No Right Answer

Did she love Em? Could she still love Em? That coursed through her mind as Em lay her down on the bed before coming to lie beside her. Looking upon the man that would be a father to her child, Ria saw nothing but genuine love and tenderness as his hand ran up and down her belly under her shirt.

"I am excited, you know." He said before turning eyes as transparent as diamonds on her, a sheepish smile on his lips.

"That makes one of us." She said she was still far too overwhelmed.

"Even if you aren't, I'll be excited for us both." Then he turned and put his ear to her belly. "Hello, little one. Try not to give mom a hard time, okay?" Then he gently ran his hand back and forth at the base of her stomach where her Adonis line had been. Lifting his head, he gave her a severe look. "You aren't to do anything strenuous. I'm here to do anything, and everything so don't be stubborn." He glared at her, and she raised her hands in submission.

Accepting her surrender, he rose and kissed her, taking her hand in his and squeezing it.

"You will be an excellent mother too."

All Ria could only stare at him as he kissed her cheek before resting his forehead where his lips had been. For several moments they sat just like that until Ria felt the tears start to fall on her hand. Startled, she pulled away to see Em with tears pouring from his eyes and a look of worry and fear as he raised his head to look at her.

"Please don't take this from me, Ria. I know it's an unreasonable request because it's not me who has to bear the burden, but please, please don't get rid of the baby. It's all I have left of what we were, what we have become, and what he meant to us both. It's our culmination. I'll lose everything I cherish if we don't make this work, and I'm not sure how we start over."

Then he wrapped his arms around her waist and bawled in her lap, pulling his legs up tightly against himself. There was no correct answer. Someone was going to get hurt no matter what. If she keeps it, she could get hurt if it wasn't Cú's. If she kept it and it was Cú's, Em got hurt even if he didn't admit it. If she didn't mark it, the baby and all of them could get hurt in one way or another. Was there a lesser of the evils? Ria didn't know. Sitting there stroking Em's head as he cried and cried, all she knew was that nothing was worth the pain they were putting themselves through now.

"It's alright, Em." She ran her fingers through his hair. "I don't think I could get rid of it even if it was the right decision." Besides, it wasn't like she thought he would be a bad father.

That's when her mind went blank. They weren't married, yet she was about to think of him as her husband. Thinking back, she couldn't remember any other Master marrying their Servant once they were with child. Was that not a thing in this situation? Did other Masters even consider marrying their Servant? There was no proof that once the singularities were resolved, the Servants wouldn't just disappear. It seemed overwhelming now, but when she and Cú were together, being in love, having kids, it all seemed obvious and natural. As Em and she lay broken in bed, it seemed like one more gaping hole of uncertainty.

"Did you ever imagine this would be how it could turn out?" Ria asked as she leaned back against the headboard and continued to run her fingers through Em's hair.

Em just shook his head against her lap as he hugged her waist; his crying had stopped, but he wasn't stable enough to speak.

"Neither did I. Neither did I."

Closing her eyes, Ria thought about the beginning of her relationship with him. It had started sweet and innocent, stoking the fire of their love slowly. It wasn't a love that burned brightly and fiercely but a love that grew in intensity over time. As she extended her thoughts to feel his body against hers while they lay there, she remembered that first night on the couch. No matter what challenges they had faced intimately, Em met them head-on with calm and assurance, knowing precisely what he wanted and was willing to do. Sighing, Ria realized it was now her turn to give him the same support he had given her.

"Em, come here." She pulled him up and held him in her arms, placing one of his hands on her belly as she kissed the side of his head. "We are in this together, so tomorrow, let's go back to the doctor and get that sonogram done."

Em sighed, an indescribable relief escaping into the room, causing the tension and sadness to leave his body as he felt the sincerity in her voice.

"I meant what I said, Rina; I will take care of us no matter what." He kissed her shoulder and squeezed her.

Smiling at the innocence of the gesture, Ria tried to reassure him. "You always have Em, no matter the situation, and I'm sorry I forgot that."

"You didn't forget. I stopped reminding you because I was so caught up in claiming you as mine that I didn't enjoy loving you the way I used to."

Hugging him to her, she returned the apology. "We all got lost somewhere."

Putting her forehead against his, she promised herself they wouldn't make the same mistakes in the future. They would trust and rely on each other, not because they loved each other, but because it was no longer just about them. That night they spent their time in each other's arms, lost in their thoughts until sleep claimed them both.