Chapter 9

( Lucas ★) - ( song for this chapter: Heather )

Me and Sally got along and became good friends. Felix was a really smart kitten and I loved him so much. Sally visited me every single day to check on me and made me eat …I felt loved and respected by this girl…I thought I was in love with her but I was scared.. she was a good friend but I felt something different about this girl… the way she treated me and cared about me made me fall even harder in love with her…I stopped self-harm with her help and care…I was less dizzy because I started eating better and all was because of Sally …the feeling she gave me made me feel really special…I didn't feel like I was useless like I used to feel with Maria... I felt life full of colors again …the little boy inside of me was really happy and felt safe…but …I was still scared…if someone broke my heart again I wouldn't even want to be alive….my dream was to confess to her about how I felt…I decided on a day, the 3rd of December. She liked the snow and being warm inside the house with hot chocolate. I planned a day with a movie, hot chocolate and popcorn because it was the vibes she liked…

When the day came I was ready, my mind and heart were ready as well…Felix was extra happy that day. A while later Sally arrived, I welcomed her with a big smile and a warm hug like we always do. She gave me a small bag of cookies that we both liked. We sat on the couch and she started petting Felix. I couldn't stop but get lost in her beauty, her green deep eyes, her brown hair, and her innocent smile…right when I was going to start the movie my phone rang …it was my doctor, this was unusual I thought...when I answered the phone and stayed outside the living room. I was shocked by what the doctor said, he said in a very serious tone: " hello young man how are you?". I answered in a little cracking voice: " I - I'm fine I think umm..is there something wrong?" … My doctor said: " Well your girlfriend called and told us that you were having many mental breakdowns and the she found a suicide note….We thought it was safer for you to go to a mental hospital just to make sure you were okay and getting along with yourself" …I answered in a really quiet tone trying not to cry: " Um okay…thank you for your time" …. I ended the call and then hit my hand hard on the wall from anger and frustration…"DAMNT!" I screamed and then pulled out the cigarette and got back to burn my arm...I haven't done that since the day I met Sally …

Sally heard me screaming and ran right away to see what was wrong with me. I started crying because I got back to the dark side again from the same person…Sally asked in a worried voice: "Hey … what's wrong ..was this Maria?"… I pushed Sally because of how sad and angry I felt... I got to my bedroom and opened the window and started to get dark thoughts…This day was supposed to be a special day for me and Sally …but it's been destroyed …. I took out another cigarette and then burned it in my arm… Sally was standing at the door and looking at me with a sad look in her eyes…Right then I saw her standing at my door with tears in her eyes but she was trying to be strong for me, we stayed looking at each other for a couple of minutes…. I ran to my bed and I had hidden myself in the blanket.

She said in a serious and worried voice: " Please what's wrong…tell me I'm here for you" …She pulled the blanket away from my face and said: " Are you going to tell me what's wrong or do you want me to find out?"… I got up and got closer to Sally who was sitting on the edge of the bed, I started crying on her shoulder as she started to pet my head and said in a calm voice: " it's okay, take your time and tell me what's wrong when you are ready" … I took a deep breath and said: " THAT BITCH! That bitch got advantage of my weakness again….that's why I'll never show my weakness to anyone! I will never cry in front of anyone anymore!". Then I whipped my tears and looked at the floor…Sally took a deep breath and said: " please tell me what's wrong ..I-I".. She posed and then stayed silent for a bit... I asked: " you what, Sally?". Sally looked at me with tears running down her cheeks: " Please I care about you, you are my only friend and I care about you a lot… please tell me what's wrong…I promise I won't hurt you as anyone did- I - I...I know how it feels to be broken from the one you trust…I-I was in an abusive friendship "…

I was shocked but decided to tell Sally what was wrong, I said in a serious tone: " um…Maria..said to my doctor that….that I wasn't mentally stable so…he wants me to go to a mental hospital …I don't want to go and-and I'm scared and-and I just.." I didn't know what got inside of me but I started crying on her shoulder again, I felt safe telling her what I felt and I was open about my past with Sally…

Sally hugged my head and said with tears in her eyes: " Hey ..look at me.. look. at. me. She sounded serious, I looked at her as warm tears fell down my cheeks...Sally said as she wiped my tears: " You will go to this hospital with a big smile and show them how mature you are okay!? After you go there you will file a case against Maria and take Autumn to live with you okay? And - and this mental hospital will help you heal okay?"… I wiped my tears and rubbed my eyes which turned red after crying and said: " I'll do it for you"….. I took a deep breath and started rubbing my chest for air. Sally looked at me rubbed my back and said: "it's going to be okay…you will be okay and safe just relax okay" ...

I don't know what got inside of me but I just wanted to tell her how much I loved her and cared about her so I took a deep breath and said: " Sally I-I I- ….I love you and I care about you but if you don't feel the same-" …before I could continue Sally got closer and kissed me on the lips. I was shocked but got lost in the kiss…I felt peace in my heart for some moments. When Sally pulled away I kissed her again but this time I was really happy with it…. I never felt loved in this way before…. I have kissed Maria before but this feeling I got with Sally was special...

After I kissed Sally she got to her bag and grabbed a sweater and surprisingly she gave it to me and said: " Keep this sweater with you in the hospital and every time you feel sad or uncomfortable I want you to hug it"… I smiled at her and got to my wardrobe grabbed one of my sweaters and gave it to her. I knew Sally lived alone with a cat named Lucifer and she didn't have any friends in school. By the way, Sally's parents lived far away in another country so Sally was all alone. 

Sally smiled at me and hugged me tightly and I hugged her back. A while later she started helping me pack my clothes in the bag because tomorrow was the day I was leaving for the hospital…it was hard on me because this day was supposed to be the happiest day ever for both me and Sally but it turned out like a peaceful day to remember…Sally was trying to act happy but I knew she was worride for me and afraid to be alone. As we started packing my clothes my phone buzzed. It was a message from Maria asking me to help her with Autumn but I'm not her toy anymore...

Both me and Sally continued our day with the movie as we planned and we had a lot of fun…at the end of the day, Sally had to go to her house. She gave me a warm hug and told me that tomorrow she would come to drive me to the hospital and visit me whenever she could.

Naya♤