Chapter 13

Eren

Dreams and reality have become harder and harder to decipher one from the other, but nothing was harder than the ability to keep track of time. I had no idea how long I have been in this room, but I've tried to spend as much time as possible sleeping.

Or, at least trying to sleep was what I had been attempting to do, too bad even that had been alluding me. Not the sleep per se, but the dreams that I so desperately wished to immerse myself in.

At first, I had been able to imagine Dylan's face when I would close my eyes, but it wasn't enough now. Being in the darkness was getting harder and harder as time passed. The only time there was light was when he was here.

I knew that it wasn't my uncle who was sharing this miserable space with me, it was that f*cking monster taking over him unless he had willing given over his body to let him use it to do the things that I knew that he always wanted to do to me.

Being here, like this, with him was what I had expected in a small part of my brain. Unfortunately, I never imagined that it would be like this. It wasn't the chains, or the physical pain because those I had expected.

No, it was the psychological terror that he had now begun to use. Even now, as I am slumped here against the wall, I can smell the blood of the woman he had killed right in front of me the other night.

I didn't think that it could get worse than what he had first done to me by putting that damn bracelet on me, but that's what I get for thinking that he had some sort of conscience in him.

From the moment that I had realized that I could feel Dylan, but she couldn't feel me, I had tried to muster all my strength to try to escape. Ripping and tearing at my skin as I pulled and yanked my arm through the manacle wasn't enough.

Even with Dane feeding me what little strength that he had, I had been unable to get my hand free. All I ended up doing was breaking and shredding my skin to the point that blood dripped down to the floor.

At first my blood had been the only scent that filled my nostrils as I tried to calm my mind. Dark red blood that had dried and now was flaky and itchy practically covered my body.

For a while I had spent the time thinking how odd it was that one can become so used to the scents that should bother or even repulse them, but it wasn't until I was faced with a new scenario that I had begun to rethink those thoughts.

When Zane had brought that woman into this room, I wasn't fully aware of what was initially going on. There were many times when I was not fully aware of my surroundings. It was like I was floating in this weird semi-consciousness.

Hearing Zane's voice had made me shutter, but my body still ached so much from one of the strongest bursts of pain that I had ever felt some time before, that I didn't even have it in me to move my head to look at him.

When Zane had ripped and sliced at my skin and taken his nails and sunk them into the muscles on my chest around my heart it had been nothing compared to the pain I sensed from Dylan.

The worst thing was that every time that I felt something from her in any way it caused me to fret and think the worst possible scenarios that she might be dealing with. 

All of my thoughts had been on her and how things had turned out this way. Neither of us really knew much about the people that we had trusted to get her out of Blood Mist.

F*ck, even Vit hadn't really told us anything about them. He had told me that he had once belonged to their pack and that the man named Tristan was related to Dylan but wouldn't even tell me how.

Tristan, the fae male named Micah, and another unknown intruder had all found ways to get themselves into and away from Blood Mist without getting caught by the guards and my uncle.

How had we not thought of asking how they had done those things prior to agreeing to letting them set up a plan to take Dylan? No, I had been so distracted by the fact that she was my mate and trying to make her see me for who I really was that I ended up failing her when it really counted.

If I had taken even a few moments to sit with the plan and think of it from a different point of view maybe things wouldn't have turned out this way. Beyond being Alpha Rogan's nephew, I had been trained as a soldier, a guard, a warrior, and a potential heir.

Noel, Harper, Vit, and all of the other guards had spent hours upon hours to train me. How had I not even used any of that training to protect the one thing that meant the most to me in this world?

For a second, just a second, I had thought that the world had finished playing with me and I was going to be able to see the opposite side of the hand I had been dealt. Alas, again I had been mistaken.

No matter how far I let myself drown into the depths of my sorrow, there was nothing that this line of thinking would do for me except sweep me further into the dark pit of despair that I am living in.

That is where my thoughts were when I began to hear sounds of bodies touching and wanting. Zane gave me water and bread a few times, and while it was enough to keep me alive, it wasn't enough to be anywhere near satisfying.

So as my mind shifted gears and moved to being fully conscious and aware, it took me a few minutes to realize what was going on mere feet from where I was chained. While the room was still mostly dark, at least where I stood, there was soft light on the opposite side of the room.

There was a small cot that I had so desperately wished to lay upon, but as I witnessed what was happening upon it, I knew that I would never be able to get near it. Zane had a woman draped on the bed and while his body covered most of her, what I could see had me completely frozen.

A curvy woman with reddish brown hair and skin the color of alabaster was writhing and moaning beneath him. He had her caged by his body and while I could see exactly what he intended to do with her by the fact that he was completely naked. It was her resemblance to Dylan that shocked me though.

Dane only showed in glimpses here and there because one of the things that he was doing to me besides the beatings was to inject me with something that limited my access to him. He had also shoved some type of cloth inside my mouth to keep my quiet.

So, when the image of the woman and Dylan blended together in my mind, I felt him push forward. Sniffing the air, we frantically tried to confirm that this female was not our mate. 

Marq was a fae and while he may not be able to create charms and magic as strong as his brother, I knew that he had played a part in keeping Dylan hidden within Blood Mist. 

I wouldn't put it bast Zane to use Marq to create something to try to trick me into thinking that this female was Dylan, but I couldn't trust anything right now. Dane was so weak, but I could feel his panic.

