few weeks…"

A gentle smile spread across his face that made my chest squeeze. It was a smile of reassurance. He placed his hand on mine which was on his, "That's a relief to hear."

"You've already found me though," The red tint on my face had no sign of leaving.

"I'm glad I wasn't late…" He looked at me softly, "I honestly just never thought about it," He scoffed lightly, "That I'd die this soon so when I got injured that badly, so many things just came to me as regret. One of the things was about my family."

"Like your mom?" I remembered his words.

He nodded, "I was always angry at her because she never stood up to my father." I got closer to him. I wonder if he noticed what I was pulling.

"What did your father do?" I asked because I saw the sadness in his eyes when he talked about his family.

"In noble families, the eldest son always inherits the title, the others are pretty much useless."

"Hey…" That was sort of sad

"I'm the third son." He took a deep breath. "But I was always talented in swordsmanship. My second brother though, he was really good in academics but my father forced him to join the knights and he was drafted into the war."

"I see…"

"And he died there." When he said that, a frown appeared on his face. He looked really pained.

"Oh…" I wasn't expecting this to take such a dark turn.

"He had begged my mother to convince my father to let him leave the army but mother never had the courage to speak up."

"Is that why you hate your mother?" I know this is supposed to be sad, but I'm a little happy that he's telling me about his family and his regrets.

"I don't really hate her… She and my dad never got along," He sighed, "But I just can't get regrets out of my heart." He looked up at the sky, "Even after the source of that misery is long gone." His eyes looked so distant and I couldn't help but place my hand on his cheek.

He flinched when I did that but didn't remove it. He sighed, "But my mom… I wasn't a good son to her."

"But you still go to see your mother right?" I said, "Every time she calls you, you go."

"I can't stop myself…" He sighed, "She is my mom."

"Maybe it's time to let go of the grudge and go talk to her," I smiled, "Maybe you've always wanted to mend things."

"Perhaps…" He sighed, "But I can't seem to forgive her for doing nothing when my brother was sent off to war. Everyone in the house knew he had no talent for the sword."

"Maybe she couldn't do anything." He looked at me in surprise and I placed my other hand on his other cheek, "You just said your parents didn't have a good relationship. Maybe your dad never listened to her."

"..." He thought about it, "Maybe…" He nodded, "That's most likely true." A sad smile appeared on his face, "Perhaps I just blamed her because I wanted someone to blame." His smile vanished, "I was very close to my brother."

The fact that he was telling me all of this made me feel important, because this was intimate information.

"She might be suffering too." I said and he turned his body to face mine, "She's already lost one son, why would you give her the pain of losing another." He looked into my eyes and stared into his with my hands cupping his face.

"You seem so mature for your age." A soft smirk appeared on his face.

"I'm older than you think," I told him and I drew my body closer to his, "You heard the conversation I had with the oracle, didn't you?"

This might have been instinctive on his part, but as I got closer to him, he moved his hands and placed them on my waist, "I got caught?"

I smirked at his remark, "So I'll tell you this, mentally, I'm older than you." I moved my right hand and slid it down his face, brushing it against his neck, then placed it on his shoulder.

We looked at each other, sitting at the edge of the corridor, illuminated by moonlight. I saw his eyes, those same eyes that are always filled with passion and leadership, show signs of weakness. 

This was a perfect setup and I wanted to take this chance to kiss him. I slowly removed the distance between our lips and he watched me do it. His action had intensity in it and I could feel it all too well. It made my heart rate spike and I felt nervous but when I moved closer, a thought crossed my mind. 

Isn't this wrong though? He was just sharing family trauma and I'm all horny here.

I should stop.

I began to move back when suddenly, Enri who had his arms around my waist pulled me back and locked his lips onto mine.

Author's note

'The moon is beautiful' has another meaning. It means, "I love you"

The use of this phrase as a code for "I love you" is said to have originated during the 1920s and 1930s in Japan. I think some author once mentioned it too. He confessed his feeling to a girl he liked by saying this because he couldn't gather the courage to tell her directly.