Chapter 56. "Like her?"

Man, that was quite a bit of time between this post and the last.

I can recall why that was...

Keep reading, I won't keep you.

Enjoy.

Ps. I hope you all have been well!

See you on the way out. 

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April 3rd, 2013.

Journal #056.

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So no XXXXX.

I'm single.

Good and bad.

No companionship.

But I'll live.

I'm strong...

Also friend zone with XXXXX...

It's annoying.

Painful even...

But It's life.

There are plenty of other girls out there...

But like her?

I fear a long wait...

Life rolls on...

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Lort, have merbies.

I had dug quite a deep hole for myself.

I remember breaking up with the young lady that I was with at that time, the one that I had met and started to date after the fiasco with the Librarian.

She was bright, bubbly, intelligent, independent, and so much more.

She had also met me at a pretty unstable and low point in my life, you know?

I wish I could sit and talk to her now.

I would tell her so much.

If she would hear me out, that is.

I really did like her, I just was not ready to be in any serious relationship just yet.

I simply couldn't see myself with her in the long run, and we sat and talked about it...

I remember the look in her eyes as we sat and said what was likely our final goodbyes.

A story for another time.

I was not overly invested in that dark, mysterious woman just yet, but I did have quite the amount of love for her. We had grown pretty close over the course of the past few months that we had gotten reacquainted, and a part of me had begun to think that it was maybe going somewhere, you know?

I would forget that she had a whole boyfriend at the time.

I was that go-to friend for all of her venting and problems.

When she needed a bite to eat, or a few bucks to pay a bill.

I was that guy.

I did it all genuinely, and all of my friends got that very same treatment, you know?

But I obviously was also interested in her in a manner that I shouldn't have been, knowing that she wasn't single.

I was also what...23? 24? lol

I knew it was wrong, but he was a piece of shit to her as well.

Or maybe that's just what she wanted me to believe?

Who can say?

I was there for her, and nothing could keep me from being so if I could help it.

I was slowly but surely being drawn in.

Captivated.

Yes, she threw me in the friend zone, but I was persistent.

In hindsight...

Never mind.

There are a lot of chapters ahead lol.

I won't spoil anything.

Thank you all for your time and energy, and I hope that you all have really been well.

Life here in America has been...well, I don't know if I care to bring up politics here.

Let's just say: It's been a lot.

THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR 80.34K ENGLISH VIEWS!!! 50.74K IN SPANISH!!! AND AN ADDITIONAL 9.98K GERMAN VIEWS!!!

That means the world to me, and I will keep posting just as long as you all have the stomach to keep reading this here slop lol.

Till next time folks, safe travels.

And as always:

Stay safe.

Stay healthy.

Stay vigilant.

-Redd.