Closing my eyes, I had to try to calm us both. Dane had already confirmed that the scent was not hers, but the fact that she looked so much like Dylan was overwhelming. It was then that I realized that he had done this for that exact reason.

Being chained in a room where I had no choice but to watch Zane f*ck and do only the gods know what else with this woman was torture. I only wished that he didn't realize just how much this was affecting me.

It was then that I realized that this was how he would break me. Feeling Dylan's pain was not enough, he intended to make me watch as he demonstrated to me exactly what he would do to her if he ever got his hands on her.

Before. Before everything went to hell, the last night that we had together, had started with Dylan being distraught over her last encounter with my uncle. At the time I hadn't even considered the fact that it might have been Zane sharing his body that she had dealt with.

I had scented her fear and felt her shame and confusion at the conflicting feelings that she was struggling with. I should have left that night. We should have run together, or I should have gone and attacked him when I was at my full strength.

Just then I recalled what else had happened with us that night and I regretted nothing. My heart, my whole being belong to Dylan and I had given it to her. I had given myself to her when I gave her my mother's ring.

I had placed it in the bag that she had with her that morning because I had wanted her to have it close at all times. One day I hoped that she would wear it and think of me even if she found a second chance mate in the future.

Even letting these thoughts flash through my mind couldn't keep me from being destroyed by watching this doppelganger spread out beneath my uncle's beast with no way to call out to her to run or to help her escape what I knew would happen.

Telling myself over and over again that this was not her. This was not Dylan was all that I could do as Zane moved my uncle's body above and over the girl. He had touched and teased her while covering most of her body with his own. 

Soft cries and moans still escaped the girl and while she didn't sound like Dylan, it was still hard to watch what he was doing to her. Zane was vicious and even as he had sex with this person he was nowhere near soft.

Rough touching, sucking, and biting were all a part of the appeal for him and while it was apparent that he was making sure that she enjoyed herself. I knew that he was just getting her ready for whatever he would do next.

Zane worked the girl over with his tongue and teeth along her entire body, but it wasn't until I began to smell the coppery hint of blood in the air did, I realize just how far he might end up taking this.

As his head went from between her thighs and up along her body, I heard him begin to speak to her. He called her Dylan and while my mind knew it wasn't her. I couldn't handle this blow to my senses.

Tears fell in silent streams down my face, and I yearned for Dylan. The real Dylan. My Dylan. My mate. The keeper of my soul, and the one my heart calls to. It was then that it all became too much for me.

I silently felt myself falling to the depths of that blackness. I had no ability to or desire to survive this. The woman's cries were soft at first, and I wasn't even sure if she realized that she was bleeding, but her noises were getting louder and louder as Zane kept working her over.

I didn't miss it when he moved lover down her body and looked over at me. When our gazes met, I saw nothing in those eyes. There was no light behind those disgusting eyes. No soul to be seen in them.

No. Those eyes held nothing but fathomless darkness. And in the seconds that we stared at each other I realized two things at once. Zane was not going to let this woman leave this room alive.

And the second was that this whole display, this performance was not for himself, but for me. He had done all this to see if I would be affected by his actions The worst part of it all was that I had given him exactly what he was looking for.

I wondered what he saw when he looked at me now? With our gazes locked, I felt nothing. I had nothing left and the only thing I could do was watch as that f*cking monster relished in my pain.

Zane smirked as he finally broke our gaze and continued his ministrations on the girl who didn't realize that she had little time left. So, I had no other option but to look on and watch as he played with and then discarded his little toy.

There was nothing I could do for her when he finally leaned over her, licking her neck as he spoke, "tell him how much you love this Dylan," and then sunk his teeth harshly into her slender neck.

Even though I was shocked at what I had witnessed and while I had known that this was going to be her fate. His words had pushed my broken mind to a place that had no escape.

Watching on in silent shock and horror, the only thing I could do was pray that it ended quickly. The scent of her blood, that oozed and bubbled out of her body seemed to cover everything.

When he finally removed her body, he hadn't done anything about the bedding that still had her blood coating it. When he came in hours or days later, he sat on the blood soaked cot while he ate and spoke to me as if it meant nothing.

"I hope you enjoyed the little show that I put on especially for you. You should be glad that I'm putting so much time and effort in to providing for you when you don't' deserve to even live after betraying us."

His words meant nothing to me. I didn't care what he did or what he said. His little show had left detrimental effects on me and Dane and the thought of being something that he might use to get Dylan repulsed me.

When he realized I wouldn't pay him any attention, he finally got up and left. Again, I had found myself alone in the dark, but I was surprised at how much I welcomed it now.

Thoughts of ending this before I would become another pawn in my uncle's game, I let oblivion find me and eventually I found sleep. But unlike the dreams I so desperately desired, this one held another.

My mother's beautiful face found me, and she slowly came into view. There was a light within her that spread through the entirety of her body, and I saw her not as she last was, but how she had been when my father was still alive.

The dream was quick, but I felt her brush her soft hand along my cheek before she whispered, "Be courageous and be brave and don't ever give up on living my son." 

When I woke, still in my cell, I recalled my dream. Unsure how much longer I could last, I took the words she had spoken and wrapped them around my heart. It is becoming harder and harder by the minute, but for her, I would try.