pressuresore

I want to die peacefully. I still haven't come to terms with death but I've always thought about it. 

It all started with life. I wondered what life is. What would you consider a wonderful life? What does it mean to live your life to the fullest? How do you achieve it? As I was looking for answers for these questions, I saw death as an easier way of doing things. 

With death, you won't struggle with food, clothes, or any basic necessities. With death, you won't have to think about what tomorrow may bring again. There will be no molesters. There will be no one to call you stupid. And no one to tell you how much you're lacking.

I haven't made peace with death but, we're talking. Death, how do I die peacefully?

How To Die Peacefully

While waiting for school to start, I looked for a part time job, I was already 16. I became a saleslady in a known clothes shop on our town. It was hard at first. It never got easy, I just got used to it.

I'd classify the customers in 4 types. One, the window shopper. They don't really want to buy, they just want to either look around or take a shade from the sun. I don't really mind them that much. Two, the normal shopper. No need to describe, they're responsible and yeah, normal. Three, the condescending shopper. They are always right. You need to act like you're going to look for the one they're looking for even if you already know that there is no stock. They won't believe you unless you look for it. What I do is just go to the stock room, rest for a few minutes, and go back to them to tell them we have no stock left. Fourth, the discount shopper.

There are two kinds of discount shopper: the begging, and the insulting. The former is someone who will tell you that they have to go home and their budget is limited but they really need these and that. I've seen mom do this lol. The latter is someone who will insult the products and tell you why they should get a discount. I always found it funny, I'm not the one who made those anyway so I didn't really mind.

There was one time when there were a lot of customers and they were using the calculator, so I just used mental math to compute for a customer's bills. I made a mistake. I didn't carry 1. So I gave the customer 100 pesos more than the right change. I messed up big time. I only get 150 pesos a day from this job and I just let go of a hundred. I told my coworker about it, she's been doing the job longer than I did, she looked for the guy and got the 100 pesos back. I was really thankful to her. She really helped me a lot.

After that, I always made sure to use the calculator. I didn't even use a calculator during the mathematics quiz bee but I'm now using it for a simple math, how embarrassing.

I became close to my coworkers, we talked about our lives. One has a child and a live in partner who is planning to get married. The other one has a boyfriend who is in military and they're also planning to get married. The other one is in school who's also a part timer. She was younger than me.

I told them about my plans of being a doctor. They started calling me doc as a joke.

As the vacation was nearing its end, I resigned from my job and started preparing for school, I bought a binder, one G-Tec 0.3 black pen, a pencil, and some other things I can't remember. I remember the pen because it later on became my favorite pen, alternating between 0.3 and 0.4, whatever is available.

Part time job