Intermission:Useless Goddess Theatre(2)

It was almost dawn.

"I was sure the waiting area for the carriages was around here… Did they move it when I wasn't looking?"

I was trying to find where I could catch a carriage. I'd gotten so caught up in my trip down memory lane that I'd lost track of time and missed the midnight departure.

I had the best sense of direction of anyone in our party; it was unthinkable that I would get lost. Which meant they must have changed the place from which the carriages departed.

It was always the same story. We'd be on a quest, and the moment I took my eyes off those three kids, they would all disappear. I was sure that if they tried to come after me, they'd just get lost on the way; it would be a rough journey. I wondered what to do. Should I wait to leave on my trip until after I made sure the others had all grown up into fully matured human beings?

It happened just then, as I was wandering around looking for the carriages and mulling over my duties as the party's guardian.

"Lady Aqua? Where are you going dressed like that?"

The voice from behind me belonged to my adorable follower Cecily.

"What a coincidence meeting you here at this hour, Cecily," I said. "No… It can't be just chance."

It was true: Cecily was a distinguished Axis disciple. She must have sensed the holy war that was about to begin; that was what had drawn her here so early in the morning.

"No, no… I was arguing with a tavern keeper. It was closing time, but I didn't want to leave. And before I knew it, it was almost dawn. Incidentally, that's where I was drinking, over there." She pointed to a bar I'd been to several times myself. I thought I remembered it being in a livelier part of town than this, but maybe it wasn't just the carriage depot; maybe the tavern had moved without my realizing it, too.

"Drinking? Yes, I understand. When I hear the words last call, I just get so frantic. It's a battle to the death after that. But then usually Kazuma comes to get me after they complain to him."

"I know exactly what you mean, Lady Aqua. When I get drunk, I just want to get drunker and louder, and it drives me frantic when they want me to go home instead."

She truly was an Axis follower: This was someone who got me.

"By the way, the bar said I didn't have to pay; they just begged me not to come back…," Cecily added.

"I see, so the barkeep is a tsundere. They would never actually want to ban pure, righteous Axis followers from their establishment. Her actions just scream tsundere. You should make sure to drop in more often."

"I'll do just that, Lady Aqua! Ahem, to go back to my question, why do you look like that?" Cecily asked, smiling brightly.

"Hear me, O Axis believer Cecily. I mourn for this world. People living good, upright lives are oppressed by the awful Demon King. And I intend to pull that source of evil up by the roots!"

"Y-you do?! You mean, Lady Aqua, you yourself are going to defeat him?

What about Megu-tan?! I don't see her anywhere! Ahem, I mean, where are Megumin and Kazuma and even that…grrr…that one other girl, the Eris-loving Crusader?!"

I wasn't sure when Megumin had evolved into Megu-tan, and it sort of bugged me, but nonetheless I said, "This journey is going to be a cruel one. I decided those three fledglings simply don't have the strength. Therefore…I shall go alone to defeat the Demon King!"

"No, you can't…! Lady Aqua, forgive poor, lowly Cecily for offering her opinion, but I think it might be best for you to bring those three along.

Otherwise, they'll only lecture you whether you win or lose, won't they?"

Lecture me whether I win or lose?

"Ooh, I wonder what I should do… Maybe a good souvenir would help…" "I'm afraid I doubt it, milady."

I very nearly said that I would just put off hunting down the Demon King, but I didn't let the words out. Bah, she might not know who I truly was, but I wasn't about to let myself look pathetic in front of one of my followers.

"Say, Lady Aqua, what do you intend to do next?"

"Good question. First, I'm going to catch a carriage to somewhere cold. The Demon King's castle seems like the sort of thing that would be built in a cold place, doesn't it? You know, the north or somewhere like that."

"Very well, Lady Aqua. Poor lowly Cecily will accompany you as far as she can."

Ahhh, my devoted Axis follower. She really must have sensed the imminent holy war, and it had inspired her.

"If you insist, then I suppose I have to let you tag along. Come on, Cecily— we're going somewhere cold!"

"Roger that, Lady Aqua. But first, maybe we could ask the carriage people to take us in the direction of the Demon King's castle. They're professional drivers, after all. I'm sure they have a sense of the right way to go."

Ah, Cecily. So intelligent. I'd known her for a long time now. Maybe it would be safe to tell her the truth. "I always knew you were capable, Cecily. As a reward, I may eventually reveal my true self to you…" "No, you can't!" she cried, sounding oddly nervous.

Ah, my humble follower, so free of any desire!