2: A cold heart

Living on the beach in Hawaii and driving a yellow Ferrari on the streets of New York, and I sleep and feel happy and happy.As the days passed, a problem appeared on the horizon, or rather two big problems.

The first problem: It is my family and their treatment of me has changed. None of them anymore care about my opinion on anything that happens at home or in the world.

And those looks when I come home. Their looks say: You disappointed us.

The second problem: How do I get money to buy weed ? Without it, I will sink into a swamp of sadness, pain, and despair. Shortly after the books, I sold the desk and the anchor. The size of my room increased and the emptiness increased.

Then I sold the radio, and in the end I had nothing left to sell, so I sold things belonging to my family members. Everyone started locking their room with the key, as I am the educated family thief. I spent two years like that. I got to know many people who have experienced the bitterness of prison and still engage in theft and drug selling.I learned about the night world, alcohol and prostitution. I visited the nightclubs and hung out with a lot of night girls. I developed friendships without sex with them, a world that made you forget yourself and your mother as well.

Two years in which I lost my ambition and the purpose of my existence. I lost my family and friends. I lost my beloved and the apple of my eye. That was the only girl I loved...yes...and I loved and she loved me. We had been in love with each other since high school. She was like a witch who charmed me with who she was,I was like a magician who cast a spell on her by being me.It was a stormy love inside the fragile heart, stormy in whispers and smiles. I lost my lover when I stopped studying, and after two years of waiting for my return, she was despaired and got married someone else and my problem ended emotionally,And she created from the remains of my feelings a cold-minded person. On her wedding day, I learned the language of silence and that laughter is created for fools...

I retired to my privacy and secluded myself in my room. There is no longer a reason to pass by the places where we sat and talked about the future, and it is no longer easy to pass in front of her house since she has been absent from it forever.I spent many nights at my doorstep until dawn, not feeling the need to sleep.