Chapter 6

"Just great" I sighed, wrapping my arms around myself and trying to stop shaking. I covered my head with the blanket and wanted to forget about everything as I went to sleep. Unfortunately, sleep didn't come that night. I was lying curled up on the bed when Anie knocked on the door and came in with a tray of food.

"Hey Katie, is something wrong? Did you do something to anger Alpha that you have to stay in the room? Maybe there's a way to solve it." She tried to comfort me. But not today. Not now. I know that Anie didn't do anything wrong, but all my bad memories came back. All the grievances, harm and pain. The pain of being rejected before anything even started. Lying silently under the covers, I felt her hand on me.

"I know our Alpha can be too stubborn and, you know… surly at times," She added very quietly. "But I know that everything can be explained. Remember that you have me" She stood up and, leaving the tray with food, left the room. 

That day she came to me with food twice more, but I couldn't swallow anything. I just wanted to disappear. Tears began to flow down my cheeks once again. Sleep slowly came more from tiredness than anything else but not for long. The nightmares from my past were so tormenting that I woke up panting heavily. Limping I went to the bathroom, slowly unbanded my ankle, and sat in the shower, running warm water. I wrapped my arms around my knees and sat there until cold water started flowing. I slowly turned off the tap, dried myself haphazardly and returned to the room. I sat down in the chair and put my head on the backrest. In the silence and darkness I wondered what would happen to me now. 

Over time, the first rays of sunlight began to appear outside the window, but by then I felt too weak to go back to bed. At one point I didn't even know whether I had fallen asleep or simply lost consciousness. All I knew was that I felt bad. When I woke up, I was back in bed. Anie sat next to me, worried.

"Katie, please, you need to eat something. I found you in the morning sleeping in the chair. You haven't eaten anything for almost two days. It can make you sick. Eat at least a little" She asked as soon as she saw that I opened my eyes. But I couldn't. I wasn't able to. I slowly turned my head away from her, showing that nothing would come of it. Anie left the room with sadness in her eyes. 

I don't know if hours or minutes have passed, but an angry Alfa suddenly burst into the room, shouting something to me. He wanted to sit me on the bed, but I was like a puppet. My body lay limply on the bed. I guess this sight surprised Demian, because he picked me up and hugged me tenderly, shouting something about the doctor. I don't really know, because when I felt his warmth, my heart stopped hurting so much and I drifted off, finally finding peace. If I had been conscious at the time, I would have seen the panic in his eyes and the fact that he didn't want to let me out of his arms even for a moment. Well, apart from the fact that he growled at the doctor every time he tried to take care of me. 

It's funny how quickly someone can change when they see their mate in pain. Apart from the fact that he didn't want me. 

When I finally opened my eyes, I was in the arms of the Alpha. His slow breaths suggested he was asleep. Still feeling sleepy, I snuggled closer to Demian, who, feeling me move, instinctively hugged me tighter. After waking up for the second time, I sat in Alpha's arms while the doctor connected another drip. I hummed sleepily and turned my head towards Konor.

"Hello Katie, how are you feeling? Are you feeling dizzy? Does your stomach hurt?" He asked in his gentle voice. Thinking about his question, I slowly shook my head.

"For the sake of the goddess, woman, start using words" Demian growled lowly in irritation. I looked into his eyes, as if saddened by my still weak eyesight. 

Is someone feeling guilty? I wondered as I placed my head on his chest, listening to the rhythmic beat of his heart. When I don't feel like talking. I thought. Certainly not with you. 

Can anyone else see me now? Because I guess my actions contradict my words, but there is no one to point this out to me, so I will continue this farce and pretend that I am not attracted to him. His large hand gently stroked my head until I fell asleep again. I was amazed at how I was able to be drawn to this surly guy.

I was an ordinary person and I certainly didn't feel what he felt. If there was any truth in what I read, he should have been strongly tempted to commit to me. I supposedly feel safe with him and he is my type, or rather the type of every woman on earth, but there is something about him... that makes me want to be with him. Now, when I lie in his arms, I don't feel sadness, pain or suffering, I only feel peace and his pleasant warmth. But I suspect that, as soon as I get back to health, he will reject me again... I should be happy with what I have, although not necessarily in this situation. I would prefer that we had such a relationship without any illnesses or injuries. 

This time I woke up strangely rested and full of energy. The moon was shining outside the window, suggesting that I had woken up in the middle of the night. I looked around the dark room and noticed a large wolf sleeping next to me. A smile automatically appeared on my face and my eyes looked with joy at his soft fur. I reached out to him and wrapped my arms around his neck, holding him tightly. Demian looked up, surprised by the suddenness of the situation, but quickly started fawning over me.

"At least you want me" I whispered next to his ear, making him flinch. He freed himself from my embrace and started licking my face and neck.

"Yuck!! Come on, stop!" I laughed, pushing his muzzle away from me. I lay down on the bed and the big bad wolf put its head on my chest. I slowly started stroking him.

"You know your friend made a mess and it's all because of him, right?" I joked. "If he weren't like that you…uhm ….haa never mind. What do I expect, that he will throw himself into my arms and we will live happily ever after?" Wolf whimpered fawning over me. Suddenly he got up, jumped off the bed and started turning into a human. Seeing this transformation, I was worried the fun time is over. I became serious and turned away from him for two reasons. First of all, I didn't want to talk to him, secondly... he stood there in all his glory! Yes, I know I've seen him like this before... I didn't actually see it because it was in the dark. This time the moonlight illuminated his naked body and yes, everything was visible. 

Woman, you are mature and self-possessed, you don't want to openly stare at him... you are not some old pervert... fuck... he's divine. Trying to calm my pounding heart and dirty thoughts, I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to calm my breath as he stood there in silence. 

He walked over to one of the armchairs and pulled on his shorts, then walked over to the bed and lay down right behind me. He carefully put one hand under my head, which I lifted for him to do so, and with the other he wrapped his arm around my waist, burying his face in my neck. Why did I let him do this? I don't know. Maybe I wanted to have him close to me. Feel that pleasant warmth. I closed my eyes, enjoying the silence for which I was grateful. My eyes slowly started to close. When he felt my slow breathing, he gently kissed my neck and placed his head next to mine, falling asleep a moment later. 

I woke up in the morning and as if nothing had happened, I went to freshen up, change my clothes and do my hair. After a few days, I could slowly take steps and not worry about the pain. I looked like I was walking in slow motion, but it was better than nothing. I went downstairs to the kitchen and slowly approached the table full of food to quickly steal something and escape without attracting attention. As I reached for the sandwich, a large hand stopped me. I was suddenly thrown over someone's muscular shoulder and carried out of the kitchen. Partly surprised and partly knowing who it was, I was dangling loosely on his broad back without protesting. When he entered his office, he set me down in a nearby chair and pulled up a table with food and drinks next to me, then sat down at his desk and started working on some papers. Raising one eyebrow at him, I looked at the food in front of me and soon began to eat. There was a pleased growl from the desk, and I had to stop myself from smiling. Once I had eaten, I leaned my head back on the chair and patted my stomach. I sat there for a while until suddenly someone knocked on the door.