Naruto : Origin Thunder of Annihilation

Author here~! And I shamelessly giving my work a 5 stars~ Please give your honest review about my work and where should I improve it, positive and negative response accepted. But please give a reasonable comment if you decided to give me a negative review. Last word, this fanfic is only written for fun and I just wanted to share what is in my mind while I'm relaxing after a busy life of study and work.

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There are little to no, grammar mistakes however your way of making them talk or dialogue for short is unnatural. Make your character joke or some humor. When Yae wants to use illusion, I assumed she would just do it suddenly to add a bit more character; to add mischievous to her; to not make her flat. Overall, it's good and I wish you luck.

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For now its a Well written story. I Hope for its future

For those of you who came to the reviews to see if it's worth reading, just know that if you are very particular about how the author writes, plot holes and everything else, then this book is not for you. The book is well written, there are almost no grammatical errors, but there are many things that could have been done better. However, as the author mentioned, he is just doing this for fun in his free time. In short, if you are very critical, don't read it, you won't like it. If you read just for fun, like me, then I recommend reading it, it's an interesting story despite everything.

I want more :[

got no clue who that honkai character is but it seems pretty good so far like how she being shown memory's of them training n having to learn it themselves instead of just being given it for free with little effort so far story flows rather well

is a good work i like it ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Slow progress to build up character and timeline, but reasonable updates.

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